ssq5509

Went into a recovery center in May...came home a week ago tomorrow to come home to an awkward situation with my girlfriend..

.she loved the indepedance she had while I was gone...I agreed...and relieved her by finding my own place and moving in the following friday...
Going to meetings and just realizing that I have no control over her...

the fear of her moving on scares me...
We both agreed that we would still date (be together)...but live in separate places..
Ive never had my own apartment......
And its my sober haven ya know?
Finished my steps...that totally changed my life.
thats why I keep coming back to those meetings..
I want that same high....


but the lonliness is killing me......

Anna

Congratulations on your sobriety and on how far you've come!

I think it's good that you are living independently at the moment. It will give you a chance to be yourself on your own. And, your girlfriend is okay with you dating each other. Have faith that things will work out the way they are meant to.

Freeport

Congrats on 77 days: You're exactly one week ahead of me. Sounds to me like you're doing very well. Matters of the heart aren't easy, but on your worst days, remember: At least you’re sober. And you're not alone!

Keep posting.

Astro

Welcome to SR, good to add another Zonie to our little family in recovery

I know the loneliness is hard, I came into recovery while working on a divorce, and for the first couple years being alone was crushing, I wanted the comfort and security I had found for most of my life in relationships.

But looking back, being on my own was the best thing for me. It gave me the necessary time to work on my recovery, attend as many meetings as possible, and most of all it gave me the chance to discover new friends within the fellowship, those people became my family and remain that way today.

This is a good time for you to discover your independence too, to put together safe havens at home as well as in the rooms of recovery. I hope you'll make the most of this time, and give some thought to what your goals for the future will be.

God did for me what I couldn't do for myself, He gave me the time to become the friend, fiance, and father that I am today, that time alone was a great gift as a result of my sobriety.

SomeCallMeTim

Being in a relationship while trying to sober up or while early in recovery can be a very dangerous thing. It's too easy to focus on the other person and not yourself. You have made a very good decision. As far as the loneliness goes, i find that my AA meetings are a sure cure for that. Lots of people who are going thru, or have gone thru exactly what you are. You'll make a lot of good, true friends there. :praying

MycoolFitz

I have a similar problem but its with my wife, not my girlfriend and we own a house so it'll be very interesting to see how things work out. For better or for worse, in sickness (except addiction) or in health. I've been out of treatment 3 months (and sober) but its pretty hairy still. But hey, I've got my sobriety and I'm not about to let life's little trials and tribulations derail me. Best wishes

ssq5509

Thats right!.....

ssq5509

Thats awesome!....congrats on your sobriety!!

Dee74

Lots of good advice here
so I'll just add my welcome to SR ssq5509!
D

gerryP

Congratulations SSQ on 77 days of sobriety.

Have faith and keep doing what you're doing, you sound like you are doing everything right and managing extremely well. Everything can seem or *is* daunting for awhile, that's understandable but keep moving forward. Things will feel better.