re: alcoholic thinking and daydreaming
 

Everything in moderation. Anyone else here have a history of excessive daydreaming? Daydreaming itself is fine, like the Blondie lyrics go, "dreaming is free." It becomes a problem when you give more significance to your fantasy world than the real world. This has been one of my problems over the years. I would just go through the motions in the "real world," at the same time living in a fantasy world in my head. Just plain daydreaming, imagining myself living in a seperate set of circumstances, any would do as long as it was suffienciently different from the "real world." Drinking was part of the escape, it helped me to get lost further into the fantasy.

Since I chose to activiely pursue some kind of serious recovery, I have had to conciously keep myself from daydreaming and it is so hard and frustrating. Many alcoholics/addicts have a hard time dealing with reality in early recovery but I wonder if it is because they too daydreamed all the time, or is it just the fact that we have to become more responsible? What does dealing with reality in sobriety mean to you?

I too daydream a lot, always have, like to live inside my own head. I don't enjoy living in reality as much as living in my head but am getting more used to it. It helps to be sober to deal with every day life, tho.

Daydreaming? I do it A LOT.

Too much? No... as long as I can separate fiction from reality I'm okay (I can).

I love to take little trips in my mind. I really don't think it is much different than becoming engrossed in a novel or a movie.

We all deserve a (sober, lol) break from reality now and then, right?

(When I play my music in a dark or candlelit room I feel like I leave the planet, lol ;))

Yeah, I daydream - that I am walking along the edige of the ocean.

It brings me so much peace! It helps me get through the long waits in a drs office or sitting on the subway.

I too have always been a daydreamer. I think I stay pretty grounded, but I definitely do wander off into mental la-la land from time to time. Of course, leave it to me to even imagine the worst in my daydreams! So, for me, drinking not only helped me escape reality, it helped me escape things that hadn't even happened... :wtf2

*sigh* I'm still trying to figure that one out. I just figured out a few days ago that drinking was my coping mechanism, so right now I still feel pretty lost and useless.

Son Ofa B**** Everything's Real!!!!

Right?

I daydream a lot too.. I don't think it's bad, as long as you know the difference between reality and dreaming. It's fun! Then I try to make my life fun too! :)

Daydream about what? I agree that daydreaming is healthy, it's fun to mentally drift off and think about the healthy activities that I'm not always able to pursue because of time restrictions. Hiking, stargazing, cooking, motorcycling, music, paintball, etc. Yep, my mind wanders just about every day thinking about the next time I'll be able to do those things.

But there are times too when I daydream about how good an ice cold beer would taste, or how much I'd like a jug of cheap wine with my pizza, or how sophisticated I thought I was when I drank an expensive bourbon or scotch. Next thing I know I'm thinking that it might be safe for me to take a drink. So I'd say it's probably not good for me to romanticize those things too much.

I agree some daydreaming is fine and healthy, it is escapism and a natural coping mechinism in itself. I think that like all coping mechinisms, it can be overused and we can become too dependent on it.

Maybe I'm making too big a deal about it, it is good to be grounded in reality which I am trying to do.

I've always held the false belief that we are only products of our genes and our environment and it was basically imposible to change since all change came from stimuli from our environment. What I didnt realize was my ability to have a say over many aspects of who I am. My thinking can be changed if I work hard enough on it. Negative thoughts can seem like a tidal wave sometimes, and you cant fight a tidal wave.

I daydream too - always have, long before I took a beer...but I get where you're coming from Fel - when daydreams become preferable to real life, you've got a problem.

Little steps and one day at a time are two good mantras here I think.

Real life *is* scary - especially to ppl like us who've run from it for so long - but just take it easy - no need to scare yourself to death...

I figure as long as we're not avoiding reality (or problems or responsibilities) or daydreaming of ice cold beers (thanks Astro :lmao) we're doing ok :)

Balance is good :)
D

'Catastrophizing' is one of my big things too Felly...

I have to make the effort to stop, breath and try and look at things dispassionately - why do I feel this way? what are the core reasons behind it? is it really as bad as it seems? what can I do right now to fix things?

it's not easy, but I'm making progress :)

D

I daydream a lot. My earliest memory was when I was 9 and watching the '76 Olympics on TV - they were in Montreal that year. I saw Nadia Comaneci perform for the first time and was lost in her routine, and in the music. I remember telling my Mom and Dad I was going to bed - and how perplexed they were. But I just wanted to lie alone in the dark and remember what I watched that night.

Today, I often listen to music on my iPod or in my car and imagine I am singing to an audience - or auditioning for American Idol :lmao never mind that I am Canadian and can't hold a tune.

I'm firmly grounded in reality, but that doesn't mean I can't have my mental health moments.

I am daydreaming about being beside Sonky's pool in Australia. It is still freezing here. Not even the dogsleds are running up here in Canada today.:rolleyes::turn:

Well, that is a tough one as I have always been a daydreamer. That being said, I finally recognize that I've been living in an alcoholic fantasy for the last two odd years. Giving up the fantasy has been very difficult.