Drinking thoughts
 

I am on day 9 following a slip up, choice to drink, relapse, whatever the label. Today the thought of having a beer subtly entered my mind and it sounded so good! This scares the hell out of me because I know what would happen if I start. I remembered the last drinking episode and chose not to drink, but those uncontrollable thoughts are scarry since I am so vulnerable and powerless over the drink. Any advice on countering the thoughts? Sometimes my AA sponsor nor a meeting is always available at that very moment.

i read literature, call other people who are recovering, write on Steps & Traditions, log in here, talk a walk,
have a discussion with God, journal my thoughts and feelings, or write a list of things that i am grateful for.

Please keep in mind that thoughts are thoughts
and feelings are just feelings. Easy does it, okay?

First off, you're not powerless over picking up or not, you're only powerless over the effects of picking up and even then you have the power, albeit tough, to put down again. Otherwise we alcoholics would be drinking 24/7/365. The thoughts are also controllable, the mind wants to own,thinks it does, but who is observing your minds thought when it says "I want a beer"? Actually it should translate "Mind wants a beer." You can observe the thought. You can acknowledge it "There goes that mind again". You can tell it," not this time", don't fight it, it will pass on its own every single time if you're mindful. Alcoholism is a brain disease with craving one of its symptoms. As your sobriety lengthens and your recovery grows, brain placicity will help heal the damages and the cravings will decrease. If they're really bad talk to your MD about Campral,an anti-craving med.

Rochadad,

I am on day 9 (again) as well and I feel your pain. It's almost day ten though (double digits Yea!) For me the boredom leads me to think of drinking. Now that the worst of the w/d's are over my alkie mind seems to think I could really go for a vodka and lemonade. But I am determined to get through this phase and for your sake I hope you are too. Tomorrow we can be on day 10 together!

Hang in there...It's not worth starting back at day 1 as you know since this was a relapse.

Those urges pass. In early sobriety, I had to distract myself to get through them. SR is a real godsend. Read some posts, support a newcomer, congratulate people who are hitting milestones. Read the Big Book (even the stories). Listen to online Speaker tapes. Spiritual readings. This is all right in front of you!

It all works towards strengthening your recovery.

You know, now when I think of a drink I automatically think of a three day out-of-control/blackout bender and the Hell I would wake up in. F*** that.

Wow... I totally said that very thing to a friend this afternoon... and I'm on day 2. Amazing how similar we all are.

I'm having a craving right now as I type... and it's inTENSE.

But I've been down this road before (I'm a pro-relapser)... and never a truer statement was made than: the cravings always, ALWAYS pass...

I've gotten through cravings before, and I'll get through this one.

(she says as she wipes the sweat off of her brow with a shaky hand)...

I sure do hope it gets easier sooner rather than later... as I'm sure we all do.

The best way I found to counter the thoughts was to read or post here Rochadad, and to learn that a thought is not a directive.

I was amazed when I learnt this because it never occurred to me in 20 years to ignore an urge.

I know now we can think thoughts and feel feelings - and not follow through on them.

It's not a pleasant experience but we can sit through them - and the sky does not fall in.

hang in there!
D

Well said on Dee's part.

I tell my head to shut-up. I don't really get that any more as it's been quite some time for me. I have almost two years and I wouldn't have gotten this far if I gave in to what my head told me I wanted.

I would divert my focus to something else. Whether it's the tv, online games, crossword puzzle, movie, having some chocolate, whatever it takes, that what I did.

Eventually that urge/obsession will leave you. It's amazing. You can do it!! Keep posting and no matter what, no matter what, don't pick up. So not worth it. ;)

Some great experience shared here, but you know me, if I have something to add I will!!! LOL

My sponsor told me and I have passed this on to my sponsee's develop a network!! There is no way a sponsor can always be available for many reasons, but if you have a cell phone full of folks to call and you are in the habit of calling people just to chat when things are good, then calling these same folks when your butt is on fire for a drink will be far easier! This saved my butt at the 2 month mark!

Funny thing, but if you have a big enough network even if no one answers, by the time you have tried to call them all the craving will have passed!!

Have you started taking the steps with your sponsor yet? If not I strongly suggest it, for me in early sobriety I had no real solution except go to meetings, call people and do not drink no matter what!!!

I, and hundreds of thousands of others have found a good solid long term solution to life by taking the steps! Long before I was finished taking the steps the insane obsession I had for a drink was lifted, the idea of a drink became but a fleeting thought.

You see as it says in the BB, I had quit fighting anyone or anything, even alcohol because thanks to taking the steps and applying them to my life daily SANITY had returned to me!

I would be lying if I said I NEVER think of a drink, I do on occasion, but I do not even have to fight the urge, I just think to myself "Yea if I was still insane a beer would be nice in this heat, but not today" POOF no cravings, no obsession and all I have to do is apply 12 simple principles to my daily life.

Funny thing, when I first got into AA and started taking the steps I thought "Man this is tough!", well after I started to apply the steps I realized that in reality taking and applying the steps in all areas of my life was actually "The easier, softer way" I had been looking for all those years.

Drinking alcohol damages your mind and body
This is true for everyone....alcoholic or not.

When you think you want to return to drinking
I suggest you counter that distructive idea with
positive action. Prayer helps me immensley in
all areas of my life....:hug:

Hang in there! My first week was very tough, I had to fight the urge almost constantly. Now at 40 days, it's getting much better. The weekends are still a bit tough, but this place has helped me tremendously.

"This scares the hell out of me because I know what would happen if I start."

Good thought!

Very true. :)

I am only on day 56, and like you, this week I had a very intense craving to drink. And also like you, it scared the heck out of me. I start thinking I am broken so badly that nothing, not SR and/or AA, can help. From there, I get mad at myself for not having enough strength to just get through the one day.

I was up ALL night Wednesday battling my cravings while panic and anxiety had its way with me. What I am trying to do (although I have not been very successful as of yet) is to just sit with my feelings and let them be. Accept the mess I have placed myself in and move forward. Like I said my successes have been few, but I think for me the answer to the craving is acceptance.

I come to SR and read and read and read. :)

Welcome to SR. This place is very helpful.

I am taking Naltrexone for Alcohol cravings and I am very pleased with the results. People who have been prescribed both say it works better than Camprosate. It stops all physical cravings and more importantly mitigates obsessive thinking. No side effects and non-addictive too.

Wouldn't it be wonderful if that refreshed, reborn, cleansed, positive outlook on life that we have each sober morning we arise.... was a feeling that never went away? :c033: