2nd lesson learned
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: youngstown, ohio
Posts: 2
2nd lesson learned
hello everyone,
i just stumbled across this website today. i have gone through a very unfortunate weekend. i got my second dui offense. i was out for my birthday (2/13) and valentines day celebration on valentines day night. the original plan was to just stay in with my significant other, cook dinner, and enjoy each others company. the plan changed because one of my best friends from high school organized our old crew that had stayed in touch over the years, all to go out in the town we went to college in. and here comes in my problem....
i believe my problem is that of making responsible decisions. i dont use my head sometimes. i know that i deserved this. this is truly a wake up call this second time around.
in 2003, i was 21. that is when i got my first offense. things were much different then, and i think my relationship with alchohol back then was not good. i was just realizing that i was gay. i was very scared, was out drinking too much, trying to bury feelings, or rather surrounding myself with people like me at gay clubs and drinking too much... anyways, i was in college then. and not having a license on a college campus wasnt so bad... and i didnt have all that much to lose then.. before i knew it all the ramifications were over. as i graduated a few yrs later, i began to get job offers, i was being responsible, and if i drank i would not drive.
unfortunately, as time went by i guess i began to lose sight of what i had learned back then. i am now 27. i am in an incredible relationship. very much in love. and i think i have truly found "the one" for me. the only thing that hasnt really been good is that my old company has downsized and i am jobless and feeling worthless and discouraged as a result. i do not want to mooch off of anyone. i just want to work. i want to be a productive member of society.
this weekend i was so stupid. and i had a big lapse in judgement. i got pulled over for speeding in 25 mph zone... doing 30-something.. and i had alchohol on my breath and 3 people in my car. my sig other and my friends are just sick over what happened. and that they didnt realize the possibility that i might not be okay to drive, and to just get a cab. i definitely did not use my head either.
i am just so mad at myself. i know i cant keep crying about it, and i cant take it back.. i just have to move forward from here.. but im so disappointed in myself. as if finding work in this economy, and in northeast ohio isnt hard enough, now i had to go and do this to myself and make things so hard.
i know i deserve it. i dont think i learned my lesson the first time. now im going to get hit hard with jail time and house arrest (probably at least 20 days of each or more), fines, etc.. i definitely will not have a license for 2 years at least.
i have decided i am selling my car to my sister (she really needs a new one), and ill give it to her for the remaing amount of my loan (12 months), so she'll get a great deal. i honestly would rather take a break from driving altogether for a few years. move to a location where public transportation is viable. i dont believe i deserve to be driving. i think i owe it to myself, and those around me to not do it at all for awhile. i know its a priviledge and not a right.
at this point, im just so sick. cant eat, cant sleep. i have been smoking cigarettes alot in the past few days. i dont even smoke. im just so scared of what is going to happen to me. i hope that the judge does not throw the book at me. i hope i get the basic sentence. i just want to get it over with, and work work work. ill walk, bike, take cabs... i just want to work. and not let my bills fall behind, get my fines paid, and just try to move forward and better myself. im trying to find the silver lining in this cloud. i think i will become more physically fit by walking and biking everywhere. i also know that i am lucky. lucky in the fact that since i appearently had to learn this lesson again, i will learn it by facing the consequences of law, but at least i did not hurt anyone i love, myself, or even a stranger.
eventhough i did hurt people emotionally. those that love and worry about me. and of course, disappointing myself..... i know it will get better. i am just scared.
thank you all for listening (or rather, reading haha) all of this. i tend to ramble, and i think im trying to get this off my chest and into the universe.
has anyone had to deal with this? what do you do to keep your spirits up? and to stay motivated so that you make the correct steps to coming back from this? the last thing i would want to do is become very depressed by my current lack of job, finances, etc and start drinking for the wrong reasons. i dont want to do that. and i dont want to ruin my relationship at all with the love of my life.
nice to meet you all here
:praying
i just stumbled across this website today. i have gone through a very unfortunate weekend. i got my second dui offense. i was out for my birthday (2/13) and valentines day celebration on valentines day night. the original plan was to just stay in with my significant other, cook dinner, and enjoy each others company. the plan changed because one of my best friends from high school organized our old crew that had stayed in touch over the years, all to go out in the town we went to college in. and here comes in my problem....
i believe my problem is that of making responsible decisions. i dont use my head sometimes. i know that i deserved this. this is truly a wake up call this second time around.
in 2003, i was 21. that is when i got my first offense. things were much different then, and i think my relationship with alchohol back then was not good. i was just realizing that i was gay. i was very scared, was out drinking too much, trying to bury feelings, or rather surrounding myself with people like me at gay clubs and drinking too much... anyways, i was in college then. and not having a license on a college campus wasnt so bad... and i didnt have all that much to lose then.. before i knew it all the ramifications were over. as i graduated a few yrs later, i began to get job offers, i was being responsible, and if i drank i would not drive.
unfortunately, as time went by i guess i began to lose sight of what i had learned back then. i am now 27. i am in an incredible relationship. very much in love. and i think i have truly found "the one" for me. the only thing that hasnt really been good is that my old company has downsized and i am jobless and feeling worthless and discouraged as a result. i do not want to mooch off of anyone. i just want to work. i want to be a productive member of society.
this weekend i was so stupid. and i had a big lapse in judgement. i got pulled over for speeding in 25 mph zone... doing 30-something.. and i had alchohol on my breath and 3 people in my car. my sig other and my friends are just sick over what happened. and that they didnt realize the possibility that i might not be okay to drive, and to just get a cab. i definitely did not use my head either.
i am just so mad at myself. i know i cant keep crying about it, and i cant take it back.. i just have to move forward from here.. but im so disappointed in myself. as if finding work in this economy, and in northeast ohio isnt hard enough, now i had to go and do this to myself and make things so hard.
i know i deserve it. i dont think i learned my lesson the first time. now im going to get hit hard with jail time and house arrest (probably at least 20 days of each or more), fines, etc.. i definitely will not have a license for 2 years at least.
i have decided i am selling my car to my sister (she really needs a new one), and ill give it to her for the remaing amount of my loan (12 months), so she'll get a great deal. i honestly would rather take a break from driving altogether for a few years. move to a location where public transportation is viable. i dont believe i deserve to be driving. i think i owe it to myself, and those around me to not do it at all for awhile. i know its a priviledge and not a right.
at this point, im just so sick. cant eat, cant sleep. i have been smoking cigarettes alot in the past few days. i dont even smoke. im just so scared of what is going to happen to me. i hope that the judge does not throw the book at me. i hope i get the basic sentence. i just want to get it over with, and work work work. ill walk, bike, take cabs... i just want to work. and not let my bills fall behind, get my fines paid, and just try to move forward and better myself. im trying to find the silver lining in this cloud. i think i will become more physically fit by walking and biking everywhere. i also know that i am lucky. lucky in the fact that since i appearently had to learn this lesson again, i will learn it by facing the consequences of law, but at least i did not hurt anyone i love, myself, or even a stranger.
eventhough i did hurt people emotionally. those that love and worry about me. and of course, disappointing myself..... i know it will get better. i am just scared.
thank you all for listening (or rather, reading haha) all of this. i tend to ramble, and i think im trying to get this off my chest and into the universe.
has anyone had to deal with this? what do you do to keep your spirits up? and to stay motivated so that you make the correct steps to coming back from this? the last thing i would want to do is become very depressed by my current lack of job, finances, etc and start drinking for the wrong reasons. i dont want to do that. and i dont want to ruin my relationship at all with the love of my life.
nice to meet you all here
:praying
Resident
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Toronto, Ontario
Posts: 4,150
Welcome to Sr Jenk13.
I had a DUI and was fortunate that that was the last time I drove while drinking . I did keep drinking for another 20 years after that though. It is fortunate that nobody was hurt.
Not much you can do about it now as what is done is done.
Are you planning on quitting drinking because of this?
I had a DUI and was fortunate that that was the last time I drove while drinking . I did keep drinking for another 20 years after that though. It is fortunate that nobody was hurt.
Not much you can do about it now as what is done is done.
Are you planning on quitting drinking because of this?
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