May have my answer after visiting this forum
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Well....
An ex-lover of mine ...at my request....took me to an
AA speaker meeting on Foxhall Road N.W-D.C.
Looking around the room...hearing laughter...noticeing how
normal everyone looked ....really surpized me.
A handsome man...Brooks Brothers and styled hair was
the first speaker. Congressman z told the most
horrendous tale of his past secret history with alcohol....
I left at half time..."Geez! I was not that bad"
Caught a cab ...went to a bar....stayed away
from those soo sick people.
3 years later...I was back ..a noon meeting downtown.
Yes indeed....I was then one of the sick people who
required assistance to give up drinking.
For anyone needing support and understanding....
AA is an awesome adventure in living sober.
An ex-lover of mine ...at my request....took me to an
AA speaker meeting on Foxhall Road N.W-D.C.
Looking around the room...hearing laughter...noticeing how
normal everyone looked ....really surpized me.
A handsome man...Brooks Brothers and styled hair was
the first speaker. Congressman z told the most
horrendous tale of his past secret history with alcohol....
I left at half time..."Geez! I was not that bad"
Caught a cab ...went to a bar....stayed away
from those soo sick people.
3 years later...I was back ..a noon meeting downtown.
Yes indeed....I was then one of the sick people who
required assistance to give up drinking.
For anyone needing support and understanding....
AA is an awesome adventure in living sober.
Focus
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Washington DC
Posts: 206
I live with my husband, away from my parents, brother and most of my good friends... 8 hrs away from my hometown. I see them all maybe 3 -4 times/year.
One thing they do know... is how much I like wine.
One thing they don't know... is how it has escalated since I moved here.
I already stated that whenever I drink, I can't stop. I thought before I tried to quit that a wine festival would be great. All the free wine samples you could drink. Imagine my surprise after finding out that they only give you a sip... when I was expecting at least an ounce. Long story short, I went there for the wrong reasons and spent time looking for the tent that gave out the most and sampling every brand that they had to get any sort of eventual buzz.
The 4th of July I was home and lost control over how much I drank... but my family dismissed it as an every now and again thing. Now my brother wants to take me to a wine bar where you can sample and then he said he would treat me. My friend too wants me to come over for drinks (that is easier to say no thanks esp since I will be driving) but the one with my brother is a destination!
How in the world can I do things like this without telling people the truth? I really just wanted to do this alone but when you constantly have drinks being thrown at you... it's hard. Part of the problem with drinking alone without anyone else knowing about it I guess.
One thing they do know... is how much I like wine.
One thing they don't know... is how it has escalated since I moved here.
I already stated that whenever I drink, I can't stop. I thought before I tried to quit that a wine festival would be great. All the free wine samples you could drink. Imagine my surprise after finding out that they only give you a sip... when I was expecting at least an ounce. Long story short, I went there for the wrong reasons and spent time looking for the tent that gave out the most and sampling every brand that they had to get any sort of eventual buzz.
The 4th of July I was home and lost control over how much I drank... but my family dismissed it as an every now and again thing. Now my brother wants to take me to a wine bar where you can sample and then he said he would treat me. My friend too wants me to come over for drinks (that is easier to say no thanks esp since I will be driving) but the one with my brother is a destination!
How in the world can I do things like this without telling people the truth? I really just wanted to do this alone but when you constantly have drinks being thrown at you... it's hard. Part of the problem with drinking alone without anyone else knowing about it I guess.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,502
Yes, I drank alone too, at home.
What I learned is that early sobriety requires making a LOT of changes. I removed a few people from my life immediately. I went to a neighborhood party thinking I could handle it, and I managed to not drinking, but was utterly miserable - so miserable that I went out the next morning and bought wine. Clearly I could not be around alcohol for a long time. I started going out for long walks after supper, every evening and basically changed as much in life as I needed to, in order to stay sober.
What I learned is that early sobriety requires making a LOT of changes. I removed a few people from my life immediately. I went to a neighborhood party thinking I could handle it, and I managed to not drinking, but was utterly miserable - so miserable that I went out the next morning and bought wine. Clearly I could not be around alcohol for a long time. I started going out for long walks after supper, every evening and basically changed as much in life as I needed to, in order to stay sober.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 2,279
What is your plan now & what are you going to do differently next time?
Nothing changes if nothing changes ;-)
Good luck on whichever path you choose
Take Care,
NB
It seems that you are still at the "I am not really sure that I belong here" stage as per your first post.
Nothing changes if nothing changes ;-)
Good luck on whichever path you choose
Take Care,
NB
It seems that you are still at the "I am not really sure that I belong here" stage as per your first post.
Originally Posted by lauraandersen4 
Hey... I'm new to the forum but not really sure if it is for me. I truly don't consider myself an alcoholic. I have always liked wine and that's it. My brother supplies me with a case for free every time I visit my home town. I won't go into anything past the last few years... but stay in the present.
Since dental school started 3 years ago, I have been drinking more heavily. It started out once in a while and I would end up binging with friends only when I went out and never if I was driving. When clinic started, I found myself stressed and drinking every night (3-4 glasses of wine) to relax. I'm to the point where I think about it at school, but I never drink at school. I'm never late, I have control.
I can't wait to get home to have a drink...but it isn't because I need it, it's because I LIKE IT. I like the feeling. It relaxes me. This has been about 6 months now and after repeated times of my friend (online) telling me arguments I had with her that I didn't always fully remember (but parts I did) but that were very very bad, angry and disrespectful. She has cancer and doesn't deserve that. She thinks I have a problem that I don't see. My husband points out that he is used to me drinking at night... I stay coherent though... and that he will lock the door at night etc so I dont forget because I have been drinking. It is insulting but not really impacting my marriage or anything. Sometimes I just have a glass or 2 before he gets home. I'm fully functional and I don't have to have it, I just LIKE it...I never pass out or get so drunk I can't stand etc... but I think about it a lot when I'm not having it ...can't stand the feeling after I'm done when it is wearing off.
My life is not being harmed neither emotionally nor in my relationships. I think I should cut down because no one should have to deal with my crap... but I like wine and am afraid that I may be miserable without it in my life. What do you think?
Thanks -- K
Since dental school started 3 years ago, I have been drinking more heavily. It started out once in a while and I would end up binging with friends only when I went out and never if I was driving. When clinic started, I found myself stressed and drinking every night (3-4 glasses of wine) to relax. I'm to the point where I think about it at school, but I never drink at school. I'm never late, I have control.
I can't wait to get home to have a drink...but it isn't because I need it, it's because I LIKE IT. I like the feeling. It relaxes me. This has been about 6 months now and after repeated times of my friend (online) telling me arguments I had with her that I didn't always fully remember (but parts I did) but that were very very bad, angry and disrespectful. She has cancer and doesn't deserve that. She thinks I have a problem that I don't see. My husband points out that he is used to me drinking at night... I stay coherent though... and that he will lock the door at night etc so I dont forget because I have been drinking. It is insulting but not really impacting my marriage or anything. Sometimes I just have a glass or 2 before he gets home. I'm fully functional and I don't have to have it, I just LIKE it...I never pass out or get so drunk I can't stand etc... but I think about it a lot when I'm not having it ...can't stand the feeling after I'm done when it is wearing off.
My life is not being harmed neither emotionally nor in my relationships. I think I should cut down because no one should have to deal with my crap... but I like wine and am afraid that I may be miserable without it in my life. What do you think?
Thanks -- K
Focus
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Washington DC
Posts: 206
Originally Posted by NewBeginning010
What is your plan now & what are you going to do differently next time?
Nothing changes if nothing changes ;-)
Good luck on whichever path you choose
Take Care,
NB
It seems that you are still at the "I am not really sure that I belong here" stage as per your first post.
Nothing changes if nothing changes ;-)
Good luck on whichever path you choose
Take Care,
NB
It seems that you are still at the "I am not really sure that I belong here" stage as per your first post.
I may have underestimated some of my 'statistics' in my first post that I later clarified. I wanted to hear what I wanted to hear. I think I have a better grasp on it now after seeing that plenty in this forum were exactly where I was when they decided to STOP!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 2,279
Originally Posted by lauraandersen4
I may have underestimated some of my 'statistics' in my first post that I later clarified. I wanted to hear what I wanted to hear. I think I have a better grasp on it now after seeing that plenty in this forum were exactly where I was when they decided to STOP!Maybe I missed it or read incorrectly as I thought you were still drinking now, sorry if this is not the case. (no eye glasses today for me ;-)
That is why I was asking you about your plan to change:
"What is your plan now & what are you going to do differently next time?
Nothing changes if nothing changes ;-)
Good luck on whichever path you choose
Take Care,
NB"
Member
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: East Coast
Posts: 437
Hi Laura,
I feel for you with the decisions but let me tell you the alternative. I progressed and crossed the fine line of things I wouldn't do in a matter of months. I binge drank on weekends but never during work. It happened for a reason and I drank before I came to work. Long story short I was caught on my second time coming to work. I had to go to rehab (which my kids were threatening an intervention anyway). My point is I became that girl and most know of my situation. I was totally ashamed but I don't think I would have been able to stay sober if everyone didn't know. Don't wait for it to get that bad. You can tell everyone that you think you are drinking too much and would rather not drink. I did not start my drinking career until my forties and it lasted about 7 years. I went from a couple of glasses of wine once in a while to drinking all weekend long. I wish I had found something like this site to give me a chance to quit before it got out of hand. Keep posting you are doing great with realizing everything you are thinking. There are alot of good books about alcoholism out there also. I was on an elevator down but I went low but not to the bottom floor. I try to remember that when I think I can drink again.
I feel for you with the decisions but let me tell you the alternative. I progressed and crossed the fine line of things I wouldn't do in a matter of months. I binge drank on weekends but never during work. It happened for a reason and I drank before I came to work. Long story short I was caught on my second time coming to work. I had to go to rehab (which my kids were threatening an intervention anyway). My point is I became that girl and most know of my situation. I was totally ashamed but I don't think I would have been able to stay sober if everyone didn't know. Don't wait for it to get that bad. You can tell everyone that you think you are drinking too much and would rather not drink. I did not start my drinking career until my forties and it lasted about 7 years. I went from a couple of glasses of wine once in a while to drinking all weekend long. I wish I had found something like this site to give me a chance to quit before it got out of hand. Keep posting you are doing great with realizing everything you are thinking. There are alot of good books about alcoholism out there also. I was on an elevator down but I went low but not to the bottom floor. I try to remember that when I think I can drink again.
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