I'm tired.... and whinging
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Here's me. but when drinking could be found in doorways!
Posts: 1,138
I'm tired.... and whinging
Im just sooooo tired this last couple of weeks.
I really cant be bothered with anything work, people, life.
If i could just curl up and hide away i would... but unfortunately the bills need paying and i need to work.
I feel bad because i'm not giving my all to work... my m/health is not doing so well just now.
My brain wont relax. It doesn't give me a minutes peace.
I went to the dr's months ago and they gave me pills... but i'm sh*te at taking pills... I never remember... I was also given campral afew month's ago... i just cant get into a routine of taking them.... I have been taking them when i remember.
My brain is like a seive at the best of times.... but its pathetic just now.
I'm so down on myself too..... I really hate being me... I mean truely hate being me....
I'm so sorry i wrote all this... i just needed to get it out
I really cant be bothered with anything work, people, life.
If i could just curl up and hide away i would... but unfortunately the bills need paying and i need to work.
I feel bad because i'm not giving my all to work... my m/health is not doing so well just now.
My brain wont relax. It doesn't give me a minutes peace.
I went to the dr's months ago and they gave me pills... but i'm sh*te at taking pills... I never remember... I was also given campral afew month's ago... i just cant get into a routine of taking them.... I have been taking them when i remember.
My brain is like a seive at the best of times.... but its pathetic just now.
I'm so down on myself too..... I really hate being me... I mean truely hate being me....
I'm so sorry i wrote all this... i just needed to get it out
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Australia
Posts: 3,597
louis - I could have written the same thing! Life is a struggle at the moment. I take daily medication too and have trouble remembering to take it. I put each dose in one of those 7 day pill boxes. Mine has compartments for am and pm. I leave it on the counter and it really does help me to remember to take it. I also carry some extra in my purse just in case I forget.
Are you in early sobriety? I am 4.5 months sober now. My memory is shocking but people tell me it will get better. I make lists and forget to look at the lists lol.
Are you in early sobriety? I am 4.5 months sober now. My memory is shocking but people tell me it will get better. I make lists and forget to look at the lists lol.
Attitude of Gratitude
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Dayton, Ohio
Posts: 2,305
I'm not sure if your an addict/alcoholic/friend or family member but my first question is, are you using?
No matter if you are the addict/alcoholic or family member, this disease wants total control over us. The last year or so of my active addiction, I isolated at home. I didn't want to be around anyone else but at the same time, I didn't like being alone. I was terribly lonley. I can completely identify with how you're feeling. I felt like I was just a hopeless case that there was no help for.
I've heard of Campral but I'm not sure what it is used for. Have you been diagnosed with depression? I was years ago. I take Prozac which works wonders for me. I also had a problem remembering to take them. I had a post it on my bathroom mirror for a few months to remind myself to take it in the morning. Now it's just part of my morning routine, just like brushing my teeth.
For me, the only way I could get over wanting to isolate was to force myself to get out and around other people. Going to AA/NA or Alanon/Naranon are not only great areas to help with addiction but to be around others, make friends and start joining in on the events. With spring "springing" these groups are beginning to plan many activities. You could literally find something to do nearly every weekend.
Please feel free to PM anytime if you need to talk, vent . . . And please don't apologize for sharing your feelings. That's such an important part of recovery. For years we held everything in, that's what our disease wants us to do.
God Bless,
Judy
I believe I can do this
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Milwaukee, WI
Posts: 85
SR is an excellent place for sharing what you are going through. I have benefited greatly from the wisdom and experience from those who have walked the path of sobriety before me. I don't have any special wisdom, unfortunately, but what you're describing is very close to how I felt awhile back. It's like my body was on overdrive at night and I was completely exhausted every day. I was sad, my emotions were up and down and I had trouble remembering things. I still have trouble sleeping and with anxiety but the depression and problems with memory have greatly improved. Are you still using?
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,497
Louis,
I understand how debilitating this disease is and how hard it is to bear.
Taking your medication could help you get through this, so why not try to take it as soon as you wake up every morning and hopefully you can establish a routine to do that.
Try going out for a walk or do something nice for yourself.
I understand how debilitating this disease is and how hard it is to bear.
Taking your medication could help you get through this, so why not try to take it as soon as you wake up every morning and hopefully you can establish a routine to do that.
Try going out for a walk or do something nice for yourself.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Here's me. but when drinking could be found in doorways!
Posts: 1,138
Thankyou
I have not drank for 16 days... my heads so messed up though...
Campral is a medication i take to stop the physical cravings of alcohol.
I am meant to take 2pills x 3 a day.... im lucky if i remember 1 lot... Im to take them with food... but ive no appetitie to eat this time round...
I was given meds for depression and had appointments for the psyciatrist... but i cancelled them... she said she only deals in medication and as i dont take them thats all she deals with.
I have been waiting nearly a year to see a psychotherapist... my alcohol counsellor is going to chase it up... dont hold out much luck.
Sorry... I sound like a miserable f**k... i know i do and i feel like one.
You know i dont know why i am even coming on here.... all i am doing is moaning and being depressing.
I'm sorry... im done (and before anyone pounces... thats not an attention seeking done)
I have not drank for 16 days... my heads so messed up though...
Campral is a medication i take to stop the physical cravings of alcohol.
I am meant to take 2pills x 3 a day.... im lucky if i remember 1 lot... Im to take them with food... but ive no appetitie to eat this time round...
I was given meds for depression and had appointments for the psyciatrist... but i cancelled them... she said she only deals in medication and as i dont take them thats all she deals with.
I have been waiting nearly a year to see a psychotherapist... my alcohol counsellor is going to chase it up... dont hold out much luck.
Sorry... I sound like a miserable f**k... i know i do and i feel like one.
You know i dont know why i am even coming on here.... all i am doing is moaning and being depressing.
I'm sorry... im done (and before anyone pounces... thats not an attention seeking done)
Leap of Faith Survivor
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 4,555
Louis, I would be sad if you stopped coming on here...
keep talking about this, don't worry about what you sound like.
try and figure out a way to get your meds into you each day...set the alarm and take them..set your cell phone and take them...have an alarm service call in and take them...but take them...no appetite? even a banana or a piece of bread will suffice....
one thing at a time...you sound completely overwhelmed..
I would recommend that getting help for your depression be the next task after not using and taking your meds....
hang in there, Louis
keep talking about this, don't worry about what you sound like.
try and figure out a way to get your meds into you each day...set the alarm and take them..set your cell phone and take them...have an alarm service call in and take them...but take them...no appetite? even a banana or a piece of bread will suffice....
one thing at a time...you sound completely overwhelmed..
I would recommend that getting help for your depression be the next task after not using and taking your meds....
hang in there, Louis
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Montana
Posts: 112
Hey Louis--
When I quit drinking about the only thing I felt like eating was--well, a whole lot of nothing.
Maybe try some light fruit, toast, or soup. I know I didn't feel like eating--but after even a snack I felt a little more energy. And, it gave me something to focus on for that tiny period of time.
Hang in there--drop a PM if you want to rant. I will listen to you.
Best
When I quit drinking about the only thing I felt like eating was--well, a whole lot of nothing.
Maybe try some light fruit, toast, or soup. I know I didn't feel like eating--but after even a snack I felt a little more energy. And, it gave me something to focus on for that tiny period of time.
Hang in there--drop a PM if you want to rant. I will listen to you.
Best
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Here's me. but when drinking could be found in doorways!
Posts: 1,138
Thanks...
I feel so self centred.... I cant even reply to you all properly... you've all taken the time to post and i cant reply properly.
I even got annoyed with the guy i support... i snapped at him... whats that about? How dare i take out my own f**king mess on him!!!!
I really dont know what to do.... when i was drinking i didn't have to face things... now i do... I really dont know if i can do this.
Thankyou again and i am sorry
I feel so self centred.... I cant even reply to you all properly... you've all taken the time to post and i cant reply properly.
I even got annoyed with the guy i support... i snapped at him... whats that about? How dare i take out my own f**king mess on him!!!!
I really dont know what to do.... when i was drinking i didn't have to face things... now i do... I really dont know if i can do this.
Thankyou again and i am sorry
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 87
Lois, quit beating yourself up bro. It has been only 16 days. Your body needs to adjust. I am on day 18 and still really tired. You should be proud of yourself for going 16 days and not giving up. Things can only get better. I think it is so strange when I hear people can't eat. All I can think about is food and sweets. Hang in there and quit being so hard on yourself.
Living in sobriety
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 3,870
Hey Louis. I hope you feel better soon. The body does take time to recover. I too was exhausted in early recovery. You need to allow time to heal. I tried to be very gentle with myself, early nights, lavender in my bath, walks in the fresh air, eat fruit and veg, drink plenty of water, listen to some soft music, take naps when possible etc......
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