Returning to Normal Drinking
Sober since 9th May 2008
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 2,973
Returning to Normal Drinking
Seems to me that there are more and more people wanting to return to drinking again, returning to normal drinking aka for me, back to the madness.
Got me thinking today though, what exactly is " normal " drinking ?
When, if ever, did I drink normally ?
I first tasted alcohol aged 16/17, did most of my drinking either in the park or on buses to football matches, mostly cheap lager or cider.
Looking back I suppose at that time I was still drinking " normally ".
I think though I started down the road to where my problems lay. Where I was always different to everyone else, although I thought I was so much cleverer than them was, the day after a big night out.
Where everyone else would happily spend the day suffering from a hangover I'd simply just start drinking again, never could understand how people could suffer when they could just carry right on.
The result, I'd often still be feeling rough the thusday after a saturday night out after drinking through the week. Often just getting over one weekend in time for the next. Normal drinking !!!!!
Soon started the 15 years I spent drinking in secret ater that, beer to start with but pretty soon realised the empties were too hard to hide and moved on to half bottles of vodka. While still living at home with my parents I was pouring vodka into coke bottles and drinking them under the guise of drinking a soft drink.
When I moved away it got easier to drink, while sharing a house I was openly drinking every night, so was everyone else I told myself, looking back though I was drinking more, topping up when nobody was looking, getting drinks for everyone but pouring an extra one for myself.
Then it was back with my parents for a while, the secret drinking every day continued until I moved in with my now wife. Didn't drink in secret for a while but wasn't long before I was, needed more than I was willing to own up to drinking.
By that time I was drinking a minimum of a half bottle of vodka every day, I remember being on a boat trip off the Island of Rhodes, probably 2001, I remember choking for a drink, went to the bar and got a beer for me and my wife, went to a bar on another deck so she couldn't see and ordered a double vodka as well, downed that then back with the beers, spent the rest of what should have been an enjoyable day in the sun sneaking about, think I actually claimed I had a dodgy stomach and had to keep going to the toilet when what I was really doing was nipping back to the bar for more Vodka.
I've spent the last 20 odd years when I think about it, lyeing, being secretive, worring that others were drinking too slow, drinking before nights out cos I knew nobody else would drink enough for me.
Then theres the time I couldn't drink, like when at work, the long longing feeling of the evening would never come, then the locking myself away to down the vodka therefore making me useless to everyone for the rest of the day.
Those that know me know the rest, how having 2 kids finally convinced me to end the cycle of madness, can I ever return to normal drinking.
I never ever had normal drinking in the first place.
People who can drink normally would never even consider looking at a place like Sober Recovery as far as I'm concerned.
For anyone considering trying Normal drinking or an experiment, my advice for what its worth is don't.
Got me thinking today though, what exactly is " normal " drinking ?
When, if ever, did I drink normally ?
I first tasted alcohol aged 16/17, did most of my drinking either in the park or on buses to football matches, mostly cheap lager or cider.
Looking back I suppose at that time I was still drinking " normally ".
I think though I started down the road to where my problems lay. Where I was always different to everyone else, although I thought I was so much cleverer than them was, the day after a big night out.
Where everyone else would happily spend the day suffering from a hangover I'd simply just start drinking again, never could understand how people could suffer when they could just carry right on.
The result, I'd often still be feeling rough the thusday after a saturday night out after drinking through the week. Often just getting over one weekend in time for the next. Normal drinking !!!!!
Soon started the 15 years I spent drinking in secret ater that, beer to start with but pretty soon realised the empties were too hard to hide and moved on to half bottles of vodka. While still living at home with my parents I was pouring vodka into coke bottles and drinking them under the guise of drinking a soft drink.
When I moved away it got easier to drink, while sharing a house I was openly drinking every night, so was everyone else I told myself, looking back though I was drinking more, topping up when nobody was looking, getting drinks for everyone but pouring an extra one for myself.
Then it was back with my parents for a while, the secret drinking every day continued until I moved in with my now wife. Didn't drink in secret for a while but wasn't long before I was, needed more than I was willing to own up to drinking.
By that time I was drinking a minimum of a half bottle of vodka every day, I remember being on a boat trip off the Island of Rhodes, probably 2001, I remember choking for a drink, went to the bar and got a beer for me and my wife, went to a bar on another deck so she couldn't see and ordered a double vodka as well, downed that then back with the beers, spent the rest of what should have been an enjoyable day in the sun sneaking about, think I actually claimed I had a dodgy stomach and had to keep going to the toilet when what I was really doing was nipping back to the bar for more Vodka.
I've spent the last 20 odd years when I think about it, lyeing, being secretive, worring that others were drinking too slow, drinking before nights out cos I knew nobody else would drink enough for me.
Then theres the time I couldn't drink, like when at work, the long longing feeling of the evening would never come, then the locking myself away to down the vodka therefore making me useless to everyone for the rest of the day.
Those that know me know the rest, how having 2 kids finally convinced me to end the cycle of madness, can I ever return to normal drinking.
I never ever had normal drinking in the first place.
People who can drink normally would never even consider looking at a place like Sober Recovery as far as I'm concerned.
For anyone considering trying Normal drinking or an experiment, my advice for what its worth is don't.
OMG everything's real
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: England
Posts: 4,020
I drank normally while I was married to an alcoholic. Then I drank normally when I had a serious relationship with an addict/alcoholic.
The only thing normal about it was that they made my drinking look OK. I remember my ex b/f giving up for a week, and I was so happy he was finally sorting his problem out.
Until about day 3, and I was gagging for a drink. Of course, I had to drink it in secret so that I didn't trigger his drinking, because he was the one with the problem, not me. lol!!
Denial, I think that's called.
The only thing normal about it was that they made my drinking look OK. I remember my ex b/f giving up for a week, and I was so happy he was finally sorting his problem out.
Until about day 3, and I was gagging for a drink. Of course, I had to drink it in secret so that I didn't trigger his drinking, because he was the one with the problem, not me. lol!!
Denial, I think that's called.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: north yorkshire, england
Posts: 1,891
Its been a long time since I believed I could drink normally, after the fifeteenth or sixteenth try it finally sank into what i call a brain.
For the last few years the choice for me has been abstinence or giving up on everything and embracing the inner down and out.
I've drank more than a few times but I don't think I ever did it in an effort to be normal, of course I can't remember because I was hammered.
Currently I do believe that it is possible for me to abstain from drinking for the rest of my life, which is what it will take for me to have any kind of life.
Some people don't believe there is such a thing as a normal drinker, there are I know some of them, I also know that I can never be one of them.
I agree with Fizzy, if you are on this site it is unlikely (I won't say impossible) that you can be a normal drinker and is it worth the risk to try.
For the last few years the choice for me has been abstinence or giving up on everything and embracing the inner down and out.
I've drank more than a few times but I don't think I ever did it in an effort to be normal, of course I can't remember because I was hammered.
Currently I do believe that it is possible for me to abstain from drinking for the rest of my life, which is what it will take for me to have any kind of life.
Some people don't believe there is such a thing as a normal drinker, there are I know some of them, I also know that I can never be one of them.
I agree with Fizzy, if you are on this site it is unlikely (I won't say impossible) that you can be a normal drinker and is it worth the risk to try.
To Thine Own Self Be True
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: So Cal
Posts: 1,946
Fizzy,
Thank you for this thread. Yup, nothing normal about me either and I ALWAYS knew I was different. You scared the crud out of me though with the title of this thread. I was devastated to think you were going back to drinking. You can't! Two weeks from Monday we have 9 months!
Thank you for this thread. Yup, nothing normal about me either and I ALWAYS knew I was different. You scared the crud out of me though with the title of this thread. I was devastated to think you were going back to drinking. You can't! Two weeks from Monday we have 9 months!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,439
Thanks Fizzy.
Yeah I have no idea what normal drinking is - to me drinking is, and always was, to drink as much as I can, hide my drinking and lie about it...usually find myself in all manner of trouble doing it.....wake up and do it again....and again...and again...until I got sick.
Then I'd feel better eventually.....and to back to drinking...
Why would I want to return to that?
D
Yeah I have no idea what normal drinking is - to me drinking is, and always was, to drink as much as I can, hide my drinking and lie about it...usually find myself in all manner of trouble doing it.....wake up and do it again....and again...and again...until I got sick.
Then I'd feel better eventually.....and to back to drinking...
Why would I want to return to that?
D
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,780
I started out almost two years ago drinking one glass of wine before the kids got home from high school so I wouldn't get sucked into a fight with them. It didn't take long before I was drinking after they were home, then not long until I was drinking long before they came home. It took me a matter of a few months to fall into alcoholism. I denied it tho and kept on drinking, even drinking when I woke up to stop the shakes. Then I knew I had a serious problem, tho it took me many months after that to actually stop.
I cannot drink normally. I had too many relapses where I tried to moderate or taper down but it never worked for me. I am not a normal drinker, I'm an alcoholic and cannot drink at all.
I cannot drink normally. I had too many relapses where I tried to moderate or taper down but it never worked for me. I am not a normal drinker, I'm an alcoholic and cannot drink at all.
getting there
Join Date: May 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 1,314
I have certainly never been a normal drinker either. In fact, I don't understand the point of normal drinking. I started out in college drinking to get drunk and that's what I've always done. Why would I only want a glass or two of wine? I don't get it.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: kelowna, b.c.
Posts: 74
Colagirl I am right there with you. What is the point of drinking one or two?? I've never drank for the pure taste, I drank to feel to buzz. It's not like we see too many people downing six straight cokes just for the hell of it.
Psalm 118:24
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ILLINOIS
Posts: 15,203
It's not a return to normal drinking, it's trying to go back to drinking with out the consequences that, occur after drinking in the present!!!!
It's drinking without the fight with the spouse, calling in sick at work, getting a DUI, a fight in the bar, making a total @ss of yourself in a public place while drunk.
Any and all of the above.
It's drinking without the fight with the spouse, calling in sick at work, getting a DUI, a fight in the bar, making a total @ss of yourself in a public place while drunk.
Any and all of the above.
Psalm 118:24
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: ILLINOIS
Posts: 15,203
Originally Posted by jsml1234 
Hey Capt.
Always enjoy your wisdom.
Salute.
<><
Always enjoy your wisdom.
Salute.
<><
It's that illusion, we can have that drink or two and be merry and enjoy an evening out on the town. Every time out in the latter part of our drinking we still think, this time, this time, it's going to be different.
And, it never is, it never is.
Had a guy come to the meeting last night. he got out of his car in the shadows. I saw him toss something into the church yard. When, he got into the light, I knew who it was. He appeared to be in a bad shape.
What kind of demons are going thru your mind drunk at a meting, I can't begin to fathom.
After the meeting, I told my buddy that rode with me to help look for what ever it was he tossed out. It was a half drank beer. I picked it up in the dark and in the dark, smelled it. Sure enough, it was a beer. After all these years, my mouth started watering just over the aroma of that beer.
How over powering is that???
It reminded me of the movie Ghost where Swayze kicks a can and breaks the glass to the cigarette machine. Schiavelli looks down at all the packs of cigarettes lying there and says, I'd give anything for a drag!!
Just for that moment, I'd of gave anything for a sip of that beer
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Well...
I don't think drinking alcohol is normal.
Regardless of how much or who does it...or when or why..
alcohol is a toxin.
This is from my files...
I have absoutely no plans to poison myself again.
I don't think drinking alcohol is normal.
Regardless of how much or who does it...or when or why..
alcohol is a toxin.
This is from my files...
What is moderation?
According to the U.S. Center for Disease Control
Moderate drinking is no more than
2 drinks a day for men..1 for women
They consider a drink to be
12 oz. of beer..5 oz. of wine...1 1/2 oz of liquor.
Your body and mind processes all 3 toxins equally
so drinking only wine or only liquor or only beer
or mixing them is of no importance.
They all do the same damage.
According to the U.S. Center for Disease Control
Moderate drinking is no more than
2 drinks a day for men..1 for women
They consider a drink to be
12 oz. of beer..5 oz. of wine...1 1/2 oz of liquor.
Your body and mind processes all 3 toxins equally
so drinking only wine or only liquor or only beer
or mixing them is of no importance.
They all do the same damage.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 38
I know people who are 'normal' drinkers; a good friend of mine would meet us at the bar and nurse one and only one Guiness for an hour and a half while I would have had three beers and two shots in the same time period. My wife decides once every 10 days or so, "I think I want a drink", mixes up one and only one, and that's it for another 10-14 days.
I'm on Day 3 right now and it's freaking killing me, but even still I can't help the thought from coming into my head "Just dry out and clean up for a few months, then you'll be able to become a normal drinker".
Sounds great, lots of people do it.
I just don't know if I can.
I'm on Day 3 right now and it's freaking killing me, but even still I can't help the thought from coming into my head "Just dry out and clean up for a few months, then you'll be able to become a normal drinker".
Sounds great, lots of people do it.
I just don't know if I can.
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