Mark75

It's been 7.5 months... First time out with friends...Tonight we are meeting a couple (he's been a friend of mine for 35 years, high school) for dinner. Many of my more spectacular marathon adventures in mind altering states have been with him. He may have his own issues with isms... actually he does, and he actively explores them. We do have other things in common, cycling, skiing, outdoor stuff, but it's always been about the drinking at some point....

We are all adults, they will be thrilled to see us... But I'm anxious, not that I'll drink, that won't happen... but I am afraid I'll be miserable. They know about the intervention, rehab, etc... They were told for reasons I don't approve of, but it was during my stay at "Club M" I think I feel a little humiliated....I don't even know how I'm going to relate to them, I guess I'll find out!!

Just sharing my anxiety with my SR family. Wish me luck!!

Mark

coffeenut

I think this falls under the heading of 'worrying about something that may not happen'....? If he is a buddy like you say he is, I'll bet if it does come up, you'll find some support and then you'll start talking about something else.

Oh...and I think you're going to surprise yourself on what a great time you will have. I really do. He will probably be more proud of you....than you are!

flutter

oof.. that does sound tough, especially if you were 'outed' in a way that wasn't fair.

I'll wish ya luck, and hope it speeds by and you get home and got "whew.." safe and sound

Believe808

If they are friends, they will understand. I have been with friends since getting sober and believe it or not, my good friends really understood. They were totally happy that I got help and was sober and admitted that they worried about me when I was using. Go and have a good time.

Mattcake

Try to relax and enjoy yourself, Mark It's nothing to be ashamed of. I hope your friends will be supportive. Have a great dinner.

Hevyn

Mark, I had a similar situation a few mos. after I quit. I was afraid I'd be miserable too. The strange feeling was only in the beginning of the evening. Once I got past the ordering of drinks thing (I had 7-up) I actually enjoyed being coherent during our conversations. I did feel a longing for the old days - just a bit - but kept telling myself drinking was never fun anymore, & reminding myself how the night would end if I caved - I'd be hungover the next day, and probably off on one of my famous binges. You say you're not tempted to drink, and that's wonderful. Hold your head high, smile, & look them straight in the eye and let them see what a fantastic job you've done getting yourself well. It takes strength and courage to own up to what we've done to ourselves and then take action. There's nothing to be humiliated about. Hope you have a great time, and this experience will make you that much stronger.

Mark75

Thanks guys! Really... Your comments helped a lot....I'll log on tonight and let you know how it went!

Anna

Mark,

You might be surprised and things will go smoothly tonight!

Toomutch

I have a feeling your friend is going to give you a great big burly man hug and tell you how proud of you he is... in guy lingo that is.

Tommyh

sounds like a plan mark
enjoy!

Rusty Zipper

cub, you might be just pleasantly surprised!

Mark75

Pretty much what happened!! It went great... I had no self pity, couldn't care less that he was drinking a beer... Heck, I had a better time than I've had in years of dinner dates with them!!

This was a milestone... I did not feel that I was missing out, or that something was missing. I was as much a part of things, if not more...

I've heard it said many times "in the rooms" ... "I don't have to drink anymore"... On one level, I've taken it as... I don't crave a drink... but, as with so many other seemingly simple phrases you hear... it also means, I don't have to drink.... to feel whole,... to be a part of life,... I don't have to drink to have a good time...

So for those of you in early sobriety that just can't imagine a life without a drink... imagine it... it happens!

I don't hold out any unrealistic expectations... I'm sure there will be times when I feel a pang or two, but just knowing that I can go into a bistro and have a great time over dinner, sans drinks, leaves me with serenity tonight.

So... if this is a pink cloud, I plan to enjoy it...

Thanx again all!!

Mark

Mary52

I'm glad it went well for you!

least

I'm glad you had a good time and that none of your 'worrying' expectations came to pass. Sobriety really rocks!