Intensive First Step
 

Has anyone done a really intensive first step that involves a lot of writing, almost Step 4 style?

When I was in outpatient rehab, we had these worksheets, with things like “Give examples of blackouts,” “Give examples of the ways that you violated your moral or ethical values for drinking,” basically a way to make us write down the ways in which our lives had become unmanageable.

Since I’m not a first time winner, I’m back to step one, and I’ve found some worksheets on Step One online, so I’m trying to go through all the questions, just for myself, as a way to detail the way alcohol completely turned my life upside down and made so many things unmanageable.

It’s emotionally draining. I’ve done a fourth step before and this is actually much, much harder. I can’t even get through any of the worksheets at one time – I can do maybe two questions before the cringeworthyness of the details I’m writing down make me need to stop. I’m going to complete them, but it is slow going.

Anyone else ever done this?

I did a very intense 1st step worksheet in rehab - sounds sort of like the one you are talking about...

For me, they were draining but sort of liberating too... also helped me deal with the fact that I was where I needed to be.

Mark