cmb

I am a 29 year old mother of 2 Ive been married for 7 years 5 years ago I started taking loratabs before I knew it I was taking 30 a day I told my provider and they placed me on methadone and I abused those now im taking oxy, dilaudid, and heroin 6 months ago I started shooting up I need help the only family I have left is my brother who wont spaek to me or let me see my nephew who I raised while my brother was in Iraq and my grandma who crys every time I see her my kids are big enough to know whats going on someone please help me

Music man

you have taken the first step and you are in the right place. someone with more experience with pills will be by shortly, I am just a Drunk.
But wanted to tell you if it seems like no one is answering your post it's because most of us are drunks and have little experience with pills.

Spiritual Seeker

Go to rehab !
Your life sure sounds like it has become unmanageable.
You have no choice. You don't want to live like this another day.
Your kids deserve a mother who is present, sober, available, stable, responsible, present, and puts their needs first.

Not only can you do this, you must, and you know it.
Willing is a good place to be

ANGELINA243

Welcome! Glad you are here! Have you ever been to a NA meeting? Keep posting...sharing here at SR. Have you considered going to detox and/or treatment facility? You are not alone. We do recover.

serenityqueen

cmb

Thanks everyone who responded I understand some of u prefer alcohol but to me a demon is a demon it may not be the same one but they all give us the same outcome I plan to look into a few programs on Monday you guys are right I have to learn to live a opiate free life for myself and my children

least

There is a Substance Abuse forum that might have more helpful info for you. I'm also just a drunk and have no experience with pills. I agree that NA may also be a help to you in breaking your addiction. Have you told your doctor about your abuse? I would start there and ask for help.

Welcome!:ghug3

Amazonqueen522

cmb, Give yourself a chance go to a detox and continue to get help...once your off the drugs you will begin to experience new things and feel so much better....Your family will see you has a different person and things will start to fall into place....:ghug3

I know you can do it.

mle-sober

It sounds like you need rehab. You have a hard task ahead of you. But it is possible to change your life and save yourself and your children from this horrible addiction. You have to be willing to do the hard work that it's going to take. But it is possible. Others have done it before you. Do you have insurance? If so, that might be the first place to begin looking. Call them and ask them who is in network. If you do not have insurance, I know that there are places that will still help you. Look in your phone book and start calling and asking questions.

You can do this!!!

mle-sober

Also - I'm sorry I didn't say this first: Welcome!! I'm glad you're here. I hope you stay and keep sharing your story and taking solace in others' experience, strength and hope. SR has helped me so much. I'm sure it can help you too!

serenityqueen

Good, you came back! That's positive! I hope you'll let us know what you found out on Monday. I didn't have any insurance so it was a little more difficult to get help but it is out there! There were so many times in the beginning when I was making phone call after phone call, going to the hospital several days in a row at 6:00 am, only to be told late in the afternoon to come back the next day at 6:00 am. It would have been very easy to throw in the towel and say,"F*ck it!" but I kept going.

Think of all the energy you put into getting the dope, and put even more into your Recovery! I envisioned my addiction as some big ol ugly monster that was determined to take me from my Son and those who love me and put me in the ground. That's it's primary purpose! Make your Recovery your primary purpose! You have two children who sound as though they are relatively young, this is the perfect time to get clean and get into Recovery. My Son was 16 when I got Clean & Sober, so he unfortunately has many bad memories. . . he has for the most part forgiven me, but he will never forget. If you battle this demon and win now, there won't be as many memories, hopefully none, that haunt them when them get older. Most people say you have to do it for yourself, but right now, if doing it for your kids is what is going to get your through, then do it for them!

We're here for you. As I said in my PM, contact me whenever!

I'll keep you and your Family in my Prayers,
Judy

cmb

thank you my children are 11 and 7 so they have some bad memories but i will conquer this i just have to move forward from many things in november i was sexually assulted and hit by the car from the people who assulted me that night i went to my grandmas and did not have my methadone wich is what i was using for pain and to stay away from the other opiates and i took an oxy that my grandma gave me for pain when i went to the doc the drug tested me and i tested positive for oxy and she cut me off my methadone i was taking 150mg a day so when that happened i relapsed bad now im trying to find a better way to get clean i tried a theapist but they told me everything i told them would remain private and then went and told my doc everything which i think is the real reason she cut me off now im having big trust issues with therapist and the other one i tried to contact 3 diffrent times and they wont call me back to make an apponitment my mom died in april of pancriatic cancer from drinking and my dad committed suicide 19 yrs ago because of cocaine im starting to feel desperate i dont want the cycle to continue it has to end one way or the other

Tommyh

sounds like you need some kind of rehab and medical help ,especially since you have been shooting up heroin.You can get clean and recover,but it is extremely hard by yourself in this condition.Get help please

mle-sober

Try not to despair. It is hard, I know. But just keep looking for the ways in which you might be able to turn your life around. Pray, if that is part of what you know. And just keep moving forward, taking the next right step.

Just keep looking for solutions.

Now you have a bunch of people at SR who are rooting for you! Keep posting!

cmb

thank you for all your support i appreciate it i dont know if any of u have ever felt like this in recovery but lately it feels like every step i try to take forward i fall two behind any advise