collegegirl

For those of you who have successfully gotten sober, what has it been like for you? What have the good parts and the bad parts been? Do you feel like it was worth it? How do you feel physically?

I'm in the process of trying to get sober... haven't been too successful yet, but I'm trying. I'm curious how everyone experienced this.

Thanks!

smacked

The past 11 months of sobriety have by far been the best months of my entire life.

It's not easy, but life isn't easy.. we are all stronger than we think.

I have been challenged beyond belief and risen above with strength and a clear head.

I have never once regretted being sober... I have never looked back. Why would I? My life is amazing.

coffeenut

Welcome to SR, collegegirl.

I drank for 30 years. Spent the last year sober! This is what I've really noticed: I feel Great! I wake up ready to start the day. I don't seem to be as grumpy.

My face looks so much better. I would venture to say I've lost 5-8 years off my age because I don't have that red/blotchy/swollen look.

My relationship w/my family is healing. I have some work to do in this area, but it is so much easier sober.

I could go on all day!

If you can, quit now. Don't put yourself through hell for 30 years. Be smart, Now.

CoF1984

I've been sober for almost 6 months now, and I've had a lot of great experiences since quitting drinking. I've noticed I can make it through my bad days a lot better than I could when I was drinking, I feel a lot better than what I used to and not constantly sick anymore. Also noticed that I'm not as stressed all the time I guess because by drinking I was inducing 95% of my own stress. I've had a great experience, some struggles and bad days, but with each struggle and each bad day without a drink I get just a little bit stronger and it turns out so much better than it ever has in my whole drinking career.

And welcome to SR, keep coming, reading and posting and most of all keep trying and never give up. You've found a great place here with lots of great people and advice. I hope everything works out well for you.

Wes

jamdls

I didn't stop drinking until I was 50, I wasted so many years of my life I barely remember my 40th decade. The past 2 years have been absolutely wonderful! The first 9-12 months were difficult because I had to get past my shame and guilt for drinking and the things I had done; and I didn't seem to know how to socialize sober. My only regret now is that I didn't stop drinking a LOT sooner.

keithj

I got sober by having a spiritual awakening as the result of taking AA's 12 steps. I started out as an staunch atheist.

My life in recovery has been beyond my wildest expectations. I didn't want that, I didn't consider it was possible. I just wanted to quit drinking. I just wanted to feel better. I wanted to quit waking up and vomitting, quit being arrested, quit all the negative consequences.

I didn't expect to have my whole perception of life and my reaction to it profoundly altered. I can say without any hesitation, that my life in recovery is way more satisfying and gratifying than my life even before I started drinking.

The best parts: I learned to be fulfilled. I learned what grateful and love mean on a heart level instead of being mental concepts. I learned how to feel deeply for my fellow human beings.

The worst parts: Hasn't been a downside yet, and I've been living this way for a while. It just gets better.

shelly009

I have been sober a little over 30 days now and I feel GREAT!! I was more of a Binge drinker or weekend warrior so I didnt drink everyday but I was starting to feel down on myself for drinking at times when I hadnt planned to or drinking more than I intended.

My husband and I made the decision to try a cleaner lifestyle and its fantastic. I look better, have lost weight but most importantly I feel better about myself than I have in years. My husband says he has a new wife and I feel like a new person.

The first week was pretty easy but trying to think of fun and entertaining things to replace drunken weekend BBQs and sitting around getting drunk (what a fun activity huh... not really) was a little challenging. And there are times when I wonder what it would be like to get drunk again... but I play it out in my mind and it doesnt look so good.

My advice, if you are going to stop drinking, get a list of things that you have always wanted to do (especially things you couldnt do while drinking) and start working on that list. The last month I have been running, cycling, kayaking, camping... I even started writing a book.

Life is good!! You wont regret it!

tommyk

"My life in recovery has been beyond my wildest expectations." by KeithJ.

I was going to say the same exact thing.

Someone at an open picnic recently stood at the microphone and asked if there was anyone who would like to come up and say a few words about how much sobriety sucks, and/or talk about all of the problems they've encountered due to not drinking.

No one went up to talk about that.

FightingIrish

Everything that Keith said.

I will add that something I learned is that the same person will drink again. Meaning, if I just took the booze away and didn't do anything else, I would drink again. I had to change my fundamental perception of everything.

Michael

JFRUIT

I am 106 days sober , its had its ups and downs but the positive has byfar outweighed the option of getting high. I have become the husband and Dad that I needed to be in addition I have been working out , eating properly and learning the benifits of living in peace, love and gratitude. My luck in life has changed as well, things that were going against me are starting to workout in my favor. Its been a lot of baby steps with many more to go.

coming_clean

I'm around 150 days sober now, i kinda lost track....

I feel more energetic, i have a healthy colour i can devide a big problem into subproblems wich are often fixable. Almost out of debt, if all goes well i'll be at university in a month (i'm 25), more patient, more results from working out, more results from meditating, my vocabulaire both in Dutch and in English, my reflexes, i'm dreaming again, i feel well rested after eight hour of sleep, I needed at least ten, my short term memory is improving and thereby my long-term memory, it's more quite in my head (five more years of pot smoking all day and i proberly would have become a schitzofrenik), I'm more focussed, less irrational fears, less irrational thoughts,

in short; a happier, healthier life with more debt then i ever thought possible....

bjork

I'm only 33 days sober. So I can only tell you what I have felt immediately and soon after quitting.

My first 2 weeks I felt very tired, but I also felt very good. It felt like my body started rebuilding itself inside and brain cells started coming back. I felt like I was thinking clearer since I wasn't impaired with alcohol and always woke up feeling clean, refreshed, and overall pretty good. I also remember conversations I have with people the night before. My body has ached, but I have been at the gym almost every day.

I have had to stay away from situations that were alcohol focused (no bars). I have been spending time with friends shopping, lunch, dinner, cafes, etc.

I have had more time to get stuff done. My place is much cleaner and neater. I feel like I am a much better person than I was when drinking. I feel more confident in my feelings.

It really feels great!!!!!

shelly009

Ya I forgot about that! That was unexpected, I felt very... peaceful almost and quite tired. Didnt know that was normal... guess thats why!

Gypsy Feet

I am at 6 months, and I feel like I have climbed out of a toxic place into. . . the most amazing life! The self discoveries have been coming like mad these past 3 months.

I never knew, eek I'm in tears writing this! I never knew how far astray my life had gone from what it could and should have been.

I never imagined the peace, strength and beauty lying dormant inside me, buried in crud.

I have always lived my life without regrets. My drinking, drugging and codie days were not without value, and I would not go back and change a thing, and yet. . .it is so hard not to wish, just a little, that I had come to find this place I am at sooner.

SomeCallMeTim

Compared to where i was 49 days ago, i'm a walking, talking miracle. I don't want to keep repeating myself, so if you want just go to my blog entry or check my thread history to see my story in it's entirety. :praying

getr345

My experience in a nutshell:

Amazed I finally took the first scary step.

Proud I continued to take new steps towards total sobriety.

A few missteps along the way, OK. Lessons learned.

Walking now on the path.

Straight and narrow.

sfgirl

I'm 27. I drank heavily since I was 14. I am coming up on 10 months sober in a few days. This has been my experience which has both ups and downs. I get frustrated by people who say it is all rosy because that is not how I have experienced it. However, it is completely and utterly worth it. There is nothing more worth it. Know though that you probably won't immediately feel amazing in your mood. It isn't like getting high. Getting sober isn't a quick fix, it is a long and amazing journey but it is hard work to create lasting change and it is something that you learn to appreciate so much more than your previous life.


1. I look way better— I am no longer puffy in the face, I have lost weight even though I eat ice cream all the time, I work out so my body is buff now, my skin is glowing, seriously people tell me I am amazing looking now and they don't even know why

2. I physically feel better— if I eat crappy one day I feel kind of lethargic and hate it and I am like wait how did I survive hang overs every single day of my life. I can wake up and do anything at any time of the day or night no problem and fully concentrate.

3. My mind and cognitive function is vastly improved— I would like to star this one. You can read how alcohol damages your brain and you might think it doesn't affect you (I graduated from an Ivy league university drunk basically with a great GPA so I sure as hell didn't). I was wrong. My cognitive functioning is vastly improved. I am so much more aware of things in my life. I can tell this because I was in therapy before while I was drinking and I am in the same therapy now sober and it is like night and day. Really, it is amazing.

4. I can wake up and not be ashamed of the night before and/or remember the night before— major. I forgot that shame and then would have friends tell me stories of their nights and mornings and I would be like thank god that is not me.

5. I have a greater improved sense of self— I feel stronger inside. This is where the recovery work comes in whether you do it through AA or through therapy like I did or some other way this is what makes it all worth it. I feel like I am getting back in touch with who I really am and again I didn't even realize the extent to which I didn't know who I really was. I thought I had that down pat.

6. I am learning how to feel feelings— addicts have a tendency to not want to feel negative feelings, I certainly did. Now I am learning to feel them. This is difficult, especially at first. It gets easier. But you have to be sad, uncomfortable, angry, all these things you avoided being for so long. The pay off is that you are actually living life and growing and having a much more nuanced experience. I have also had to live through some feelings about events that I had tucked away— this perhaps is why I have spent a lot of my early recovery more sad than happy.

7. The hole in my soul went away— again I would like to star this one. I hate the wording I used but I can't use any other words. People talk about alcoholism being a spiritual malady and whether or not that is true for you I don't know, but for me I used to tell my therapist I felt like I was having a crisis of faith even though I had no faith and never had. There was something missing, like a big void inside of me, and I didn't get it. I started reading existentialist literature in search of answers when the real answer was actually sobriety, recovery, and reconnecting with myself. Now I can be sad and there is no longer that void. And I can be happy and there is not that void. That void was with me for a long time. I couldn't shake it. That for me is major.

8. Dealing with friends is difficult— dealing with your friends is difficult. Because I didn't go the AA route I don't have a lot of recovering and/or sober friends. This makes it hard because all my friends were people I used with. It is hard to refind your place among them while you are changing. And ultimately you end up cutting out a lot of them. Right now I am faced with the challenge of wanting to relate more intimately with people and not finding myself in the right types of social situations. However, this is my current challenge and while difficult these challenges of recovery have become fun. They are sort of the challenges of life now. And improvement happens while sober unlike it did while using because I am aware and centered.

9. I found some direction in my life— people say get sober and things fall into place. I actually believe this. If you get sober and work on yourself, on the internal, it is strange but things seem to fall into place, things that might have been longterm struggles you suddenly find the answer.

10. Gratitude— I actually do feel really grateful to be sober. This didn't happen right away. I think it took about 6 months. But that gratitude is awesome. You should do it. I mean I think you are young because of your screen name. It is so worth it. I feel like once you cross into sober world you realize how little of life you were living while using. And how little life even some people who don't use live. Recovery is quite amazing although difficult and not always fun and happy.

Good luck!

Hevyn

Hi collegegirl. I'm at 18 mos. sober - I'm like coffeenut & jamdls - finally doing what I should've done decades ago. At first, I felt like an alien, a fish out of water. I was filled with remorse and guilt. I soon realized these were useless emotions that would only hold me back from recovering. I had relied on booze to see me through every situation where emotions were involved - happy, excited, grief-stricken, scared - all were dealt with by drinking. Not good - no emotional growth, no coping skills developed.

I'm glad you are getting it at a young age and will not have the terrible chaos in your life that many of us have. It's great to have you here as part of our family. Some great minds and wonderful people dwell here at SR.

Music man

I am 173 days sober. It's been the best thing I have ever done. Truthfully it feels like I've been sober for years, I've almost forgotten how bad things were!
On the subject, once you do it, kit's done. For me it was 2 months before I felt anchored down with sobriety.

Thank GOD I did it !!!

Good luck getting sober, I will say this was the place I did it in, and without SR I might not have made it.
I don't post much here any more but I know where my starting point was and have a large RESPECT for S.R ....

Love you guys!!

least

Since deciding to get sober I've had two sober periods: each around six months. Very recently I relapsed and was so scared cause I let it happen. I was doing so well being sober and felt better physically and mentally. I am working on getting my sober time back and STAYING sober. I like myself so much better sober. I don't like my drinking self at all.