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"AGAIN" .... not part of my vocabulary! At least not in the "Nickionary" dictionary! Everytime I relapse, drink whatever... and I come back (thank God I do), I put a negative connotation on my "being back" by saying "Here I am, or here I go 'AGAIN'!" The truth of the matter as I see it now, is I'm right here - in the here and now - and no matter how many times I've travelled down that road to make it back "AGAIN" with relapsing, bingeing, whatever..., I'm here now! All the yesterdays and the "would've, could've, should've" scenarios don't mean squat! All the times I've tried before, means something but not like "here I do AGAIN".... It's too negative for me. I've said it way too many times and I have that burden on me coming back like it'll keep playing out the same way as before -- like a revolving door! I want NEW sobriety today! I don't want what I've had and I don't want to keep reminding myself that "once again" I'm back on Day 5! Today is DAY 5 for me and I'm going to make it as good as possible by FIRST not drinking today! Why I felt the need to share this ----- who knows! I believe what I believe though and feel encouraged by my NEW life with all ya all!!! :Val004::ghug |
Thanks for this, Nickishine. I'm a bit tired of going back to square one, day one, too. (go directly to jail, do not collect $200--or however that goes in the Monopoly game) This is day 9 of my sobriety, and this time I plan to get off my circular game board, one day at a time, hey? |
Hi Nicki, I like your post. These lyrics from John Denver are on my fridge and I think they say so much: "There's nothin behind me, and nothin that ties me To somethin that might have been true yesterday. Tomorrow is open, and right now it seems to be more Than enough to just be there today." |
Originally Posted by 51anna
(Post 2121711)
Hi Nicki, I like your post. These lyrics from John Denver are on my fridge and I think they say so much: "There's nothin behind me, and nothin that ties me To somethin that might have been true yesterday. Tomorrow is open, and right now it seems to be more Than enough to just be there today." From what song are those lyrics from...? |
Nicki, I didn't see you here yesterday and I got a little worried. SOOOO happy to see you are on day 5, there is nothing better than day 5! remember were done with day 1's. The hardest part IMO is breaking day 3. Here is key! we are here now, what are we going to do now? Yesterday is in the past, lets leave it there. If we had to live in yesterday we wouldn't be here now. The hardest part for me is doing all the activities that were always accompanied by alcohol. Like last night I had a BBQ the first one without alcohol. weird, but I did it. I plan to go on a picnic with my wife and take lemonade , also seems weird.:ghug3 I am going to try and do all the things I used to do drinking, which is pretty much everything. I don't know how I will manage bowling and not drinking, but it has to be done. so lets live in the now! |
today is all we have.. |
Nikki - Congrats on day 5 sweetie :) |
Originally Posted by HardwiredFlaws
(Post 2121718)
Nicki, I didn't see you here yesterday and I got a little worried. SOOOO happy to see you are on day 5, there is nothing better than day 5! remember were done with day 1's. The hardest part IMO is breaking day 3. Here is key! we are here now, what are we going to do now? Yesterday is in the past, lets leave it there. If we had to live in yesterday we wouldn't be here now. The hardest part for me is doing all the activities that were always accompanied by alcohol. Like last night I had a BBQ the first one without alcohol. weird, but I did it. I plan to go on a picnic with my wife and take lemonade , also seems weird.:ghug3 I am going to try and do all the things I used to do drinking, which is pretty much everything. I don't know how I will manage bowling and not drinking, but it has to be done. so lets live in the now! How fun is life, Bud! You got it 'GOIN' ON'!!!! Thanks for the invite for the BBQ...! I'll remember that when I have my next get together! HaHa! :Val004: |
It's from Sweet Surrender and I think the lyrics are amazing! Lost and alone on some forgotten highway Travelled by many remembered by few Lookin for something that I can believe in Lookin for something that Id like to do with my life Theres nothin behind me and nothin that ties me To somethin that might have been true yesterday Tomorrow is open and right now it seems to be more Than enough to just be there today And I dont know what the future is holdin in store I dont know where Im goin, Im not sure where Ive been Theres a spirit that guides me, a light that shines for me My life is worth the livin, I dont need to see the end Sweet, sweet surrender Live, live without care Like a fish in the water Like a bird in the air |
Hi Nickishine, Great Job on Day 5...I'm glad you came in and posted, I was looking for you. Well, if you posted earlier and I missed it...I'm sorry :ghug3 I just wanted to see your sunshiny face and let you know that I'm still hanging in there with you...but I'm a day behind (Day 4), but I'm still rolling. A Day At A Time, is my motto. Thanks for being here your such a great inspiration to me and other's that need it. Love ya girl, XOXO |
Originally Posted by ADayAtATime
(Post 2121812)
Hi Nickishine, Great Job on Day 5...I'm glad you came in and posted, I was looking for you. Well, if you posted earlier and I missed it...I'm sorry :ghug3 I just wanted to see your sunshiny face and let you know that I'm still hanging in there with you...but I'm a day behind (Day 4), but I'm still rolling. A Day At A Time, is my motto. Thanks for being here your such a great inspiration to me and other's that need it. Love ya girl, XOXO Congrats on DAY 4 :) :).... that's huge when ya think about it! 24 hrs is an amazing feat for us alkies and addicts! :ghug3 Right back at 'cha! xoxox |
This is a beautiful thread. Thank you. :ghug3 |
Check out the lyrics to the song "Sweet Surrender" that Anna posted on this thread you guys... AWESOME!... It brought tears to my eyes! I don't know about all ya all, but today I am surrendering and saying the "Alcohol has kicked my a** for the last time"!! I pray... as it really is only one day at a time but the white flag is up high and I, with your help, am gonna stay sober one more day! :) :ghug P.S. THANKS, ANNA! YOU'RE AWESOME -- ALWAYS!!! :You_Rock_ |
yay!!!!! :ghug3 |
thanks nicki! i do not know how to get back on tract? i have drank for so many years, geez, what do i do? thank you for aqll you heip!!!!!sorry i feel like i do not deserve heip, as long as i continue to drink, i choose ti be heipless i do not even kniiw what ti di sorry |
Originally Posted by jowinbo
(Post 2122284)
i do not know how to get back on tract? i have drank for so many years, geez, what do i do? thank you for aqll you heip!!!!!sorry i feel like i do not deserve heip, as long as i continue to drink, i choose ti be heipless i do not even kniiw what ti di sorry You are not in a place where I or the rest of us haven't been! As long as we're in the bottle, everything seems helpless and hopeless!!! That IS the lie of this dis-ease! YOU do deserve help, but moreover, YOU DESERVE SOBRIETY AND A GOOD LIFE! You may not believe it, but I believe it FOR YOU! You are so deserving and are loved! :ghug3 Put down the drink and reach out to all of us sober tomorrow, K? Nothing will get any better DRUNK! Hit your knees, crawl into bed and come see me/us when you wake up and we'll help ya see through another pair of glasses, K? Please don't "pick up" before then because it's a downward spiral you could quickly go down and I know you don't want that! My prayers are right there from my lips to God's ears for you right now, J! :praying Hang in there and don't give up the fight tomorrow! |
:hug: Forward we go..side by side |
For Nickishine, and for anyone who wants to enjoy. I have this song on my ipod and it always makes my spirit soar: YouTube - John Denver Sweet Surrender |
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