Hello everyone. I am new here )
Member
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: SE and then South some more
Posts: 2,648
Hey Path. So glad you're here. Keep coming back. This site is great for support and sharing and you'll get tons of feedback after everyone is done "welcoming" you. Hee hee......
Good luck on your journey.
Good luck on your journey.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Sacramento
Posts: 11
Hello again everyone. Chipotle for dinner d'oh...had a craving for one or the other of my vices went with that one..
My detox symptoms are still here but I have added the shaking on top of it. I am really wanting a drink to make these symptoms go away, it's hard shaking the hands of prominent members of our business with such clamy hands, and the subsequent look of 'whoa' on top of the shaking while I write and type in front of anyone, and so it's leaning on me.
My wife and I see a marriage counselor tonight, and the big concern she has is my drinking and my big concern is the reason why I was/am drinking..... should be an interesting time given that I got into it with the last counselor after she started getting on me about my interpretation of the AA meetings I was going to, instead of listening like she is supposed to, she put a bias....but there are many people to see, so on to the next we go.
Safe travels to all )
Sober...ish
My detox symptoms are still here but I have added the shaking on top of it. I am really wanting a drink to make these symptoms go away, it's hard shaking the hands of prominent members of our business with such clamy hands, and the subsequent look of 'whoa' on top of the shaking while I write and type in front of anyone, and so it's leaning on me.
My wife and I see a marriage counselor tonight, and the big concern she has is my drinking and my big concern is the reason why I was/am drinking..... should be an interesting time given that I got into it with the last counselor after she started getting on me about my interpretation of the AA meetings I was going to, instead of listening like she is supposed to, she put a bias....but there are many people to see, so on to the next we go.
Safe travels to all )
Sober...ish
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: San Rafael CA
Posts: 36
You have so many great steps ahead in the next few months! I am excited to hear about the Baby once they are here and how it is to hold them with steady hands and look at them with eyes that won't forget! I am excited for you keep us in the loop!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Sacramento
Posts: 11
Hello again everyone. Counseling went well for us I think, both my wife and I really enjoy the person, and is a complete 180 from the first lady. I did however last night slip and had 2 drinks 
perhaps I need to ween myself away instead of trying to stop cold turkey, but I am not sure how that helps with a detox process, as I lack all physical symptoms, and don't have any cravings to speak of. Anyone have any thoughts on weening by reducing the amount by half each night?
I went to an outpatient assessment program, and after just a barrage of questions on everything and then some the person I ended up with came to the conclusion that I don't need out patient, and that I would be better off with group sessions (to me read:this forum) to which I agree, and my wife is happy with that outcome.
Safe travels everyone )
Sobered (in reset mode)
perhaps I need to ween myself away instead of trying to stop cold turkey, but I am not sure how that helps with a detox process, as I lack all physical symptoms, and don't have any cravings to speak of. Anyone have any thoughts on weening by reducing the amount by half each night?I went to an outpatient assessment program, and after just a barrage of questions on everything and then some the person I ended up with came to the conclusion that I don't need out patient, and that I would be better off with group sessions (to me read:this forum) to which I agree, and my wife is happy with that outcome.
Safe travels everyone )
Sobered (in reset mode)
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Sacramento
Posts: 11
Hello again everyone. I have failed again. Couple beers down and my resistance for more is weakened. I am the type that if I have enough...there is no end in sight. I am at that point now...I want more, luckily there is nothing left in the house. I can make it through this... I know I can...wife is home in 10 minutes....that helps ))
My update.
Path
My update.
Path
Member
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Middle TN
Posts: 94
Originally Posted by ThePath2Sober 
Anyone have any thoughts on weening by reducing the amount by half each night?
Good luck,
Lynx
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Ottawa,Ontario
Posts: 55
Welcome to our group :ghug3 I know how hard it is to actually quit ,and you have made some serious steps by joining us.One thing though I would recommend is that you read about how people feel who are not an addict but the friend/family of one.When I quit reading and understanding other's people's pain helped me.Remember to take it one day at a time and things do get easier after awhile. I haven't craved one for quite a while now.You are on your way by just accepting you "may" have a problem.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Sacramento
Posts: 11
Originally Posted by Lynxster
Yea, IMHO that is your AV "Addictive Voice" (that little voice that always tells you that you can have a few and stop this time), your AV will pretty much tell you anything it can to get you to take that first drink. The only thing that works for me is complete abstinence, if I had tried to "ween" myself off (as logical as that sounds), I would end up trashed. I can control not taking the first drink, but if I decided to have just 1, my AV will say "Hell Lynx, if you're gonna drink you might as well have a couple more so you can at least start to feel good". Of course after a couple more the party's on!
Good luck, Lynx
Good luck,
Lynx
So I feel I am on the right path, and getting to the core issue and getting that resolved is going to make getting back to sober a lot easier, and so far...it is.
my thoughts for today.
path
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 3,095
Hope that works for you.
I, too, was not interested in a spiritual solution until I had tried and failed at every imaginable other way of staying sober. My first arrest was also a domestic incident (meaning I grabbed my wife around the throat while pinning her down on the floor). After that, I was pretty motivated to do something about my drinking, and tried hard to control it.
Long story short, after many years and many additional arrests, and many failed attempts at staying sober, I accepted I was powerless over alcohol and a spiritual solution was the only hope. If you are an alcoholic, and you may not be, you may find the same truth I did and seek a spiritual solution.
Hope your journey doesn't require the years of pain and damage mine did, but they often do.
I, too, was not interested in a spiritual solution until I had tried and failed at every imaginable other way of staying sober. My first arrest was also a domestic incident (meaning I grabbed my wife around the throat while pinning her down on the floor). After that, I was pretty motivated to do something about my drinking, and tried hard to control it.
Long story short, after many years and many additional arrests, and many failed attempts at staying sober, I accepted I was powerless over alcohol and a spiritual solution was the only hope. If you are an alcoholic, and you may not be, you may find the same truth I did and seek a spiritual solution.
Hope your journey doesn't require the years of pain and damage mine did, but they often do.
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Keep in mind that once you are finished detoxing you never ever have to do it again........... unless of course you want to!!
Trust me it does get better.
BTW you mentioned you and your marriage councelor got into over AA & the God deal, perhaps you may want to ask questions about AA and listen instead of argueing about it.
You might learn that AA is chock full of agnostics with a sprinkling of aethiest. I have heard more then one agnostic use the word God rather then saying Higher Power of my understanding simply because it is easier and quicker to say.
I bet you did not know there is an entire chapter in the book Alcoholics Anonymous titled "We Agnostics"!! Notice I bolded the word We! Could it be that there were agnostics in AA all the way back in the 1930s?
Have you read the book or are you letting alcohol tell you what it says? Have you sat down one on one with an AA person and asked questions about the program of AA or are you letting alcohol tell you about it.
Look the reason I am asking these questions is because I felt just like you when I was drinking, alcohol did my thinking for me and blinded me to everything that could help me, I had to be shown my own death from alcoholism before I was finally able to LISTEN and not tell others about a solution to alcoholism. I had to hit hard enough to open my mind and give things a chance even when alcohol was telling me "That is not for you!"
Trust me it does get better.
BTW you mentioned you and your marriage councelor got into over AA & the God deal, perhaps you may want to ask questions about AA and listen instead of argueing about it.
You might learn that AA is chock full of agnostics with a sprinkling of aethiest. I have heard more then one agnostic use the word God rather then saying Higher Power of my understanding simply because it is easier and quicker to say.
I bet you did not know there is an entire chapter in the book Alcoholics Anonymous titled "We Agnostics"!! Notice I bolded the word We! Could it be that there were agnostics in AA all the way back in the 1930s?
Have you read the book or are you letting alcohol tell you what it says? Have you sat down one on one with an AA person and asked questions about the program of AA or are you letting alcohol tell you about it.
Look the reason I am asking these questions is because I felt just like you when I was drinking, alcohol did my thinking for me and blinded me to everything that could help me, I had to be shown my own death from alcoholism before I was finally able to LISTEN and not tell others about a solution to alcoholism. I had to hit hard enough to open my mind and give things a chance even when alcohol was telling me "That is not for you!"
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 3,095
As a fairly devout atheist, the chapter Taz mentioned did a lot for me when I started to recover.
"But it isn't so difficult. About half our original fellowship were of exactly that type. At first some of us tried to avoid the issue, hoping against hope we were not true alcoholics. But after a while we had to face the fact that we must find a spiritual basis of life —or else. Perhaps it is going to be that way with you. But cheer up, something like half of us thought we were atheists or agnostics. Our experience shows that you need not be disconcerted."
Chapter 4--AA Big Book
"But it isn't so difficult. About half our original fellowship were of exactly that type. At first some of us tried to avoid the issue, hoping against hope we were not true alcoholics. But after a while we had to face the fact that we must find a spiritual basis of life —or else. Perhaps it is going to be that way with you. But cheer up, something like half of us thought we were atheists or agnostics. Our experience shows that you need not be disconcerted."
Chapter 4--AA Big Book
Hollyce Jones
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: The Golden State of California
Posts: 77
Welcome to SR
ThePath2Sober,
As many have probably already said, you'll find a TON of support here.
I relate to you with regards to your comment on the "church" feeling of AA. AA is not for everyone. Maybe, if you are still interested in going to meetings, Life Ring will be a better choice for you.
HUGS
Wishing you peace, clarity, and inspiration to make your life what you REALLY want it to be.
Hollyce
As many have probably already said, you'll find a TON of support here.
I relate to you with regards to your comment on the "church" feeling of AA. AA is not for everyone. Maybe, if you are still interested in going to meetings, Life Ring will be a better choice for you.
HUGS
Wishing you peace, clarity, and inspiration to make your life what you REALLY want it to be.
Hollyce
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Sacramento
Posts: 11
Originally Posted by Tazman53
Keep in mind that once you are finished detoxing you never ever have to do it again........... unless of course you want to!!
Trust me it does get better.
BTW you mentioned you and your marriage councelor got into over AA & the God deal, perhaps you may want to ask questions about AA and listen instead of argueing about it.
You might learn that AA is chock full of agnostics with a sprinkling of aethiest. I have heard more then one agnostic use the word God rather then saying Higher Power of my understanding simply because it is easier and quicker to say.
I bet you did not know there is an entire chapter in the book Alcoholics Anonymous titled "We Agnostics"!! Notice I bolded the word We! Could it be that there were agnostics in AA all the way back in the 1930s?
Have you read the book or are you letting alcohol tell you what it says? Have you sat down one on one with an AA person and asked questions about the program of AA or are you letting alcohol tell you about it.
Look the reason I am asking these questions is because I felt just like you when I was drinking, alcohol did my thinking for me and blinded me to everything that could help me, I had to be shown my own death from alcoholism before I was finally able to LISTEN and not tell others about a solution to alcoholism. I had to hit hard enough to open my mind and give things a chance even when alcohol was telling me "That is not for you!"
Trust me it does get better.
BTW you mentioned you and your marriage councelor got into over AA & the God deal, perhaps you may want to ask questions about AA and listen instead of argueing about it.
You might learn that AA is chock full of agnostics with a sprinkling of aethiest. I have heard more then one agnostic use the word God rather then saying Higher Power of my understanding simply because it is easier and quicker to say.
I bet you did not know there is an entire chapter in the book Alcoholics Anonymous titled "We Agnostics"!! Notice I bolded the word We! Could it be that there were agnostics in AA all the way back in the 1930s?
Have you read the book or are you letting alcohol tell you what it says? Have you sat down one on one with an AA person and asked questions about the program of AA or are you letting alcohol tell you about it.
Look the reason I am asking these questions is because I felt just like you when I was drinking, alcohol did my thinking for me and blinded me to everything that could help me, I had to be shown my own death from alcoholism before I was finally able to LISTEN and not tell others about a solution to alcoholism. I had to hit hard enough to open my mind and give things a chance even when alcohol was telling me "That is not for you!"
I have gone to 4 different AA chapters in my area as it was mentioned to me that it is best to find a group that you are most comfortable with and you will do better. I did have several one on one conversations with people and asked questions related to it, and I skimmed through the book to be honest. I settled down with people from "Secular Organizations for Sobriety" who have a local chapter nearby to me, and so far have been the most comfortable with them.
And no, once is enough for detox
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Sacramento
Posts: 11
Hello again everyone!
Well here I am on Day 3 already. It was a very good weekend.
The detox period for me physically was rather quick, had some serious shakes and sweating the morning of day 1, with that slowly subsiding by the evening, didn't have any insomnia like in the past, and the following day I felt back to normal. I was really surprised! Mentally I am sound, and the checks I have now in place are really helping (no thing to have in the house, keys taken at night by my wife if she leaves with our son (too far to bike) and so far there has only been a slight mental urge when I drove past the store last night from work, but other then that no real cravings. My SOS group goes well too, good conversations!
The only thing going on now is I am gaining weight, and I don't know why as my diet hasn't changed (other then I am not consuming 1000+ empty calories a night) but other then that, no other physical effects thus far.
Thank you all for your support this far and I will be checking back daily to let you all know my progress as I continue on 'thepath2sober'
-path )
Well here I am on Day 3 already. It was a very good weekend.
The detox period for me physically was rather quick, had some serious shakes and sweating the morning of day 1, with that slowly subsiding by the evening, didn't have any insomnia like in the past, and the following day I felt back to normal. I was really surprised! Mentally I am sound, and the checks I have now in place are really helping (no thing to have in the house, keys taken at night by my wife if she leaves with our son (too far to bike) and so far there has only been a slight mental urge when I drove past the store last night from work, but other then that no real cravings. My SOS group goes well too, good conversations!
The only thing going on now is I am gaining weight, and I don't know why as my diet hasn't changed (other then I am not consuming 1000+ empty calories a night) but other then that, no other physical effects thus far.
Thank you all for your support this far and I will be checking back daily to let you all know my progress as I continue on 'thepath2sober'
-path )
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Virginia
Posts: 818
I'll get into it with your interpretation of AA meetings, too. AA is not, and I repeat not, a "church thing" nor is it a religious thing. It is, however, a spititual thing in that we believe in a higher power than ourselves. And as you're such a free thinker and a spiritual person, what's the problem? Spirituality is merely an individual's personal relationship with his or her higher power. Don't get yourself so wrapped around the axle about this point that you completely miss the whole point of the AA program. It seems as if you're looking for any excuse not to try it. If this other group is helping you, then that's great! AA doesn't work for everyone. But you should thoroughly understand the program and not just "skim the book" before you condemn it. And I can sympathize with your problem with the first marraige counselor. I had a similar one.
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