lionking

i need to/want to start clean again. i have progressed from needing medical detox to being clean 6 months to drinking every single day, again. I woke up still buzzed and not feeling so well so i drank what i thought would be one beer, 6 beers later and i do feel better physically. i do not want to go in hospital, i just cannot do that to my daughter. i have some ativan left from last time but truth be told, it is not like being drunk, it is not numbing enough

wow i am a mess.

i just wish i felt well enough to not drink i guess. i feel so sick. any advice? i know for pretty sure i am not unique:wtf2

lionking

just a few days ago i was only drinking late at night...here i am back to the weekend drunk. wtf heather......i am disguested with myself!

lionking

if i could just get a few days, 3 maybe i would be able to start again....

lionking

btw, i am scared very scared of seizures...never had one but the thought freaks me out

least

Please get medical help, whether in a detox place or at home, in getting thru the withdrawal. Alcoholism will kill you, but not before making you sick and miserable. I've been watching a British documentary called Rain in my heart. (there's a link to it in the alcoholism forum) I don't want to drink myself to death. I don't want to put my family thru the horror of watching me die.

Have you thought about AA? Lots of help in those rooms. Please try to stop drinking. It is possible to stop. I have, and want more than anything to stay sober. You can stay sober, one day at a time. Please get help. You're worth it.

justsomeguy

Just go to your regular doctor. I've been 3 different times, I basically don't have insurance, so it's $80 for the visit, they will give you some kind of valiumesque medicine to get you through the next couple days that will help with your seizures and ease the detox, if you need something to sleep they will usually give you something for that too. The meds usually cost me about $150. It's cost me a couple hundred dollars each time I've gone to the doc to detox but it's been well worth it, you can sleep and it makes it much easier. The last time I went I also got a prescription for antabuse. You may want to consult your doctor and consider it. I think it's a life saver for me.

Also, going foward, you have to get it through your head, (we all do) that we will NEVER be able to control the 2nd-20th drink, the ONLY drink you can control as an alcoholic is the first one.

Hoping you get better soon I know detox sucks.

Anna

Yes, go to the ER or to your dr.

You will get medical guidance on what you should do.

I know how overwhelming things can seem at the moment, but you can get through this.