Notices

My 1st post...dont know why...

Old 07-25-2009, 01:33 PM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 2
My 1st post...dont know why...

ok im 25 im from the uk.
I have a drink problem, i always drink when i cannot cope but its getting worse. Many hard things have happened to me during life- for one i have a daughter i cannot see and this does not help me with my drinking.
I am so ashamed to post on here, i had a problem with drugs but have now stopped that, just the drink gets to me i find it hard to go a day with out it as it blocks my memory and thats all i want. Each day is just a struggle with depression for me. I dont mean to moan, i no i need help but i am scared i never will go get any.
ant83 is offline  
Old 07-25-2009, 01:44 PM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Member
 
MycoolFitz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Here, Now
Posts: 4,268
Seeking help and support is not a shameful act but a courageous one. Using drugs and alcohol medicate feelings is common among us and one of the red flags of alcoholism. I think you do know why you are posting, you're reaching out. As far as being afraid you won't go get any, you're already starting the process, it's up to you to continue it. There is a lot of caring, non-condemning help that is just a phone call or a room away. It's up to you. My experience that medicating your feelings and circumstances away never works, can never work and always makes things worse in the long run. Sobriety is yours for the taking. All my best
MycoolFitz is offline  
Old 07-25-2009, 01:44 PM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Anna's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,330
Hi and Welcome,

I'm glad that you found us.

I used alcohol to help me cope too, and it took over my life and nearly destroyed me. You will be much more likely to be able to see your daughter, if you live a sober life. Have faith that things will work out with seeing her.

Have you talked to your dr about depression? It could be that the alcohol is causing the depression, or if the depression came first, then medication might help.
Anna is offline  
Old 07-25-2009, 01:54 PM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Living in sobriety
 
nelco's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 3,870
Hi Ant. there is no shame in seeking help. Today is the first day of the rest of your life. I hope you stay, browse and find what your looking for. There is a way out. I was once chained by the bottle and it took a lot from me, especially my piece of mind. But there is a solution and none of us need live in fear. I found AA. that was my experience, many years ago, and I live a happy contented life today.
nelco is offline  
Old 07-25-2009, 01:57 PM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 2
thankyou for the words in the above posts
i have not been to see a doctor, there is a part of me which i know is telling me this is wrong, but on the other hand i like they way drink makes me feel if that makes sense. I always keep things bottled up, i find it hard to talk to people about how i feel. i cant even tell my family or my closest friends i just disguise the problem. This may sounds stupid, but even if i did sort my addictions out i have nothing at the other end....there is nothing i have in my life that makes me want to change what i do, its sad but how can i be helped when most of the time i dont want to?
ant83 is offline  
Old 07-25-2009, 02:04 PM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: UK
Posts: 129
Hey ant. I'm in the uk too. I also have (clinical)-depression. I agree with what the others said, especially Coolfitz and nelco, you don't have to feel ashamed whatsoever. I'm proud of you even though I don't 'know' you, for getting this far.
just take your time and share when you want to. No pressure. Feel free to write a billion words or just a few.
As for more practical help: I went to the local substance abuse building or Rehab, run by the Council. I'm sure you have something similar wherever you are. I detoxed at home, but got some meds from the rehab place to help with the withdrawal symptoms. You can do that.
I am on Effexor (Venlafaxine)-for my depression.
One step at a time, ant. That's the way forward.
You've taken the first step by writing your post on this Board. Just keep on keeping on.
Feel free to Pm me.
Take care!
eoghanacht is offline  
Old 07-25-2009, 02:07 PM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Disposable Hero
 
Wolfchild's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Being, ME
Posts: 3,758
Hello and welcome to the SR community.
Wolfchild is offline  
Old 07-25-2009, 02:09 PM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Member
 
Taking5's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 5,068
Hi and welcome. I can't add much to what others have already said but you are not alone. Many more UK members will be along shortly as well.
Taking5 is offline  
Old 07-25-2009, 04:44 PM
  # 9 (permalink)  
everything is already ok
 
nogard's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Melbourne Victoria Australia
Posts: 19,770
Welcome to SR
nogard is offline  
Old 07-25-2009, 05:11 PM
  # 10 (permalink)  
Member
 
CornflakeGirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 38
Hello...welcome! Glad you are here.
CornflakeGirl is offline  
Old 07-25-2009, 11:42 PM
  # 11 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 184
Hi Ant, Welcome to SR.

Originally Posted by ant83 View Post
...I always keep things bottled up, i find it hard to talk to people about how i feel. i cant even tell my family or my closest friends i just disguise the problem.
I felt just the same, Ant. I couldn't talk to anyone about my addiction to alcohol for years and years. I couldn't talk to anyone about how I felt about anything really. I pretended everything was great. So, I drowned it all, until I couldn't anymore. Then I came here to SR and started reading and posted a couple of times, still deep in my delusion. Little by little I've been able to open up here, and to a few people IRL -still working on it. So start with us, Ant.


This may sounds stupid, but even if i did sort my addictions out i have nothing at the other end....there is nothing i have in my life that makes me want to change what i do, its sad but how can i be helped when most of the time i dont want to?
I can't make any promises, but, you may find after getting sober and getting into recovery that there are things you've been overlooking - or new things - that are worth being 'awake' for, that can make you feel good and happy. Could be worth a try?

Glad you found SR, stick around.
monkey1 is offline  
Old 07-26-2009, 08:21 AM
  # 12 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: cheshire, uk
Posts: 14
hello fellow brit

you shouldnt feel ashamed about your situation. people say that to me on here but i still feel ashamed about the mess ive got myself in. dont worry too much but try to do 1 day at a time. yesterday has gone so you cant do much about that and tomorrow isnt even here yet so no point in going there. just concentrate on today and stuff may get better. try the chatroom. theres loads of good solid people there to help us all on our way

dandare
dandare is offline  
Old 07-26-2009, 08:30 AM
  # 13 (permalink)  
Member
 
KenL's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 1,385
I'm glad you're here ant. I can relate to you on not being able to see your daughter. I am divorced. Although I can see my kids almost any time I want to now, the first few years were very difficult to adjust to. I would not see them for 8 days at a time. It was so hard. Truly gut wrenching. A feeling that I never wish to feel or have anyone else feel. Sadly, divorce and other reasons separate us from the ones we love the most. But you are young ant. You can change things in your life so that you can see your daugter more. Believe in yourself and start making the changes you need to make. Do it for yourself primarily but also for the sake of your daughter. I'm sure that one day she and you will be close if you begin to make the changes now. Keep the faith.
KenL is offline  
Old 07-26-2009, 09:07 AM
  # 14 (permalink)  
Rockstar
 
Sikkisirus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Wales, UK
Posts: 634
Never be ashamed for reaching out and asking for help. I for one admire your courage. Im a fellow Brit and newbie too, welcome to the board
Sikkisirus is offline  
Old 07-26-2009, 09:44 AM
  # 15 (permalink)  
Resident grateful guy!
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Bloomington, Mn.
Posts: 120
Don't be so hard on yourself. Addiction is a disease and it's nobody's fault. None of us asked to be this way. I try to tell people this as much as possible. You're a good person with a bad disease. :praying
SomeCallMeTim is offline  
Old 07-26-2009, 10:06 AM
  # 16 (permalink)  
Member
 
TheSunAlsoRises's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Traveling in Europe
Posts: 415
Hey man asking for help is really hard. All of us can relate. Just coming on the boards is a solid step. I'm so sorry about the situation with your daughter. I don't pretend to know how hard that is(no kids). However like others have said doing good things for yourself is the best step you can take. In the midst of active illness its almost impossible for many of us to imagine there is any reason to try to do things better. That's the bottle talking. Good luck man--I have found AA incredibly helpful--but all of us have to take our own path.
TheSunAlsoRises is offline  
Old 07-26-2009, 10:07 AM
  # 17 (permalink)  
6/20/08
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 4,467
Welcome to SR, Ant. There is nothing to be ashamed of, here. I hope you read and post, here. It will help if you let it.
coffeenut is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 02:19 AM.