33 days clean struggling
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: virginia
Posts: 2
33 days clean struggling
ok so the other night i made a bad choice with someone in the rooms... i didnt use but feel as bad as if i had used... i acted on sexual impulsivity... the guy is obviously torn up about everything and i feel like a scumbag cuz of the whole situation and cuz hes not talking to me... any advice? im avoiding calling but i really want to... sometimes i think crack and heroin were better than feeling like this
We Do Recover
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Texas
Posts: 2,619
Using won't make things any better. Sometimes it is best to just let things go....maybe for now anyway. You both need to focus on recovery. That is what is important. Don't allow this experience to run you out of the rooms, but rather learn from this and move forward. Hopefully this guy will do the same. You are not alone. 
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 26
If you're feeling like a scumbag, then all you can do is apologize. There's no time machine or any substance that can fix this. If you feel like you need to call, then call. Even if he hangs up on you, at least you won't have that terrible feeling of not knowing what's up. I know that feeling all too well, and yes, it sucks. Good luck with everything!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Tucson, AZ
Posts: 957
:ghug3 Strugglingagain,
In AA U need to focus on U, no relationship for a year, especially no 13th step. (Where U hook up with that person that U met there..)
Yes, give him/her a call and apologize.
Stay strong.
In AA U need to focus on U, no relationship for a year, especially no 13th step. (Where U hook up with that person that U met there..)
Yes, give him/her a call and apologize.
Stay strong.
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Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 2,942
Take it easy on yourself, you didn't use.
You may have acted on some character defects.
Remember also - you were only 50% of the decision, you didn't act alone.
Resolve to not repeat the behavior and move on.
You may have acted on some character defects.
Remember also - you were only 50% of the decision, you didn't act alone.
Resolve to not repeat the behavior and move on.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,416
Hi Strugglingagain
we can make a few funny choices in early recovery - like Ang said - it's best to learn from them and move on. Apologise if you think it won't cause any more harm to either of you, but if he's not talking to you, that might be best left for now.
Try a different meeting if things are too awkward maybe?
Welcome to SR - hope to see you around
D
we can make a few funny choices in early recovery - like Ang said - it's best to learn from them and move on. Apologise if you think it won't cause any more harm to either of you, but if he's not talking to you, that might be best left for now.
Try a different meeting if things are too awkward maybe?
Welcome to SR - hope to see you around
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: virginia
Posts: 2
well i went to a meeting that he was at tonight... we actually rode home together... hes not mad at me... neither his his ex... so i feel a little bit better im just hoping that a some point in my new NA life it will be as if this never happened thanks to everyone
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