Astro

I'm not a doctor, but I think you might want to get a second opinion. Scares me to think that any physician would pass it off like that. Glad you're still checking in here and not giving up.

Dee74

I drank cos I was bored too - and sad, and angry, and happy, and in pain....
and I am an alcoholic.

If you can't go three days without a drink, it's obviously a fairly serious problem Ben. Doesn't really matter whether you or your doctor call it alcoholism or not.

I really suggest you find another doctor who knows a little more about addiction/alcoholism, Ben.

Given any thought to other kinds of face to face help, mate?
D

Iamscared

He says that as I don't wake up and need a drink, it's not serious.

Christ, I thought admitting it was supposed to be an important part of the process. Imagine being told you don't have a problem when you yourself have accepted you do and decided to seek professional advice. !

Dee74

That advice might have killed me - for my money, definitely time to switch doctors.
D

Astro

Uh, yeah, I'm going to suggest again maybe getting a second opinion.

I rarely drank in the morning. Instead I watched the clock all day, at 4:00 PM I had a green light from my boss to start cracking open beer bottles, most nights I stopped when I passed out or blacked out.

Iamscared

I drink until I drop aswell.

Problem is, I always make sure I have enough in the fridge to ensure this possible.

I drive to work in the morning, pissed. It's a 20 mile trip.

At night I don't want to go to bed, in the mornings I don't want to get up, and if I do, I am a danger to others when I get in my car.

I have this recurring thought - if I go out at night in my car, to stock up from the local 24/7, and run someone down, but have no recollection of it and wake up in a cell, I wouldn't be able to feel remorse, as I would have no recollection of it happening.

Imagine that, I would appear to be a heartless *****. But that's not who I am, at all. I am a nice guy.

Crap, i hate myself a lot sometimes.

Hence why I am always stocked up with enough to collapse.

Dee74

I really cannot stress how important it is you don't drink and drive Ben.
You really need to do something, now, mate.

D

Astro

I'm a nice guy too. Used to be a loving husband and a caring father. The problem was, when I picked up a drink, all bets were off. Dr. Jekyll becomes Mr. Hyde. I used to drink & drive my kids around just about every day. It makes me cringe to think about what I could've done to them or someone else.

suki44883

I never drank in the mornings, either. Man...don't drive if you're drunk. You could hurt or kill someone and then you'll really know the meaning of the word misery. The first step to not drinking is not to drink. Don't buy any. Don't go to the bars or pubs. Don't go visit friends that drink and have it available. You have to put some effort into this or it's just going to get worse. You have a decision to make, dude.

Iamscared

I don't visit anyone, I drink at home, alone.

It has cost me a couple of jobs, a few serious relationships. (2 yr+)

Last night, I didn't drink, I went to bed at 9.30pm and read a book.

I never read, and I mean, never, but I read 300 pages over 5 hours. I nearly finished the book I bought on the weekend.

Tonight, why did I relapse?

I had beers in the fridge last night, but didn't touch them.

It's boring as hell, listening to me, but I will keep coming back to read other peoples' posts.

It feels like affection. It keeps me sane.



Tonight, I don't know what happened,

suki44883

Get rid of all the alcohol and don't buy anymore. You drank it because it was there. Just because you didn't drink it last night doesn't mean anything. You drank it tonight. Get rid of it.

Astro

I call it unconditional love, compassion, and tolerance. We're all sick, but thankfully we're not all sick on the same day I keep coming back for the same reasons.

NEOMARXIST

Man, I could have written this a while back. My inability to avoid blackouts was really starting to worry me. I could have killed someone and been totally oblivious to it and have no recollection whatsoever.
I lost my license for 2 years for drink-driving, it is ridiculous to think I drove that night, a callamity of errors, the irony being that night was the worst weather driving home from work that I couldn't stop off for any food from any takeaway as the snow and ice was that bad that I was worried I wouldn't make it home. I managed to get 3 litres of 'Organic vintage' (classy!) 7.5% cider and a 750ml bottle of alcohol pop though.

I proceeded to down the alco-pop in one, as intended to feel that instant buzz, and then pretty much downed the cider. I finished work at 5.30pm and I was arrested for drink driving at 10.00pm. All because I spilled my cottage pie that I drunkanly got out of the oven and then vaguely remeber trying to speed round to the chip-shop before it closed. I just remember crashing my car into a hedge at great speed and the police rocking up a few minutes later. I could have killed somebody or myself.

Its funny because people always say to me when i tell them about the drink driving conviction "I bet you won;t do that again" and I think to myself if I am drinking then I probably would as I am powerless over my actions when I drink. How could I say I wouldn't drink and drive again when I can't remeber what I do/say when I drink because everytime I drink I drink untill I passout. The only way I can guarantee I will never drink and drive again is by never taking that first drink.

Anna

You were on the right track by finding a good book and reading last night. It's great to find something to enjoy and that breaks the routine of drinking. My advice is to get rid of the alcohol in the house. It might help you to get past a moment like you had this evening.

Please don't drink and drive. You are better than that and you need to believe you're better than that.

Iamscared

I woud have no-one to talk to about this without this forum.

So, for me, although my personal target has been shattered, at least I am sharing it with others.

It's no biggie either, If i am trying once a week and doing a day, then maybe next week I'll manage 2 days.

suki44883

Have you considered talking with your doctor, being honest with him about your drinking and asking for help? They can give you something to help with the cravings or withdrawal; however, you are going to have to be willing to feel some discomfort. No one said it was easy, but it is very simple.

NEOMARXIST

I think it comes down to wanting to be sober more than wanting to be able to get drunk. You only reach that point when you reach that point and untill then you will proably end up getting drunk again.

Mariposa18

If you are going to get drunk, PLEASE for God's sake, DO NOT DRIVE!!!! And you are right, everybody has a different "bottom". But why wait to hit it? You already know you have a problem, so stop right now, don't wait until tomorrow. Just because you've woken up fine every time so far it doesn't mean you can't drink yourself to death one day.

I'm not trying to be mean, just lately I seem to hear a lot of people trivializing drinking. It can and will kill you and it doesn't have to be by over drinking. Every time you get in your car drunk you are putting others in danger as well as yourself. That's the epitome of being irresponsible. Picture one of us driving on the road at the same time as you drunk. I'm with my family, and you drunk plowing into us and killing us all.

Still want to drink and drive?

suki44883

It happens more often that we'd care to realize...

Benson sentence believed to be one of the toughest in state - JSOnline