lauraandersen4

It is time for me to take a break from this forum just for a little while, as it is definitely not fair for those of you trying so hard to achieve sobriety to have someone like me here. Yesterday, I got a little out of control because I didn't understand why someone wouldn't believe what I have posted on this forum. What was so outlandish about my true story, that someone would feel it wasn't real at all? At that moment, realized 2 things.

1. I am an obstacle to success
2. That I don't deserve to be here until I'm ready to give it 100%

For my word to be heard... I have only exaggerated once on this forum... I said I was drinking 3/+ glasses of wine on a typical night... when in fact I never elaborated to the point of saying they were 8oz red plastic dixie cups. I knew that for me, my drinking wasn't healthy. I decided to not drink for nearly a week before I knew I would be around alcohol on July 4. That day, I didn't even think to stop... all day. Worse, I never wanted it as bad as I did after restricting myself.

To clarify... I am not the Laura who wanted to try controlled drinking. I have already tried this and generally am not too successful (unless someone else is paying for my drinks out because I'd feel guilty wasting their $) because after the first, I stop caring for whatever reason. I don't think I can simply limit myself to 1 drink. Actually, I have no interest in doing so... it's not about the taste...not having a better buzz after I start to feel one would drive me up a wall.

Finally, I wanted to thank all of you who do believe me... for all of you who have offered support and advice. It wasn't for naught, trust me. I have it with me and I am more appreciative than you could ever imagine. When I decide that I need additional advice or when I decide I'm ready to cut the alcohol out of my life etc... I'll return. For the next little while though, I probably won't be logging in (I may float) etc... so don't be offended about not returned PMs. Thank you so much for this experience and for helping me to figure some of this stuff out. Truly an amazing group of people as a whole. I congratulate you all and send only my warmest wishes.

Godspeed,
K

Bamboozle

Hello, fake laura.

If I had left because I wasn't ready to give it 100% I wouldn't be sober right now. I didn't get to the point I'm at now overnight.

SR is here for those who need it the most. If you are struggling you need to be here. I hope you reconsider and stay. You are always welcome here.

flutter

I wasn't ready for a long time, either. Unfortunately, it almost cost me everything including most importantly, myself.

Take care, we'll be here if you come back.

vegibean

Take care of yourself!!

CarolD

All my best ...
Members come
Members go
Bless them all on their journey.

Gypsy Feet

Don't go far. It seems to me you'll be ready real soon *hug*

tyler

Hope you don't stay away long. This is a helpful resoruce for many, even if they aren't "ready to give it 100%". I don't ever recall that being a requirement to join. In fact I don't really recall there being any requirements to join, other than to respect others and I dont' think you've done anything to violate that.

Do what you need to do for you. We'll still be here when you are ready to come back. Take care. BTW, I think you have made a lot of progress in a very short time that you have been here. It certainly took me far longer!!

Dee74

good luck with whatever you decide K

D