The 1st Step and the 3rd Tradition
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Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Greater Manchester, England
Posts: 82
I am in my 10th year of sobriety and I still have to work the first step daily. It is the only step that needs to be done perfectly. I am working this step again and again throughout my sobriety because we alcoholics have no defense against the first drink. My life is still unmanageable without my Higher Power, however, this is getting better for me. Love to all who are struggling. Just keep doing what you are doing one day at a time.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 6,947
I guess it depends a little on how far down an individual goes... I realize this as I think all of this through and after a discussion with an AA...
I knew I was powerless over alcohol for quite some time. Didn't really care enough, didn't think I was in enough trouble... Therefore, for me, the "desire" to quit drinking lagged behind the knowledge that I was powerless over the drink and that my life was unmanageable... The desire was imposed, now I am growing it for myself and working the 1st step, every day. Thanx all!!
Mark
Mark
I knew I was powerless over alcohol for quite some time. Didn't really care enough, didn't think I was in enough trouble... Therefore, for me, the "desire" to quit drinking lagged behind the knowledge that I was powerless over the drink and that my life was unmanageable... The desire was imposed, now I am growing it for myself and working the 1st step, every day. Thanx all!!
Mark
Mark
Last edited by Mark75; 03-24-2009 at 04:40 AM. Reason: typo
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Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
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SFgirl I spent a lot of years not fully conceding that it was the first drink that got me drunk not the 5th or the 10th, or even the 15th drink that got me drunk.
I reached a point in my drinking where alcohol owned me, physically, mentally, & spiritually before I was finally willing to concede defeat, yet I continued to drink because I had no other choice, bad things started to happen if I went to long without a drink. Many do not have to reach that point to admit that the first drink is what gets them drunk and accept that to the bottom of thier soul.
Now time can build strength and knowledge in that fact if one continues to progress in thier recovery, but time can also be an enemy of some, those who get a bit cocky in their recovery and back off on doing the things that kept them sober, when one lets up on thier recovery the old ideas start to slide back in ones head, they begin to think things like "Well, hell I have gone 20 years without a drink, obviously I am not an alcoholic, an alcoholic could not go 20 years without a drink, I am sure my being older and more mature will let me control what I had no control over in my youth."
I know a man that had 22 years sober and decided it was safe for him to drink again, he had let up on his program, stopped going to meetings and helping other alcoholics, the last I heard in less then 6 months he has racked up at least 2 DUIs and totalled his Harley, he is still out there.........
I reached a point in my drinking where alcohol owned me, physically, mentally, & spiritually before I was finally willing to concede defeat, yet I continued to drink because I had no other choice, bad things started to happen if I went to long without a drink. Many do not have to reach that point to admit that the first drink is what gets them drunk and accept that to the bottom of thier soul.
Now time can build strength and knowledge in that fact if one continues to progress in thier recovery, but time can also be an enemy of some, those who get a bit cocky in their recovery and back off on doing the things that kept them sober, when one lets up on thier recovery the old ideas start to slide back in ones head, they begin to think things like "Well, hell I have gone 20 years without a drink, obviously I am not an alcoholic, an alcoholic could not go 20 years without a drink, I am sure my being older and more mature will let me control what I had no control over in my youth."
I know a man that had 22 years sober and decided it was safe for him to drink again, he had let up on his program, stopped going to meetings and helping other alcoholics, the last I heard in less then 6 months he has racked up at least 2 DUIs and totalled his Harley, he is still out there.........
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Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: UK
Posts: 196
Originally Posted by dgillz 
I don't see the paradox here.
The steps are suggestions on how an individual works the program. The traditions are suggestions on how an AA group runs their meetings.
If you are working step 1, no matter how well or how poorly, you are a member of the fellowship of AA.
Tradition 3 is a guideline for the groups which says that no one can be refused membership in AA if they have a desire to stop drinking. I think of the 3rd tradition as the equal opportunity tradition - you cannot keep someone out because they are female, black, gay or lesbian, non-christian or non-believer, homeless, don't speak English, etc., etc.
So as I said, I do not see the paradox at all. Here is an article on the traditions which may help:
Twelve Traditions - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
The steps are suggestions on how an individual works the program. The traditions are suggestions on how an AA group runs their meetings.
If you are working step 1, no matter how well or how poorly, you are a member of the fellowship of AA.
Tradition 3 is a guideline for the groups which says that no one can be refused membership in AA if they have a desire to stop drinking. I think of the 3rd tradition as the equal opportunity tradition - you cannot keep someone out because they are female, black, gay or lesbian, non-christian or non-believer, homeless, don't speak English, etc., etc.
So as I said, I do not see the paradox at all. Here is an article on the traditions which may help:
Twelve Traditions - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking if you are an alcoholic,
12x12 page 149 last para so the hand of providence early gave us a sign that any alcoholic is a member of our society when he says so
An AA group is for alcoholics only (Tradition Five). We all have problems other than our drinking but alcoholism is our only common problem.
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Kansas
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Originally Posted by sfgirl
Freedom1990—
I am not sure if that was a response to the general thread or to my post. But I realize that I may not have made myself completely clear in what I said. When I said I think I am 50% powerless over alcohol what I meant was not that I was not powerless over alcohol but that I have not completely accepted that. And I am not sure I will ever be able to fully accept "my powerlessness."
I am not sure if that was a response to the general thread or to my post. But I realize that I may not have made myself completely clear in what I said. When I said I think I am 50% powerless over alcohol what I meant was not that I was not powerless over alcohol but that I have not completely accepted that. And I am not sure I will ever be able to fully accept "my powerlessness."
I've completely accepted I am powerless over alcohol. The niggling doubt that I wasn't, plus other factors are what put me out there again in the active disease.
Step 2 (I am in AA) allows me to believe there is a power that will restore me to sanity.
Step 3 has me turn my will and my life over to a power greater than myself.
Simply put:
I can't.
He can.
I will let him.
It`s ok to stay sober
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Central NC
Posts: 20,902
step one-we admitted we were powerless over alcohol....were...is a key word overlooked here......now I am separated from alcohol,I have a new Power from the HP
I am a recovered alcoholic like Freedom,the alcohol problem has been removed,no struggle....no fight...no drinking desire....today,I`m only powerless if I drink it.
I am a recovered alcoholic like Freedom,the alcohol problem has been removed,no struggle....no fight...no drinking desire....today,I`m only powerless if I drink it.
It`s ok to stay sober
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Central NC
Posts: 20,902
there is a point to where someone is not a member of AA because of their drinking.
a drunk at the bar cannot truthfully say he is a member of AA so a person who is drinking is not a member of AA,don`t matter what they say.
look deeper than the short overview of tradition 3 that is commonly quoted,misleading and misunderstood.....
a drunk at the bar cannot truthfully say he is a member of AA so a person who is drinking is not a member of AA,don`t matter what they say.
look deeper than the short overview of tradition 3 that is commonly quoted,misleading and misunderstood.....
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 679
I guess I just don't quite get the whole powerlessness with HP thing and am sort of taking these steps in my own way so maybe my input isn't really valid in this discussion since I am not actually interpreting the way AA/AA members do.
Thanks for clarifying the "were" wording. That does change a lot. It basically makes it completely different than I personally interpret it. But I think for myself, I am going to stick to how I was thinking about it because I believe it is more helpful to me. I guess I partly equate step one with the issue of the addict voice and its inching its way in and my resolve to keep it out, a struggle that continues whether or not I am drinking or have decided to stay sober.
Thanks for clarifying the "were" wording. That does change a lot. It basically makes it completely different than I personally interpret it. But I think for myself, I am going to stick to how I was thinking about it because I believe it is more helpful to me. I guess I partly equate step one with the issue of the addict voice and its inching its way in and my resolve to keep it out, a struggle that continues whether or not I am drinking or have decided to stay sober.
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