TheWonkydonkey

Well i'm back home, been to the store where i'd normally buy beer and just bought milk and bread. Had a little glance and smile at the aisle where they have the booze..

Not in a "aaah my old friend" kind of way

more a "I don't fooking think so pal!" kind of way

I'm looking forward to having a nice relaxing Saturday evening and then waking up refreshed on Sunday. Can't remember the last time that happened

lovinmenow

Go Wonky Go!!!!

ackkk

Hey dude,

I appreciate your posts. Don't know if you've encountered it, and I'm sure it's been brought up frequently around here, but Rational Recovery is a cool resource. RR discourages friendly interactions like this, but it has helped me, and I personally don't feel weaker for interacting.

You have fixed your addicted mind, and the good feeling is more than a pink cloud. I know the feeling of wondering about what others' think...it remains the weirdest part for me; but my encounters have been fine, even without having a pregnant friend to hang out with.

Thanks for your candor.

Ackkk

TheWonkydonkey

Thanks ackkk.

It helps me so much being able to be so open and honest on this forum.

I don't know any other way to be, I guess its just who I am. I'm just pleased my rambling nonsense seems to help others as well as myself!

Pixy1

Wonky we love your rambling nonsense and yes it does help.

TheWonkydonkey

:ghug3

lostbutterfly

Few more weeks of sobriety and the gym and you will be looking like this hot little a$$ right here!!

TheWonkydonkey

Ah the great mule and donkey show. Fond memories

So much hot ass in one place

TheWonkydonkey

Well I made it to the end of Saturday night. Very quiet night at home.

Had a couple of random thoughts about how boring it is not drinking (yeah right drinking is exciting.....) and my birthday is coming up and started trying to think through how a sober birthday would look & feel.

Nothing thats a problem though, just flashing thoughts. Not going to dwell on the negatives.

Hope you all had a good saturday night!

Pixy1

What would you like to do for your birthday? Plan something in advance that doesn't involve alcohol.

Those bloody thoughts just creep up on you dont they

I'm supposed to be going to a leaving party on Wednesday Tut!!

TheWonkydonkey

Want my advice Pixx?, drive...

I was supposed to be going to a football game and then onto a beer festival (!) for my birthday. Hmmm let me think... shall I go..

Obviously I won't be going to the beer festival!!!

I think i'm gonna go out for a nice meal with my wife and a couple of friends (one of which doesn't drink...I've always thought she was weird but she's perfect for this!!!!)

Its about choices isn't it? If I put myself in a impossible position then i'll drink.

So what do I do?

I don't put myself into that position. If i think there's a chance i'll drink I won't go.

I just can't risk it. I do feel totally different this time but I'm not going to play Russian roulette to see if I get lucky.

Day 4, I'm sleeping so deeply its wonderful to wake up refreshed.

Rusty Zipper

Wd and the lies we told so often, they turned into truths...

keep at it donkey, before you turn in too a jackass...

Pixy1

I cant drive it is just round the corner lol well I could but it's quicker to walk. I think I will give it a miss. Like you if I put myself in that position I will drink and as Fizzy said I have to put some effort into this.

Fulldresser4

Oh, dear Wonkydonkey from Donkeyville....you are bringing me such joy and happiness watching your journey unfold before our eyes....And making me

"Ah the great mule and donkey show. Fond memories

So much hot ass in one place"

Just a tip though...whatever you do, DON'T google inflatable donkeys...it isn't pretty.
(I know, I'm sick and twisted. But really, it's not MY fault...)

And one last thing, though I'll get flamed for this -- try to be as kind and gentle as you can with Mrs. Wonky...she's been through he## and back with the old, evil Wonky, and needs lots of hugs and kisses, although I'm really not sure what kind of lips Wonkys have.

Fulldresser4

....and for sure DON'T google hot donkey ass.....

FizzyWater

Way I see it, anyone can drink, anyone can not drink.

Just the way you process the thoughts that makes the difference.

Deep down if you really want to drink more than you don't want to drink then you will.

Simple, just everything else going on in your head that makes it difficult.

Pixy1

Fiz you make it sound so easy

least

It's not easy, but it is simple. Yesterday I wanted to drink more than I wanted to stay sober. Big mistake. Today I'm starting over. I found out - again - that I CANNOT just have one or two glasses of wine, it's always the whole damn bottle.

TheWonkydonkey

Its just about simple choices isn't it?

18 months I've known I was a alcoholic...probably more if I'm a little more honest.

During that time I've had several bouts of sobriety. Lasting upwards of 3(!) weeks sometimes. Every time I've drunk its because I've CHOSEN to drink. I didn't suddenly come to with a beer in my hand, I didn't get abducted by boozey aliens and force fed ale. I made a choice to drink.

Now you could start to give all manner of reasons about being in a difficult position and all that garbage but the simple truth is... I chose to drink.

If I go to a bar with all my friends who drink and don't take the car, i'll sit their miserable as sin and then eventually break and drink. Of course afterwards I can have the guilt of drinking and feel even worse.

I feel like I have honestly tried everything, I'm trying something different this time.

I'm choosing not to drink!




Full dresser, you weren't lying about the google searches!!!!!

Fubarcdn

I agree with you Wonky. For me having the first one is a choice and even having the second one is a choice but having the third not so much. So I have to choose not to have the first . I wish that wasn't the case but what it is is what it is.