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Old 04-03-2009, 12:30 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Just had my last drink


Hi, Im back again after another relapse.

Ive just had my last drink, the last of the wine that I had hidden in the kitchen cupboard, dont know why Im still hiding it Im here all on my own- just a habit I suppose.
Im feeling ok at the moment, the last drink is blocking everything out and taking all my worries away, I no its not going to last long, the reality and the guilt is soon going to come back and torture me making me crave for more to make things seem ok.

Not going to let it win this time.

Not going to let it ruin my life anymore than it already has.

AA is calling, I need my greater power to drag me kicking and screaming Through this long dark tunnel.

Im going to come back to SR every day to read and post to learn and grow stronger.
I hope you will be able to welcome me back and help me through this.

Thankyou all x
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Old 04-03-2009, 12:39 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Welcome back! YOu CAN beat this addiction. Take it one day at a time. Just don't drink today. Repeat tomorrow. And if one day is too long, take it one hour, one minute at a time. Get phone numbers in the next meeting you go to, so you have people to call if you get the craving to drink.

I"m glad you came back. We'll give you all the help we can to stay sober. I come here to read and post when I get the urge to drink and it helps me stay sober.

:ghug3
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Old 04-03-2009, 01:15 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Me 2, the moment that urge to drink hits im all over this forum because I know that some1 will talk me out of it
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Old 04-03-2009, 01:55 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Get thee to a meeting, call someone for a ride if you dont have one. Drink lots of water and be good yourself, but dont pick up once that pleasant feeling dissapates. Fight through it and before you know it, you will be feeling better sober again. Stick around and read and post to pass the time if you need to. We are here for ya!
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Old 04-03-2009, 06:32 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Hi Fletch - sounds like a good plan you have there. You already know you're on the road to hell if you continue. Realizing that is the toughest part. It only hurts for a little while, and then you can begin the business of rebuilding your life. I drank for over 25 yrs. & I'm now sober almost 1 yr. & 3mos., thanks to the friendship & wisdom I've found here on SR. Be proud of yourself for your decision, & be excited about the new day about to dawn for you.
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Old 04-03-2009, 06:38 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Hi Fletch,

Welcome back!
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Old 04-03-2009, 06:38 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Welcome back.....

Be as safe as possible as you de tox this time.
Don't hesitate to get medical attention.
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Old 04-03-2009, 06:58 PM   #8 (permalink)
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hey, try not to let the guilt get to you. seriously, every time you start to feel guilty about something (aka drinking, etc), FORCE yourself to think of something/anything else (something nice or funny, no matter how hard it is to think of something, if that makes sense).
the guilt is the worst, i totally understand
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Old 04-03-2009, 08:08 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Hey Fletch,

Welcome back.

I am on day 12. I can see now that I was headed on a downward spiral that would not end well. The first few days were tough, then it seemed easier, then it was tough again. Thinking about the past makes me feel bad especially because I can't go back and fix it. The future is yet to be made. I'm concentrating on the now and doing my best to live now the way I want to live it.

You can't change the past, but you can make your own future. Good luck, I'm sending good thoughts your way.
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Old 04-03-2009, 11:07 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Welcome back FLetch. You make us all stronger with you being here, sharing and posting.
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Old 04-04-2009, 08:58 AM   #11 (permalink)
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WELCOME back! You can do it! We're here!
I remember hiding my pipe in my drawer (or in the heater vent of my truck), every time I vowed to quit. I didn't know why. I thought "just in case" most of the time. Like I wasn't really just quite ready to give everything up. Or I thought, if I keep it as a reminder, it'll help me stay clean. It didn't, of course. But once I said I am REALLY DONE, I became willing and I threw that pipe out!
I am so glad you're back! I don't have much clean time, only 60 days, but it's been the best so far! The withdrawals weren't nice, but working the path to recovery has been a much more wonderful journey this time through, and I hope to stay on it, and will do what I can to help you with yours! *HUGS*
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Old 04-04-2009, 12:08 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Thankyou everyone

Just wanted to say thanks to everyone for there posts and support

Woke up today sober and felt so much better for it, took my litle boy to Legoland and had the most amazing day, so much fun and didnt even think of drink once, the sun was out what a beautiful day all round.

Thinking clearly and now even more determind to beat this disease.

Thanks SR for giving me the strengh to carry on and be the real me

Fletch x
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