mle-sober

I would agree absolutely that each and every step - including the decision of whether or not to have alcohol in your house - is entirely up to each of us as individuals. You don't have to go to AA - there are options. You don't have to have a sponsor or work the steps. Heck, some of us don't even quit drinking.

All anyone is contributing here is their own experience. I had to get rid of all the alcohol in the house (minus the vanilla extract, the various vinegars, the Nyquil, the mouthwash, etc ) for about the first 6 months. It was WAAAYYYYY to poisonous for me to have it in my presence. I think Mikefreak's ananolgy to a suicidal person keeping a loaded gun around is spot on, for me.

After about 6 months, however, I told my resentful husband that he could keep beer in the house again. I hate beer. But it was still scary at first and I even now notice it with a kind of "start" every time I walk by it in the garage. It was just that after 6 months, I felt it was a compromise I could make and a risk I could take. But I would never keep wine or liquor in the house. I do allow my family to bring RED wine over for meals but they have to take it home with them. So.... like everyone else here, my situation and my response to the issue is curtailed to my own life and experience.

My objection and anger was no doubt rooted in the minefield of my own marriage. I just feel a ton of anger that a spouse would try to get someone to drink when they are trying to quit. My own spouse is slowly (VERY slowly) emerging from a huge amount of prejudice and ignorance and jugement. And I think this triggered all the feelings associated with that, for me.

But I'm glad you are asking the questions and talking about it, North. Let us know how things work out so I can let me breath out. ( :

SHawk25

I had 3 beers left in my fridge. I had no urge to drink them. But just looking at them made me think of my past.. Almost despised them.. Threw them away with a smile on my face..

Pinkcuda

I did all of my drinking at home. I didn't get rid of mine when I quit. I just didn't drink it. After all I had an honest desire to quit. Eventually my friends drank it. As I type I am looking at a bottle of wine called "Blue Suede Shoes" with a picture of Elvis on the label. I just don't drink. Even if I did, I don't have a corkscrew. But to ask if you should or should not keep any in the house is a question that only you can answer. You could pour it out. There's always a liquor store somewhere. The book specifically mentions something about Greenland and the Polar Ice Cap.
Either way my take on the subject is this, Just as when we thought we were drinking from the bottle, the bottle was really drinking from us and that when we think we are hiding the alcohol from us it is really us hiding from alcohol.
Nobody ever told me I had to be afraid of the stuff. I'm not.
I'm Respectful, yet not afraid.

klopper22

I am glad to see you are still doing well, Hawk.

I still can't see a brown bottle without thinking very briefly about my past.

Can I ask how your relationship is with your fiance?

firestorm090

No skeletons to hide, no booze in the closet seems the best approach to me. I'd sump it all, after telling your wife how much it bothers you.

And, if I'm right, it does bother you or you wouldn't ask this question. Just my thoughts.

firestorm090

Oops. I meant dump it, not sump it, lol.

ADayAtATime

To be honest...I would say Yes, get rid of the alcohol.
If it were in my house it would be too tempting...
XOXO

SHawk25

We've been having email conversations for the past 10 days or so.. There are some ups and downs. She is coming over tonight to do some laundry and to talk. I'm making her dinner. She said she thinks about us getting back together but doesn't know. She said she isn't ready.. I'll let you know how our meeting goes. Thanks for caring..

klopper22

I hope the meeting goes very well.

Maggot4Life

Yea me 2, good luck man!