Im back AGAIN
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Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 118
Originally Posted by optra 
Hello and welcome. My wife telling me to leave was the final straw. Althouh my first thought was "Great! now I can drink without anyone to nag about it", I realized that that decision would only lead to continued loss until there was nothing left but the bottle and death. I decided instead to give AA a shot. Nine months later I can't believe how much better I feel.
All the best to you.
All the best to you.
13 days of sobriety now, and I feel good about that. Nothing to do now but look ahead and do what little I can to repair the damage.
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Wow I know I am far from being unique, I am in reality just a common garden variety alcoholic but to see 2 people, Surviveit & Optra bottoms are almost identical to mine!!!
My wife told me her & the kids had a place and were moving out at the end of the month. I thought the same thing, "Cool, I can drink all I want now!" Then as I was drinking the rest of the evening I too saw that in reality I was drinking myself to the lose of it all and a slow death.
Spen do not let the booze talk you into not going to that meeting, do not let one person on the phone keep you from finding a life long solution to your problem.
My wife told me her & the kids had a place and were moving out at the end of the month. I thought the same thing, "Cool, I can drink all I want now!" Then as I was drinking the rest of the evening I too saw that in reality I was drinking myself to the lose of it all and a slow death.
Spen do not let the booze talk you into not going to that meeting, do not let one person on the phone keep you from finding a life long solution to your problem.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Birmingham, England
Posts: 665
Originally Posted by SurviveIt
Similar story here. I can't believe how stupid and selfish I was.
13 days of sobriety now, and I feel good about that. Nothing to do now but look ahead and do what little I can to repair the damage.
13 days of sobriety now, and I feel good about that. Nothing to do now but look ahead and do what little I can to repair the damage.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Birmingham, England
Posts: 665
Bump.
Well after going the whole of June and July without a drink I thought I would be ok to have a couple when on a short break with the family. Worse thing I have ever done, things have just gone really bad in my family life, so im back on day one again and this time I am going to find the strength never to have a drink again. I am not able to control my drinking so that is it no more.
Well after going the whole of June and July without a drink I thought I would be ok to have a couple when on a short break with the family. Worse thing I have ever done, things have just gone really bad in my family life, so im back on day one again and this time I am going to find the strength never to have a drink again. I am not able to control my drinking so that is it no more.
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
So spen what did you do to stay sober that length of time?
Did you quit doing it?
What are you going to do now?
You already know what does not work, perhaps it is time to try something new, something you were not wanting to do before to stay sober.
Did you quit doing it?
What are you going to do now?
You already know what does not work, perhaps it is time to try something new, something you were not wanting to do before to stay sober.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 3,095
Hi Spen,
I'm an alcoholic, and I know that I can't ever drink safely. I react in a strange way when I drink; I want MORE. That wanting more feeling doesn't end until I'm physically without booze for a while.
But then without booze, I'm grumpy and bored (restless, irritable, and discontent), and I have the delusion that a drink will make me feel better. I obsess over it because I want that feeling again that life can't seem to give me. So I always did exactly what AA's Big Book talks about.
In order to see past that delusion, I had to have some kind of mental shift that let me see the truth about my drinking. I had to have a psychic change or a spiritual experience. Taking AA's 12 steps brought about that change for me, and my life produced that feeling I could never really get again from booze. It took on new meaning.
I'm an alcoholic, and I know that I can't ever drink safely. I react in a strange way when I drink; I want MORE. That wanting more feeling doesn't end until I'm physically without booze for a while.
But then without booze, I'm grumpy and bored (restless, irritable, and discontent), and I have the delusion that a drink will make me feel better. I obsess over it because I want that feeling again that life can't seem to give me. So I always did exactly what AA's Big Book talks about.
Originally Posted by AA Big Book 1st Ed.
After they have succumbed to the desire again, as so many do, and the phenomenon of craving develops, they pass through the well-known stages of a spree, emerging remorseful, with a firm resolution not to drink again. This is repeated over and over, and unless this person can experience an entire psychic change there is very little hope of his recovery.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Birmingham, England
Posts: 665
Originally Posted by Tazman53
So spen what did you do to stay sober that length of time?
Did you quit doing it?
What are you going to do now?
You already know what does not work, perhaps it is time to try something new, something you were not wanting to do before to stay sober.
Did you quit doing it?
What are you going to do now?
You already know what does not work, perhaps it is time to try something new, something you were not wanting to do before to stay sober.
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Spen I did not feel like I "fit" in at some of the AA meetings I went to, but I wanted to stay sober more then anything, I knew that millions of alcoholics have found sobriety through AA so I kept going to different meetings until I fouind a group of them I did like.
I did not want to continue to be a drunk. Funny thing, but the longer I stayed sober, the more meetings I went to the more I felt like I belonged. Heck some of the meetings I hated when I was in early sobriety I went back to and much to my amazement they were actually great meetings. It turned out the meetings had not changed, I had.
I did not want to continue to be a drunk. Funny thing, but the longer I stayed sober, the more meetings I went to the more I felt like I belonged. Heck some of the meetings I hated when I was in early sobriety I went back to and much to my amazement they were actually great meetings. It turned out the meetings had not changed, I had.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,313
Welcome back Spen.
I think it's important to have a plan - keeping busy is not always enough cos sometimes we're not busy.
SR was great for me with suggestions when I didn't really know where to go next....I hope it helps you too
D
I think it's important to have a plan - keeping busy is not always enough cos sometimes we're not busy.
SR was great for me with suggestions when I didn't really know where to go next....I hope it helps you too
D
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 26,425
glad you are here spen (hug)
Yeah, i'm back after drinking as well...end of week 4...what i'm doing is remembering what worked and utilizing that..but also looking real hard at what worked short term and then seemed to not be helping...at times in my life using the work 24-7 thing helped me but then it turned on me and harmed my sobriety instead of supporting it. Some meetings helped at sometimes and then were actually harmful at other points...
I guess i'm figuring i have to be pretty flexable and pay close attention. When i do see something that seems to be turning me mental..well that is for me a step toward a drink and i have to either change inside or change the outside to be more supportive of my sobriety and sanity.
anyhow....i'm doing the step 1 don't drink no matter what, step 2 change thing for now....
Keep us posted ok
Yeah, i'm back after drinking as well...end of week 4...what i'm doing is remembering what worked and utilizing that..but also looking real hard at what worked short term and then seemed to not be helping...at times in my life using the work 24-7 thing helped me but then it turned on me and harmed my sobriety instead of supporting it. Some meetings helped at sometimes and then were actually harmful at other points...
I guess i'm figuring i have to be pretty flexable and pay close attention. When i do see something that seems to be turning me mental..well that is for me a step toward a drink and i have to either change inside or change the outside to be more supportive of my sobriety and sanity.
anyhow....i'm doing the step 1 don't drink no matter what, step 2 change thing for now....
Keep us posted ok
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Birmingham, England
Posts: 665
Well on to day 4 and so far so good. No withdrawals what I can say were uncomfortable. Sleeping ok well apart from a two year old daughter deciding 1am was a good time to get up. All I need to do now is to get over my dodgy ankle and then get out and about more.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Birmingham, England
Posts: 665
Well through the first weekend. Worked a lot even with my dodgy ankle and I seem to be sleeping a lot and waking up still tired.
I have been trying to mend some seriously broken bridges with my other half. This time last week she wanted me out but things seem to be a bit better and my two young daughters always come to me more when I am not drinking so that is a major reason NOT to drink again.
My Bro-in-Law and Sis-in-Law come over and the atmosphere did not seem to bad. Next one is my family but I am going to leave that for a couple of weeks.
I have been trying to mend some seriously broken bridges with my other half. This time last week she wanted me out but things seem to be a bit better and my two young daughters always come to me more when I am not drinking so that is a major reason NOT to drink again.
My Bro-in-Law and Sis-in-Law come over and the atmosphere did not seem to bad. Next one is my family but I am going to leave that for a couple of weeks.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Birmingham, England
Posts: 665
well here I am on day 9 and feeling good. Sleeping well and feeling well. no anxiety or stress so far which I am pleased with. I am thinking that this is maybe to do with the positive attitude I have.
It is the second weekend coming up which has always been on my downfall. Start on the Friday night with 6 cans then I would just carry on. So finger crossed I will get throught this again.
YNWA
It is the second weekend coming up which has always been on my downfall. Start on the Friday night with 6 cans then I would just carry on. So finger crossed I will get throught this again.
YNWA
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