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Old 09-19-2009, 01:51 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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We don't fail if we start over.

It's one foot in front of the other, one moment at a time and just breathing.

I have two children myself and have had a stressful week so I get where you are coming from. You can start the new day clean and sober.

Keep coming back and keep posting. You are not alone! You have a message board full of people who understand or want to.
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Old 09-19-2009, 02:00 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by ScubaSteve View Post
I was weak........I feel bad......soon as I get home I'm gonna go to meeting jus got off the phone with my Doc. Sorry I guys feel like I failed you guys
Nonsense, you haven't failed anyone. Heck if everyone just quit on their first attempt and never went back nobody would be here. You have my best wishes, you CAN do this.

Oh and welcome
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Old 09-19-2009, 02:30 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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welcome back Steve

last time you had a few plans - what happened with that?

how did that Drs. appointment go?
did you hit any meetings?

D
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Old 09-19-2009, 03:34 AM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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Dr.'s apps are goin good I kus went to a few meetiings fell off course after. Jus felt like I didn't need meetings now look at me poping pills all over again
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Old 09-19-2009, 03:49 AM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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The Drs can't be going that well if you're using Steve...if you haven't - go and make a clean breast to your doctor about this and get some ideas on completely getting off the pills, reconnect with your therapist about your grief and inability to cope, and hit regular meetings to keep yourself in a programme.

It's not new advice - it's all here in this thread - but it's good advice.
The only thing thats gonna get you out of this, is action.

Start as soon as possible Steve.
D
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Old 09-19-2009, 06:19 AM
  # 26 (permalink)  
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Hi Steve,

I've found that the only time I want to stop drinking is when the pain from drinking becomes more than the pain of being sober. If you really are hurting, then there's only one way to stop, no one else can do it for you. Sometimes it takes a lot of pain to get our attention, but if we continue to use, we numb the pain, but it is still there, waiting for a sober moment to let us see ourselves as we really are. For me, when that sober moment came, the reflection in the mirror was not one I want to see again. Keep trying, and keep hugging your daughter, for she is hoping to see you as you really are soon, without the pills, back to your old fun self again.
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Old 09-19-2009, 07:00 PM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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Hi Steve,

Just letting you know I've been thinking of you.

You can and will beat this, you have so much love and support from all of us here.

Much love,

Faerie xx
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Old 09-19-2009, 08:01 PM
  # 28 (permalink)  
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alky and opiates are euphoric, steve. but devastating when you wake up and/or come down. i did the same and added xanax to the mix. it ain't worth it. i wasted too much time thinking i didn't have a problem and not enough time fixing the problem- the why of why i abused those pks. i remember i flushed down 23 tablets of amphetamine and crying until i dropped four vicodins down the hatch-that's what i did when i felt sad and lonely- drugs. you don't have to. you have a problem and you know you do. great, now comes the hard part of living a life without the drugs. prepare to be puzzled, frustrated, surprised to have money in your pocket and be prepared to be extremely hard on yourself and bored. But be prepared to get smacked in the face with the reality that life is good-even if it is a minute a time. Good luck my man
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Old 09-20-2009, 12:13 AM
  # 29 (permalink)  
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Steve, I am a recovering addict and alchoholic. I became hooked on prescription pain pills shortly after I started using them for a chronic pain condition. It did not take long before they completely took over my life. If I wasn't using, I was figuring out how and when I was going to be able to use again. The longer you go on like you have been, the harder it will be to stop. Do it now, Steve. Call your doctor and come clean. He can help you beat this, but only if he knows what's going on.
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Old 10-06-2009, 12:40 AM
  # 30 (permalink)  
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if you want to keep your home and car,family and friends i would stop while its relativly easy.i started with a 30 ml a day perc habbit and 3 years later i can not even function without 120 mls.keep in mind b4 i got to this stage i spent my life savings of over 200000,lost my home all so i could maintain a 400 doller a day habbitt.i only stopped using after i was hospitalized for a week and put on methadone.I started on the meth taking 90 mls a day and weined my way down to 25 mls.after havin a crappy day,which they all were with no pills,i took a handfull of percs.soon after i stopped takin the meth and now im right back to waking up every day and needing 80 mls of oxy just to get up.Again i face loosing everthing else i have aquired.My girl is 2 months pregnant and i still cannot stop.I guess what im trying to say is this is the most addictive substance on earth and 70 dollers a week on percs very quickly becomes 700 a week then 1400 etc.I ONLY WISH SOMEONE SCARED ME INTO STOPPING WHILE I STILL COULD.I am so lost now my family is no longer as i am 2 ashamed to even call my dad on fathers day.I have a 7 year old son which already despises me as i cant even make my 300 doller support payment,nevermind be a posive person in his life.everday i say this is the day to stop and 1 hour into withdrawl symptoms im franticly trying to score anything to make me better.EVER NITE WHILE TRYING TO SLEEP I lay there and wish i was dead. TRUST ME I KNOW AT THE START THERE IS NO BTTER FEELIN THAN THE WARMTH OF OXYCODONE BUT WHEN YOU GET TO THE POINT IM AT YOU WILL WISH YOU NEVER WERE INTRODUCED TO SUCH A DESTRUCTIVE SUBSTANCE.
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Old 12-01-2009, 10:19 PM
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Went to rehab....had a relapse me and the EX are working to fix things I had a break down fearing she would not want to be with me if she found out about my addiction. Took a few morphine and it's been south from there!
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Old 12-01-2009, 10:33 PM
  # 32 (permalink)  
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Sorry to hear you're still struggling Steve, but welcome back.
Hope you decide you've had enough soon, mate

D
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Old 12-01-2009, 11:04 PM
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Me too....
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Old 12-02-2009, 03:03 AM
  # 34 (permalink)  
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It could be even scarier than that... If she finds out about the drugs she may not want your daughter to be with you. And if she takes you back to court you won't have a leg to stand on.

If you keep using, it will eventually hit the fan. Think about what a loser you'll feel like if you lose your right to be a parent to your daughter!

It's time to drop the pills, man, before it gets any worse.

-Goat
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