ClosetExtrovert

I spent the better part of 2 years beating myself up about my drinking before I quit. I hope you don't have to do that and that you're ready sooner. Good luck!! I wish you the very best.
xxox

CALYNN

Thanks Taz - I did show up for the first meeting early and was so warmly welcomed I was overwhelmed. Also, after the meeting everyone came up and introduced themselves and offered their help. That's why I'm so frustrated with myself. Maybe I need to go to a couple more meetings before it will sink in. I will give that a try and also try your suggestion about offering to help.

Thanks again,

c

Tazman53

Calynn keep going to meetings as often as you can, it took me some time before I even began to feel comfortable in a meeting. Time takes time, it will come. The more you go the more comfortable you will get with certain people.

I know a guy who never said a word in a meeting for his whole first year sober, trust me you are not alone, some of us just walk into the rooms and run our mouths non-stop, some of us have a hard time even getting a word out.

Please do not get down on your self, know that you are not alone, know that the longer you go without a drink and the more meetings you go to that it will get better and once you start taking the steps with a sponsor as it says in the BB, you will be rocketed into a fourth dimension that you never dreamed was possible.

Please keep in mind this. "It takes time, & time takes time!" We did not hit our bottoms over night, it took us all some time drinking to reach that point, sobriety is the same way.

Newtosoberlivin

are so awesome!!!!! Thank you for that!!! And Calynn (sorry I spelled your name wrong in earlier posts!), hang in there and please update us and let us know how it goes!!!

I will definitely have to post later today and let you all know how my first meeting goes, although I am a bit anxious as it's been a long time. But I know the first step is the hardest and I'm sure once I'm there it will be fine! I'm looking forward to showing my hubby my 24 hour coin!!! And to meeting some nice new folks!!

tyler

I can completely relate to what you are saying. I remember the first meeting I went to. I sat in the parking lot for probablly 10 min before I got the guts to go in. It had already started and I sat there for an hour completely petrified, afraid to even make eye contact with anyone. At the end of the meeting the guy sitting next to me tried to introduce himself and welcome me and I literally bolted out the door to my car!!!

All I can say is it gets easier with time. Don't get frustrated if you don't find a sponsor your first couple of meetings. One thing often recommended is asking someone to be your "temporary sponsor". That seems to be a little less scary for many people. As they tell you, just keep coming back, and don't drink. The rest will work itself out over time. Take care. BTW, it's my day 2 also!!

Charmie

hello new and welcome.nice to meet you.i am a 36 yr old recovering alcoholic woman.drank alcoholicaly for 20yrs and my whole life was one disaster after another.relationships,family,homes,jobs,money,,bla h blah blah.my daughter decided she had had enough four years ago and lives with my sister 400 miles away.that tipped me over the edge and i ended up in a mental ward in the local hospital,,still telling myself things werent that bad (everyone in there was worse than me!!!!). i went to AA for a short period of time and of course thought i was cured,,then ensued another four years on unmanagability,,walked out of or lost jobs,promiscuity behind a very dear mans back,brawling in the street,awful reputation in small village i live in.now,,to feb 6th this year.i had my last drink.decided like you have enough is enough,but meant business this time.i was sick of being sick.i made a choice,i didnt want to be the hopeless alcoholic i had resigned myself to being,,,so AA here we come.ive worked hard since then,i got a sponsor pretty quickly but asked for guidance on this from the man upstairs,i didnt want to just jump on the first lady available,this was life or death.when the pupil is ready the teacher will appear,,and she did.since i went back to AA at first i went to a meeting nearly everyday,i got phone numbers and used them,its like they say,make AA contact 2 or 3 times a day and this will help you to keep sober.i get on my knees every morning and every night,i say thank you first,pray for others and then ask for direction.i spend alot of time on here reading stuff about the big book and how others have managed to maintain sobriety.i bake cakes for the meetings.i wash up at a couple of them.i make sure i always treat folk nice.most importantly i am working the 12 steps.i am just on 9 which is making amends.i have made 4 so far and it is like they say,,beyond my wildest dreams,i can see that archway to freedom just ahead,its within my grasp,but for the Grace of God of my understanding,the fellowship of AA and the 12 step programme,and good old fashioned sponsorship.my family is also grateful for all of this.i now have a great relationship with my daughter (nearly 17) and other folk aorund me,they want to know me.i have turned green fingered and like nothing better than being among my flowers,that i have grown,fresh coffee in the morning and not grabbing for a bottle and starting the horrific treadmill all over again,,simple but perfect.me and the bf are going for a months tour round america next week and staying with folk i have met on sr that are also in the fellowship! WOW! if someone had told me 6 months ago what things would be like now i would have laughed in their face,,not now,,i laugh with them.i wish you all the very best,sounds good eh?? you can have it too.:praying

Tazman53

Fear of the great unknown runs rampant for every body, alcoholic or not!

Remember that first day of school? The first day of HS was the worst I heard rumors that the seniors ate freshman!!!!

Charmain thanks for that AWESOME share, it brought tears of joy to this old alkies eyes.

Charmie

it brings tears of joy to my eyes at least several times a day taz,,,miracle.:ghug

Tazman53

One of the greatest gifts I have gotten from the steps, my emotions back and the ability to know when some one in recovery says the miracle happens what they are talking about and feeling, the miracle happened about 2 years ago for me and I am still amazed that it could have ever happened for me.

CALYNN

Hi - I just wanted to thank everyone for their support and suggestions. I finally called and asked for a sponsor this morning. We had a great conversation and I'm feeling really good about going forward. We're going to meet for dinner Monday evening and then go to a meeting afterwards. Her story is a lot like mine, so that helped a lot too. She even offered to pick me up so I wouldn't have to go into the meeting alone - so sweet.

Anyway, thanks again everyone and I'll let you know how things progress.

Hugs,

c

Charmie

brilliant calynn! im real pleased,keep us posted and let us know how you get on with your sponsor!