ImagineMe

I had over 60 days sober until I encourtered some resentments and then went down to Florida for a court hearing where my son's father owes over 5,000 in arrears for back child support.

I also had dinner w/ my father who is now a serious drinker (he waited until he was 60 to drink; go figure) and is in really bad shape.

Put those two together and the fact that I had not gotten a sponsor and was not actually working the steps and you have a train wreck.

After over 60 days I drank a bottle of wine and was given a gift. The gift to see how resentments can start the ball rolling and how awful I felt after 60 days of feeling really good. I sat and watched it happen like a car crash in slow motion.

After returning home I ran to a meeting and got a sponsor. I also found a group that I really like. So now I am back to getting healthy and taking care of myself.

I am also working on staying away from toxic family members. My mom is enabling my son's father. He has been in detox about 3 times over the last 5 years and continues to drink and drive. She is renting him a room in her home and is adding to his health issues. He is slowly killing himself and is having blood sugar issues and now heart issues; death is right around the corner.

I struggle with asking her to get him to a program.

So there you have it, I picked up a white chip because I did not do so last time. It reminds me that I took 3 steps back and now I must go forward.

SoberforME

YOU YOU!!!

I did almost the same thing after 30 days the first time. I drank for two months more.

I've been sober over 60 days now and now I have my desire chip from my first re-meeting, my 30 day and my 60 day propped up on my bathroom mirror. SO I'm reminded every day of what I've accomplished so far.

I'm so happy you came back and wasted no time!!

nickishine

So glad you are back! SUCCESS IS FAILURE TURNED INSIDE OUT!!!

I have a resentment today and needed to read this. Thank you!

:ghug3

ImagineMe

Yep..I came right back. One day was enough for me. I cannot even explain how bad I felt.

Thanks for the support.

Freedom1990

Yes indeed, resentment is the #1 offender.

I am so glad you made it back, and will certainly keep you in my prayers as you move forward in recovery! :ghug

mamabin

Thank you for posting this.
I've also had to rid myself of a toxic family member, and it isn't easy dealing with what the rest of the family thinks.
Good for you for catching it in one day!!!
I'm sure you're a stronger person for it, although it may not seem that way right now.

ImagineMe

Thank you. I feel like making a huge banner that says "if you are toxic, stay away..and this includes family." Someone once asked me why I felt so obligated to keep certain family members in my life when they abused me repeatedly. I could not give an answer and now, with the stuff I saw this week, I have an answer; I cannot continue to put up with abuse.
My family members have no boundaries what so ever. They just walk all over one another.

I am in such a healthy situation up here in Atlanta. My marriage is amazaing, my husband, a non-drinker, is amazing, his family is nomal, my babies are great, there are such healthy things going on.

To go back there is to go to a very toxic place.

Thank you again for reading.