It's taking all my willpower to stay sober today
bona fido dog-lover
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,776
Still sober and still hanging on. After waking up from a nice nap it's too hot and humid to walk the dogs so I'm about to wash up the rest of the dishes. I'll walkthe dogs after sundown. Thank you all for your support. It's so good to be able to come here for support instead of just caving in and drinking.
:ghug3
:ghug3
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 4,682
Hi Least
I had a run of this last Xmas, sleeping in the afternoon and then looking forward to the time when i would be able to sleep at night, mine was as long as it's past 9pm it's ok to go to bed for the night. It was almost like seeing how long i could hold my breath, i could tell you how many days i had been sober to the hour...it was hell to be honest!
Having said that, this time round it's different as i an getting face to face support through counselling (yeah i did have that at xmas too) but primarily through AA and getting a bunch of new sober friends. I don't want to harp on about AA to you, i'm just saying that i hope you are able to find a face to face support network, it really does make all the difference.
I met a guy who, although we come from very different backgrounds, is roughly my age and 7 years sober (as in happy, peaceful and content to live in his skin and the day)...so after a discussion over coffee about similarities to do with depression/anxiety/addiciton/whatever i wanted to know how to get what he had...in fact we now have the same sponsor who asked me after a couple of meetings, and after i had asked him to be my sponsor to go away and think about whether i really wanted to stop drinking...i replied yeah that's great forget all that **** just tell me what to do and i'll do it, i want what he's got lol So i started the steps and have just finished step 5 moving onto 6 and 7, then the dreaded 8/9;-) Actually i have one amend i can make now, it's an easy one by letter to an old family doctor, i've got to draft the letter and show my sponsor the format...he told me to do that 5 days ago...better get on with it!
If you could meet someone who you could relate to in some sort of meeting/group, that seemed to be having a happier life than you, with the family etc...then you may feel that you want to know how they got what you are striving for and maybe it will be as simple as just doing what they have done. Whatever you do i hope you feel better:-)
Sorry if you are doing all of this already, but hey thought i would post this anyway just in case.
I had a run of this last Xmas, sleeping in the afternoon and then looking forward to the time when i would be able to sleep at night, mine was as long as it's past 9pm it's ok to go to bed for the night. It was almost like seeing how long i could hold my breath, i could tell you how many days i had been sober to the hour...it was hell to be honest!
Having said that, this time round it's different as i an getting face to face support through counselling (yeah i did have that at xmas too) but primarily through AA and getting a bunch of new sober friends. I don't want to harp on about AA to you, i'm just saying that i hope you are able to find a face to face support network, it really does make all the difference.
I met a guy who, although we come from very different backgrounds, is roughly my age and 7 years sober (as in happy, peaceful and content to live in his skin and the day)...so after a discussion over coffee about similarities to do with depression/anxiety/addiciton/whatever i wanted to know how to get what he had...in fact we now have the same sponsor who asked me after a couple of meetings, and after i had asked him to be my sponsor to go away and think about whether i really wanted to stop drinking...i replied yeah that's great forget all that **** just tell me what to do and i'll do it, i want what he's got lol So i started the steps and have just finished step 5 moving onto 6 and 7, then the dreaded 8/9;-) Actually i have one amend i can make now, it's an easy one by letter to an old family doctor, i've got to draft the letter and show my sponsor the format...he told me to do that 5 days ago...better get on with it!
If you could meet someone who you could relate to in some sort of meeting/group, that seemed to be having a happier life than you, with the family etc...then you may feel that you want to know how they got what you are striving for and maybe it will be as simple as just doing what they have done. Whatever you do i hope you feel better:-)
Sorry if you are doing all of this already, but hey thought i would post this anyway just in case.
bona fido dog-lover
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,776
Walked the dogs anyway, tho it was hot they liked their walk. Then treated myself to an m&m frosty from Wendy's. Now I'm full and don't feel like drinking.:ghug3
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: carlisle uk cumbria
Posts: 45
your doing really well but let me tell you anxiety and depression is the major number 1 side effect of coming off alcohol,,..it does get better believe me ,,,go and see your doctor there are safe medication out there to ease your anxiety and depression while you go through the difficult phase of coming off drink ,,,hang in there it gets better ,,,
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,560
Just saw this now, S. Been saying prayers for you today. Be proud that you're successfully fighting the beast off once again.
(I don't know what an M&M frosty is either, but I want one too.)
(I don't know what an M&M frosty is either, but I want one too.)
bona fido dog-lover
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,776
An M&M frosty is a vanilla milkshake with crushed M&Ms in it. You can get it at any Wendy's burger restaurant. It's really good, have to eat it with a spoon. yummy.
feel better after the dog walk. came home tired but more relaxed. Just gave them a biscuit (their favorite) and soon their supper (another favorite). Taking care of them is good for me.
feel better after the dog walk. came home tired but more relaxed. Just gave them a biscuit (their favorite) and soon their supper (another favorite). Taking care of them is good for me.
bona fido dog-lover
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,776
Not wanting to drink today, tho my anxiety seems worse. I'll get thru this sober, one minute at a time. I'm glad to have SR to come to when I feel unsure and having cravings. It really helps!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Upstate, N.Y.
Posts: 4,639
I'm pulling for you least. I'm proud of you for not picking up. When you said you felt better after eating at Wendy's i thought of HALT - "Hungry, angry, lonely, tired. Those are the 4 to look out for.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 67
Hey Least,
I feel your pain my friend, anxiety is a miserable ruthless SOB. I will tell you I gave in to drinking once since I started this and I felt way worse anxiety the next day. From what everyone here says, it evidently *does* get better. Hang in there you're doing great!
I feel your pain my friend, anxiety is a miserable ruthless SOB. I will tell you I gave in to drinking once since I started this and I felt way worse anxiety the next day. From what everyone here says, it evidently *does* get better. Hang in there you're doing great!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 3,095
Originally Posted by least 
am having terrible anxiety and keep telling myself that drinking will only make it worse. So I'm doing what I should do to stay sober: I'm posting instead of picking up a drink.
It's the action, least. I've got all of my fear and anxiety and guilt in between me and my higher power. It's like a bunch of static that overwhelms the whisper. The only way I can clear that static is by taking action. So, dedicate yourself to the action every day. Who have you called today? Waht meeting did you go to? What have you read in the book? What did you do for whatever step you are on? These are the things that matter.
And, if it helps at all, I sufferred some terrible anxiety my first few months sober while I was working the steps. I was finishing up a divorce, facing some serious jail time, losing my job, deep in debt, etc. That 3rd step prayer got me through many days, but it was always in conjunction with progress on the steps. Progress. A little something each day to move forward. Much better than just hanging on and getting through the day.
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