The real work starts at 4 months? - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
Go Back   SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information >
Register Blogs FAQ Members List Calendar Arcade Mark Forums Read





Reply
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 04-05-2009, 07:59 AM   #1 (permalink)
A new dawn and new chapter
 
Bard's Avatar
 

Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Kansas City, Missouri
Posts: 298
Blog Entries: 27

The real work starts at 4 months?


Today marks 16 weeks for me and I'm pretty proud that I've made it this far. The first 2 months were my worst. That was the point I was seriously thinking I was losing my mind. 3rd month was better but still a good handful of snags in the road. But it seems lately I'm feeling much more better and stable upstairs in the old noggin. But with it some very intense and I mean INTENSE! desires to drink again have resurfaced. Honestly for the first 3 months I had little desire to drink. Any craving that popped up I quickly shot down. But the last 2 days I was battling some fierce cravings. Friday being the worse, I even grabbed my keys and wallet and was ready to fly out the door. but I kept pacing around the house telling myself that I didn't really want to do it and reminding myself over and over again of that nightmare world I just left behind an how hard of a road it was to get to where I am now. Finally I found some housework to do and peddled on my bike to keep me sidetracked and after that it quiet down to a dull roar in my mind. But yesterday when I woke up it was waiting for me all over again. Again luckily I was able to keep myself distracted enough and made it through.

It was all pretty freaky, 3 months of almost nothing then suddenly two back to back days of heavy cravings. I was getting pretty confident in myself thinking that it was going to be a easy road from here on out. Instead now that I'm feeling much better it seems like the real work is beginning!
Bard is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-05-2009, 08:27 AM   #2 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: CA desert
Posts: 1,599
Hey Bard,

Just having some coffee and reading here. It doesn't get better, so I'm glad you are sticking to your guns. I admire your ability to recognize the temptations and push them aside. It is always a one-day-at-a-time kinda thing, that part never changes. Even with multiple years, people go back to the misery, so you're doing great by posting here instead of giving in. Thanks for inspiring me today.
__________________
Today is a clean slate. What happened yesterday is gone, what happens today depends on me.

Reach for the stars, but keep a ladder handy just in case you've got to climb a bit.
firestorm090 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-05-2009, 08:34 AM   #3 (permalink)
Administrator
 
Anna's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 51,263
Hi,

I'm so glad you made it through those cravings. You're doing great and congratulations on 4 months sober!

I'm not sure that recovery ever gets easy, but it does get easier, and the benefits pay off enormously.

I would ask you what other changes have you made in your life, besides stopping drinking? For me, I had to get involved in different activities, get back to daily exercise, that kind of thing.
__________________
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.

Marianne Williamson
Anna is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-05-2009, 08:40 AM   #4 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: brandon man, canada
Posts: 258
Good morning there.I was reading what you had to say and i myself have been where you have been the 4th month may seem easy and it may for a time i think god tests us from time to time to see if we are really working the program of A.A and sees that we do.When you are in trouble and thinking of picking up that bottle keep doing what your doing and maybe get a sponser and talk to them they can help you out of your head in get it back on track.
dave is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-05-2009, 08:43 AM   #5 (permalink)
Learning to live again
 
Hevyn's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: New York - Catskill Mtns.
Posts: 37,641
Bard, I agree with you on this. In the first couple months I was so thankful to be sober, so terrified about my last binge, that the thought of drinking just made me sick. When I started to feel healthier, the old way of thinking returned. I started thinking, "I'd never overdo it again, not after what I've been through - I'll just have a few." Then I'd remind myself that I was never able to hold it down to just a few and it always resulted in another binge of terrifying proportions. Next time I might not make it back. Thanks for sharing these helpful thoughts.
Hevyn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-05-2009, 08:45 AM   #6 (permalink)
6/20/08
 

Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 4,467
I think the real work starts the second you quit. Seriously.

I've only had a couple of 'craving moments'. And for me, it was when I was thinking, 'oh man, just one sounds good'. After I slapped myself back to reality, the craving left.

A huge congrats on four months. That is awesome!
__________________
Choices, Chances, Changes.
coffeenut is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-05-2009, 09:18 AM   #7 (permalink)
Looking For Myself...Sober
 
Aysha's Avatar
 

Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Where the heart is
Posts: 10,210
Blog Entries: 26
Congrats on 4 mos.
You made it through those fierce cravings. You can keep doin it.
I am glad you did. I dont have any advice. Just wanted to say congrats and you can do it.
__________________
Dont just count your days...Make your days count!


It may not get easier, But it will get better.
Aysha is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-05-2009, 09:19 AM   #8 (permalink)
A new dawn and new chapter
 
Bard's Avatar
 

Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Kansas City, Missouri
Posts: 298
Blog Entries: 27
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hevyn View Post
Bard, I agree with you on this. In the first couple months I was so thankful to be sober, so terrified about my last binge, that the thought of drinking just made me sick. When I started to feel healthier, the old way of thinking returned. I started thinking, "I'd never overdo it again, not after what I've been through - I'll just have a few." Then I'd remind myself that I was never able to hold it down to just a few and it always resulted in another binge of terrifying proportions. Next time I might not make it back. Thanks for sharing these helpful thoughts.

That's what it was like for me late summer and all the way through October was just nothing but drinking one day after another. And by the time November rolled in I was so burnt out and sick from it that I didin't want to drink most days but I kept on forcing it down anyway. Finally I had enough on the day you see in my sig and for a while just the thought of drinking was enough to make me feel nauseous! It seems like now though that my body and mind are much more healthier the old feelings are coming back. I'm fine right now and enjoying my hangover free morning while siting here typing and drinking coffee. But they probably will be back again. I forget what thread it was on here and who the poster was that wrote it, but as I logged in here yesterday looking for some inspiration one line jumped out at me and made a imapct: Stay sober. You won't regret it! And it makes perfect sence. Getting drunk at the time might of seem like a good idea but what would I be thinking the next day? All that work flushed down the toilet in one night. Not to forget I would probably picked up the phone and start calling people that I sholdn't and maybe going out for a night and getting into truble and blowing what money I have that's supposed to be bills and be broke.

As I said my rational side came to the rescue at last, but I sure felt like I was right on a razors edge. I'm like half scared I was so close to losing it but I guess this is one situation where it's good to have some fear. Because I have 4 months of sobriety but one night could of made up for all my "lost time" and I sure as hell be stranded back on s**t island all over again!
Bard is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-05-2009, 09:42 AM   #9 (permalink)
Member
 
mamabin's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: New Hampshire
Posts: 396
Thank your for posting this. I'm in my third month and I find myself almost talking myself into it. Nobody drinks in my house. If they did I don't know what I'd do. I'm quite anxious about summer as I usually hang by the pool, watch baseball, and drink every weekend.
__________________
mamabin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-05-2009, 10:11 AM   #10 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 36
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bard View Post
reminding myself over and over again of that nightmare world I just left behind an how hard of a road it was to get to where I am now.
Thank you for reminding me what I have been told to help battle the cravings. Playing the scenario to the end. If your going to revisit the possibility of drinking again, you need to play it to the end, by remembering the consequences. I have yet to meet an ex drinker that quit at the top of their game. I believe that there aren't too many alcoholics out there that quit drinking just because they were all so darn happy then and didn't need to drink anymore!

Amy
Amy08 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-05-2009, 11:36 AM   #11 (permalink)
A new dawn and new chapter
 
Bard's Avatar
 

Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Kansas City, Missouri
Posts: 298
Blog Entries: 27
Yeah summer has me worried to. But I keep reminding myself there was a reason why I got sober in the first place. I've been on and off the wagon enough times to learn that there's that one reason why I always keep coming back. And the only thing that might change is if i was to go off the wagon again, the next time i may not make it back. And it wont be becasue I'm happy to be a drunk again.
Bard is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:54 PM.