update...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Europe
Posts: 1,361
update...
I'm quit drinking and smoking weed about four and a half months ago. Drinking could have become a problem, but I quit in time. Smoking weed however was my drug of choice. Giving up that was really really really hard. Not the drug and it's actual effects, but facing real life. I'm managing. One day at a time i'm getting back on track.
I'm still a few hundred in debt, but in about two months or so i'm in the clear. Searching for another job. Desperately. The work i'm doing now was okay as a stoner, but now i'm bored so much every day is a struggle. I'm not a genuis, but i'm definately not dumb, so selling video games all day is making me a bit depressed. A working day feels like a working week.
Working on my attachment issues in general. Working on how to maintain a healthy relationship with the girl i met two months ago, something i find really hard sometimes. She musn't become a substitute.
meditating every day. Started on fives minutes with major anxiety, now i can sit pretty calmly for about fifteen minutes. I work out three times a week. I look better and feel better. I started a course in project management. I need to get back on track with job level too. The last two years i've been sliding down hill. Now I'm busy from seven am to 11 pm almost every single day. I sleep a sound eight hours a day tough so I can keep on going. Fixing bad karma build up over the years.
Luckely i'm getting my good ol brain back. My memory is returning, my choice of words, my attitude in general. I'm trying to scramble as much of my potential i've wasted over the years back as i can.
Lost contact with.....yeah with all of my friends actually. i just don't have time for them. Need to get myself back on track first. Sometimes i feel lonely, but i have my cat, my parents wich i call every once in a while, and my girlfriend who i see about twice or three times per week a few hours. it's enough for now.
sometimes the weight of real life makes me a bit depressed, but i think this is a phase. Scared of ending up alone, scared of having no-one to talk to etc. etc. I've read a lot of posts here from people who have about the same sobriety time as me, and somehow this depressing phase happens to them as well. I think i'll pass eventually.
I quit drinking coffee and energy drinks about a week ago. For two days i felt like i didn't sleep. Doing a lot better now. Still can't quit smoking sigarettes, but i'm trying to be kind to myself. I allready made a hell of a progress, and i even managed to cut down sigs from about 30 a day (in early recovery) to about 15-20 per day now.
Reading this post i'm actually doing pretty good, altough sometimes it doesn't feel like it. I pray for (still don't now to whom i pray, but i do it now every once in a while) all of you struggling and fighting to become a better person. Altough ur just words on my computer screen....UR THE BEST!!!
I'm still a few hundred in debt, but in about two months or so i'm in the clear. Searching for another job. Desperately. The work i'm doing now was okay as a stoner, but now i'm bored so much every day is a struggle. I'm not a genuis, but i'm definately not dumb, so selling video games all day is making me a bit depressed. A working day feels like a working week.
Working on my attachment issues in general. Working on how to maintain a healthy relationship with the girl i met two months ago, something i find really hard sometimes. She musn't become a substitute.
meditating every day. Started on fives minutes with major anxiety, now i can sit pretty calmly for about fifteen minutes. I work out three times a week. I look better and feel better. I started a course in project management. I need to get back on track with job level too. The last two years i've been sliding down hill. Now I'm busy from seven am to 11 pm almost every single day. I sleep a sound eight hours a day tough so I can keep on going. Fixing bad karma build up over the years.
Luckely i'm getting my good ol brain back. My memory is returning, my choice of words, my attitude in general. I'm trying to scramble as much of my potential i've wasted over the years back as i can.
Lost contact with.....yeah with all of my friends actually. i just don't have time for them. Need to get myself back on track first. Sometimes i feel lonely, but i have my cat, my parents wich i call every once in a while, and my girlfriend who i see about twice or three times per week a few hours. it's enough for now.
sometimes the weight of real life makes me a bit depressed, but i think this is a phase. Scared of ending up alone, scared of having no-one to talk to etc. etc. I've read a lot of posts here from people who have about the same sobriety time as me, and somehow this depressing phase happens to them as well. I think i'll pass eventually.
I quit drinking coffee and energy drinks about a week ago. For two days i felt like i didn't sleep. Doing a lot better now. Still can't quit smoking sigarettes, but i'm trying to be kind to myself. I allready made a hell of a progress, and i even managed to cut down sigs from about 30 a day (in early recovery) to about 15-20 per day now.
Reading this post i'm actually doing pretty good, altough sometimes it doesn't feel like it. I pray for (still don't now to whom i pray, but i do it now every once in a while) all of you struggling and fighting to become a better person. Altough ur just words on my computer screen....UR THE BEST!!!
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,469
It sounds like you're doing great! It sounds like you have a good balance in your life - meditating, exercise and social, and that you're looking to improve your job situation in the long term. Good for you!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 26,425
you are doing well 
if you put in the effort you will get the rewards.
Not the drug and it's actual effects, but facing real life. I'm managing. One day at a time i'm getting back on track.
that was particularly helpful to me today, i am on day 3.....and i do believe that once the physical detox is over, the real challenge is in facing real life.
Thanks for the reminder :ghug3
if you put in the effort you will get the rewards.Not the drug and it's actual effects, but facing real life. I'm managing. One day at a time i'm getting back on track.
that was particularly helpful to me today, i am on day 3.....and i do believe that once the physical detox is over, the real challenge is in facing real life.
Thanks for the reminder :ghug3
Keep it up!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Here, Now
Posts: 4,268
Aren't we a strange but strangely lovable lot. I quit drinking 101 daze ago, which I really picked up after getting clean 23 years ago. Now my little brain says, "hum I wonder what a joint would be like right now? What about if I dropped a little acid and meditated while medicated. Gotta love our little mischievous minds, give them an inch and they take you to the toliet.
If you're in a bad situation, don't worry it'll change. If you're in a good situation, don't worry it'll change. ~John A. Simone, Sr
Namaste to all
If you're in a bad situation, don't worry it'll change. If you're in a good situation, don't worry it'll change. ~John A. Simone, Sr
Namaste to all
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: uk
Posts: 2,548
what a positive post and congratulations.
it is ok to be fearful sometimes right?......learning to deal with life is scary sometimes..especially early on.
i have a friend that is recovery from years of weed addiction.
he found it tough but is currently 2 years clean and he has become a completly different person with far more energy than me!!
its been wonderful to watch my "cant be bothered" mate become someone that embraces life.....
ahhhhhh but the cigs.......the monkey on my back.
like my drinking... im running out of excuses to smoke...30/40 a day.
ive given myself till christmas to be done with it........
it is ok to be fearful sometimes right?......learning to deal with life is scary sometimes..especially early on.
i have a friend that is recovery from years of weed addiction.
he found it tough but is currently 2 years clean and he has become a completly different person with far more energy than me!!
its been wonderful to watch my "cant be bothered" mate become someone that embraces life.....
ahhhhhh but the cigs.......the monkey on my back.
like my drinking... im running out of excuses to smoke...30/40 a day.
ive given myself till christmas to be done with it........
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