I have to stop drinking
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 20
I have to stop drinking
Okay, it's taken over an hour to get registered and I almost gave up -- again. I spent the entire weekend drinking, smoking and gambling (online and casino) and I feel like crap. I drink red wine and the main goal is to get drunk. I don't want to stop after 1 drink - why would I? I'm happiest when I'm drunk and have so much fun. I'm not happy when I don't drink. Then all I get to do is work, and have to be a good mother, grandmother, wife etc - be a good person which is not fun. But I know this is killing me, and I know my kids and husband are getting worried about me. The last month has been the worst, almost everynite I'm up until 3 - 4 (sometimes until daylite) drinking and smoking and playing on the computer. Luckiily, I can 'work' from home on some days, so that helps. Everytime I try to quit I cant and I feel hopeless (when i'm sober). Thanks for letting me rant!
perpetual optimist
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Montana
Posts: 2,959
Hi Bailey,
Trust me I know the feeling. I am only on day two....I think I caught myself before I lost everything.....I think......I hope you can find the inner strength to do that too. Keep reading stuff here, there is tons of support. You sound like you are in kind of a spiral like I was........If I can quit anyone can, I was sooooooo out of control. Keep venting, you will get lots of good ideas from people. Hang out here!! You took a big step just getting here.
Trust me I know the feeling. I am only on day two....I think I caught myself before I lost everything.....I think......I hope you can find the inner strength to do that too. Keep reading stuff here, there is tons of support. You sound like you are in kind of a spiral like I was........If I can quit anyone can, I was sooooooo out of control. Keep venting, you will get lots of good ideas from people. Hang out here!! You took a big step just getting here.
Belgian Sheepdog Adictee
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: In Today
Posts: 6,101
WELCOME to Sober Recovey!! You have found a GREAT place with lots of Experience, Strength and Hope (ES&H) being shared.
Before you attempt to quit again, please go talk with your Doctor and be totally honest with your doctor on how often and how much you drink. Your Dr can be a great help in getting you through the first days of detox.
Check out SR. Read the posts and read the 'sticky's' at the top of this forum and the Alcoholism Forum, lots and lots of good info in those.
Please keep posting and let us know how you are doing as we do care so very much.
Ask questions, if we have the answers we will gladly share, if not we will help you find the answers (ain't the web wonderful? lol).
I am glad you found us!
Love and hugs,
Everytime I try to quit I cant and I feel hopeless (when i'm sober)
Check out SR. Read the posts and read the 'sticky's' at the top of this forum and the Alcoholism Forum, lots and lots of good info in those.
Please keep posting and let us know how you are doing as we do care so very much.
Ask questions, if we have the answers we will gladly share, if not we will help you find the answers (ain't the web wonderful? lol).
I am glad you found us!
Love and hugs,
there are a lot of wonderful people here that understand your situation & can help you if you do your part.Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,439
Hi Bailey
Welcome to SR
I thought I was having fun too - but it stopped being fun eventually.
Like you said, I was killing myself.
I found I was using drink to escape a life I didn't like very much - when the drinking progressed and I was no longer having fun any time, I didn't know what to do.
It was the worst time of my life - couldn't drink, couldn't not drink.
I realised I had to get sober, and I had to go back and work on my life.
I'm glad I did - it's still not perfect, LOL but I look at it differently now.
SR helped a lot. I found a lot of support and encouragement, and a lot of advice.
I hope you do too
D
Welcome to SR
I thought I was having fun too - but it stopped being fun eventually.
Like you said, I was killing myself.
I found I was using drink to escape a life I didn't like very much - when the drinking progressed and I was no longer having fun any time, I didn't know what to do.
It was the worst time of my life - couldn't drink, couldn't not drink.
I realised I had to get sober, and I had to go back and work on my life.
I'm glad I did - it's still not perfect, LOL but I look at it differently now.
SR helped a lot. I found a lot of support and encouragement, and a lot of advice.
I hope you do too
D
Resident
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Toronto, Ontario
Posts: 4,150
Hi Bailey.
Welcome to SR.
When I first quit I made a list of the good and the bad about drinking, weighed them out and decided I was marginally better off not drinking. I just reviewed that list yesterday as I suggested to someone in my sober class here at SR that relapsed to make a list of their own which he did.
To my surprise more than a few of the things on the list have proven to be illusions and excuses to get drunk.
As a matter of fact the only thing on the good about drinking is getting buzzed and it is far outweighed by the good things about being sober like better relations with my family, no hangovers, more REAL confidence, and the list goes on.
Try making a list of your own it can't hurt.
Good luck.
Welcome to SR.
When I first quit I made a list of the good and the bad about drinking, weighed them out and decided I was marginally better off not drinking. I just reviewed that list yesterday as I suggested to someone in my sober class here at SR that relapsed to make a list of their own which he did.
To my surprise more than a few of the things on the list have proven to be illusions and excuses to get drunk.
As a matter of fact the only thing on the good about drinking is getting buzzed and it is far outweighed by the good things about being sober like better relations with my family, no hangovers, more REAL confidence, and the list goes on.
Try making a list of your own it can't hurt.
Good luck.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: CA
Posts: 357
Welcome Bailey!
You've found yourself a wonderful support group.
I found I was using drink to escape a life I didn't like very much - when the drinking progressed and I was no longer having fun any time, I didn't know what to do.
It was the worst time of my life - couldn't drink, couldn't not drink.
I realised I had to get sober, and I had to go back and work on my life.
I'm glad I did - it's still not perfect, LOL but I look at it differently now.
D I have to say that I totally agree. I'm afraid that it really does stop being fun. In fact, it usually becomes a nightmare for you and everyone around you. I say this only to encourage you to keep exploring and investigating your willingness to get sober. Unfortunately, the life underneath the drinking doesn't go away. But the good news is that you can begin to make healthy choices and changes once the alcohol is no longer in the picture.
Wishing you the best. Keep posting!
You've found yourself a wonderful support group.
Originally Posted by Dee74 
I found I was using drink to escape a life I didn't like very much - when the drinking progressed and I was no longer having fun any time, I didn't know what to do.
It was the worst time of my life - couldn't drink, couldn't not drink.
I realised I had to get sober, and I had to go back and work on my life.
I'm glad I did - it's still not perfect, LOL but I look at it differently now.
D
Wishing you the best. Keep posting!
Guest
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Orlando Florida
Posts: 220
I'm happiest when I'm drunk and have so much fun. I'm not happy when I don't drink.
It was a big revalation for me to finally realize (at great cost) that voice was a Bald Faced Liar. 4 months Sober and my worst day yet is 1,000 times better than my best day Drunk.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 20
Thanks everyone for the messages. I think I'm realizing that I can't do this by myself and need help. Only made it 2 days this week without starting drinking again. I'm going to look into AA.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
I was 52 and a Grandmother when I quit drinking.
AA has/is an awesome adventure for me.
It was the wisest move I ever made...
...
All my best to you and your family
Welcome to our recovery community....
AA has/is an awesome adventure for me.
It was the wisest move I ever made...
...All my best to you and your family
Welcome to our recovery community....
Awaiting Email Confirmation
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 2,942
"I'm going to look into AA."
I got three feet from the door once, heard people laughing inside of the room, took a peek inside... turned around and left, lol. I was 'scared' that I didn't belong there.
Went back to drinking for another four (4) years!
Don't just look in!
I got three feet from the door once, heard people laughing inside of the room, took a peek inside... turned around and left, lol. I was 'scared' that I didn't belong there.
Went back to drinking for another four (4) years!
Don't just look in!
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