vegibean

While at work I had gone out to smoke a cigarette and noticed I had an ugly scratch and RED paint (huge one at that) on the rear driver's side of my car.

I just went out and had a cigarette and noticed my neighbor who has a RED car has silver (my car is silver) paint on his back bumper, as if he went to back in, scraped up against my car........same exact height...... He hasn't said anything to me and I want to say something to him. My sis just bought me that car and it was in BEAUTIFUL condition when I got it and now it has that ugly mark/dent/paint mark on the side. *SIGH*

I know I should just go upstairs and talk to him but I'm nervous........ I think it's obvious that he tried to hide it as I came home from work and saw him washing his car, that back part of his car but the paint from my car is still on there. The fact that I BELIEVE he's trying to hide it concerns me that I'm going to go up there and talk to him and he's going to deny it.

Any suggestions you guys? Before I go up there? I don't have to go right this minute but I am going up there. My car is a very pretty VW Passat, a gift from my sister and so grateful for it. TIA!!!!

24hrsAday

i almost hate to say it.. but.. consider calling the police if you are concerned he will give you a hard time! the evidence speaks for itself!

vegibean

I did call them and they said that I can file a report. I want to go up there and give the guy a chance.............I just took pictures of both cars with my crappy digi cam and wrote his license number down.

Believe808

I would take a picture of the car w/license plate showing in picture. Pray for direction and words. Don't accuse even if you know for sure, it will put him automatically on the defensive. And then I would file a police report.

vegibean

He called me a c*nt. I tried being nice and that didn't work. D@mn it you guys........what the hell else this week?? Sheesh!!

Believe808

Then you do the next right thing Veg, you call the police to file a report. Once you do that, it will be out of your hands.

Dee74

I have no advice C - bit outside my experience - but I'm really sorry to hear of this other episode in a bad week - ((((Vegi)))))

D

vegibean

Do ya think we could stop with it already? I realize that THIS is not a life or death thing but come on, give me a break, I NEED one!!!

Wolfchild

The "break" you are looking for is the one you need to give yourself.

The result of not giving myself a break when i needed it most, i always took the instant gratification route of escape. i didn't and wouldn't give myself a break because i refused to accept reality just as it was. It seemed as if i was holding Life hostage because it did not measure up to my standard of what should be and what shouldn't be. i slipped further and further into denial and self deception.

Thank God for a fellowship of caring and loving people who were able to gently point out the problems i had suffered with most of my entire life! And it didn't stop there! They helped me, nurtured me, and told me the truth in such a way that it changed my life. i have learned the value in giving myself a break so much that now i freely give others a break when they need it most.

You've gotten great advice and direction with what to do about this situation. Please keep it simple, so that you don't form a resentment, and give your sponsor a call.

vegibean

If you only knew the week I had I think you'd recant some of what you just said. I AM SOBER and have had one hellish week.

My giving him a break was going up to his apartment and giving him the opportunity to do the right thing. What do I need to give myself a break for?

I know you're trying to help but after the week I had, I don't consider it a miracle that I've gotten through the week unscathed. Amazing? Yes, however with all I've been through, picking up has never been, nor is, an option.

Fubarcdn

I would find someone I knew with a good camera and take a good set of photos that prove who is the perp in this act first.
Then I would consider the negatives of calling the police carefully before I made a decision.
He lives in the apartment upstairs right?
Is it in a house or apartment building?
Remember you have to live near this person so I would consider if it is worth the strained relationship that I would be facing.
If I decided that I was going to file a report. First I would write him a letter with an estimate of repair and state that if he doesn't answer it, in writng, within one week stating that he would pay the repair bill that I would have to go to the police and file a report and he could possibly face criminal charges for leaving the scene of an accident.
In my mind I would have to be certain that he would not act out towards me in a violent manner.
It is indeed a tough decision as to what course of action to take.
Good luck Vegi.

suki44883

Vegi, I'm so sorry to hear about this, and congratulations for not picking up during all of this. :ghug3

Something similar happened to me when I lived in an apartment complex. You can call your insurance company and tell them what happened and give them the pictures. You may have coverage to get the damage fixed and then THEY will go after the guy for reimbursement. Of course, that could open up another can of worms that you'd rather not deal with, but it is an option. (((HUGS)))

frstnm

take some pictures

lovinmenow

Hey Veg,
will your insurance company pay for damages even if you don't know who did it? This kind of stuff happens all the time. Call them and tell them what happened.

vegibean

*SIGH* no, I don't have it.

I have insurance but it doesn't cover that. I'm still hoping he'll do the right thing. Even when we were talking to the cop the neighbor was offering to have it buffed out for me. Why would he offer to do that if he didn't hit my car?

I have the pictures. I took them this morning and there is also a police report, called my insurance co. and they called his. We'll see.

Cross your fingers.........