Question: How many have maintained sobriety without F2F meetings?
peaceful seabird
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: floating
Posts: 4,822
Hi Snowdog!
I don't do AA meetings. I am on day 135 sober.
I do appreciate the progress and life skills shared here by my fellow SR peeps who do attend AA meetings, as well as a co-worker that attends AA.
What ever works, keep on keeping on!
I don't do AA meetings. I am on day 135 sober.
I do appreciate the progress and life skills shared here by my fellow SR peeps who do attend AA meetings, as well as a co-worker that attends AA.
What ever works, keep on keeping on!
Om, Aum, Ohm...
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Punxsutawney/Pittsburgh
Posts: 4,797
Originally Posted by James13 
I think this is what AA is about- growth as a person to stay sober. This is done by changing the way one percieves things, and treats the alcohol abuse as a symptom of a bigger problem, which is what AA addresses. It has spiritual components, many of which I have found highly useful in my changing lifestyle and spirituality.
Also, I have to add that the higher power concept I do understand, but I cannot be as dogmatic about it as others. I understand that there is a higher power than ourselves, that is the way of the universe. It does put things into perspective, and it is comforting to know that a greater force dictates everything, whether it is seen as God, the universe, or whatever. A "higher power than ourselves" does put tings in perspective.
Peace & Love,
Sugah
Moving out of Limbo
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Today
Posts: 343
Originally Posted by Classical
Wow, James13. What a post.
I've had an ongoing struggle over the years with exactly what you're talking about concerning the "higher power" concept. I would enjoy a dialogue about this and how it relates to alcoholism.
First, I'm a hopeless bookworm, especially when it comes to the subject of belief. A few years ago, when I was well over my head reading the writings of evolutionary biologists like Dawkins, my proclivity to drink alcohol worsened dramatically. I started to think that if "this is indeed all there is," then why should I hold back and not "enjoy" everything without remorse, including alcohol consumption?
My answer eventually came as I realized that, belief in God or a Higher Power or no, alcoholism is a sure way of self-destruction. Right now, though, I cannot help but relating to people of faith, because I can't control this by my own internal strength and am relying on a strength of what I consider a "high power."
Classical
I've had an ongoing struggle over the years with exactly what you're talking about concerning the "higher power" concept. I would enjoy a dialogue about this and how it relates to alcoholism.
First, I'm a hopeless bookworm, especially when it comes to the subject of belief. A few years ago, when I was well over my head reading the writings of evolutionary biologists like Dawkins, my proclivity to drink alcohol worsened dramatically. I started to think that if "this is indeed all there is," then why should I hold back and not "enjoy" everything without remorse, including alcohol consumption?
My answer eventually came as I realized that, belief in God or a Higher Power or no, alcoholism is a sure way of self-destruction. Right now, though, I cannot help but relating to people of faith, because I can't control this by my own internal strength and am relying on a strength of what I consider a "high power."
Classical
What I am thinking now is that behavior emptied my life. It's all about the ride, right? I always assumed enjoying the ride meant gratifying myself. That kind of thing gets out of control quickly for me, no matter what it is. I have noticed that I haven't just accepted things as they are. There has always been something better around the corner for me to indulge in. Is that living?
Yes, like you, I can relate better to people of faith right now. I was never lured into this from promotion. I now seem more attracted to the idea of just accepting life on it's terms. Takes faith to do that, imo, because "my way" of dealing with life has left me feeing like a shell of a person.
I always heard the ticker-tape faith lingo, and shunned it. But to write off any speak about a higher power seems really narrow to me now. I can't control everything, but I consciously or subconsciously thought I could. I just want to be content with what life is. Faith in a greater power than myself I am starting to have.
I'm glad I can relate to you. Thanks.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 176
Thanks for this Thread Snowdog
Thanks for starting this thread. I haven't been to a meeting yet either (on day7) and was wondering the same thing. All the replies have really helped me. You are off to an incredible start....keep it up!!!
Moving out of Limbo
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Today
Posts: 343
Originally Posted by Sugah
Yes! "Alcohol is but a symptom!"
We're not all dogmatic! Not by a long shot. As a matter of fact, the folks I know who seem to be most at peace in their recovery are not dogmatic but are tolerant of those who express and exercise their spirituality by religious practice. "Open-minded" is the term that comes to mind.
Peace & Love,
Sugah
We're not all dogmatic! Not by a long shot. As a matter of fact, the folks I know who seem to be most at peace in their recovery are not dogmatic but are tolerant of those who express and exercise their spirituality by religious practice. "Open-minded" is the term that comes to mind.
Peace & Love,
Sugah
Tolerance is much more than wearing a "tolerance hat", isn't it? I have to have as much compassion in my life as possible, inward and outward. I find myself so much more happy this way- trying day by day to not judge others, because I have not lived their life.
This spiritual practice you speak of is so relevant. Because it is exactly what you say- practice. Not perfection. When I try perfection, I will always fall short.
Much love. Thanks.
Om, Aum, Ohm...
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Punxsutawney/Pittsburgh
Posts: 4,797
To James & Classical:
I think you should start another thread. It's an interesting discussion you have going, and I'm sure it would be of interest to many. Perhaps in the Spirituality forum?
Peace & Love,
Sugah
I think you should start another thread. It's an interesting discussion you have going, and I'm sure it would be of interest to many. Perhaps in the Spirituality forum?
Peace & Love,
Sugah
Moving out of Limbo
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Today
Posts: 343
Originally Posted by Sugah
To James & Classical:
I think you should start another thread. It's an interesting discussion you have going, and I'm sure it would be of interest to many. Perhaps in the Spirituality forum?
Peace & Love,
Sugah
I think you should start another thread. It's an interesting discussion you have going, and I'm sure it would be of interest to many. Perhaps in the Spirituality forum?
Peace & Love,
Sugah
Much love
everything is already ok
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Melbourne Victoria Australia
Posts: 19,789
I am a membe of NA and its working for me and I think that is the point. If it did not work I would do whatever I had to to get the support I need to stay clean and grow
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 49
Thanks for this post Snowdog. I've been wanting to ask the same question!! Just to hear people say they have been sober without AA gives me some hope that I can do this
without AA. Although I have been to AA and the face to face is great...it's just not for me. Thanks to you and thanks to all that responded. I have hope right now, hope that I didn't have this morning...
without AA. Although I have been to AA and the face to face is great...it's just not for me. Thanks to you and thanks to all that responded. I have hope right now, hope that I didn't have this morning...
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: UK
Posts: 263
What a fantastic post, opening up so many avenues of thought. Many years ago I went to several AA meetings with a friend who had at that time probably 10 years recovery with them, but I just could not deal with it.
I've japed about those awful people in those awful buildings in another post somewhere, but of course that's not what I thought. What I really thought was awesome people (in awful buildings) - but I simply could not participate.
Sadly, I was alarmed and intimidated, never once saying a word in maybe five meetings all told - certainly not during the "meetings", though in the after-meeting fun knees-ups I may have had a chat or two over a soft garibaldi and a tiny cup of tea. By then, though, of course people had lost their mystique. Indeed all ponderous and solemn demeanour had gone, and as the curtains swished open we were instantly transported into some awkwardly contrived soiree that left everyone wishing that someone else would be the first to head for the car.
In an effort to be entertaining (for some reason, hmmm) I'm definitely coming across more harshly than I mean to be about the AA. I know the wonders that the organisation and its principles have worked on people I have known personally, so there's no need for anyone to leap to their defence. It didn't suit me at that time, but I've heard it said that there is nothing to stop me from going back and trying again. I still keep that card in my hand.
I've japed about those awful people in those awful buildings in another post somewhere, but of course that's not what I thought. What I really thought was awesome people (in awful buildings) - but I simply could not participate.
Sadly, I was alarmed and intimidated, never once saying a word in maybe five meetings all told - certainly not during the "meetings", though in the after-meeting fun knees-ups I may have had a chat or two over a soft garibaldi and a tiny cup of tea. By then, though, of course people had lost their mystique. Indeed all ponderous and solemn demeanour had gone, and as the curtains swished open we were instantly transported into some awkwardly contrived soiree that left everyone wishing that someone else would be the first to head for the car.
In an effort to be entertaining (for some reason, hmmm) I'm definitely coming across more harshly than I mean to be about the AA. I know the wonders that the organisation and its principles have worked on people I have known personally, so there's no need for anyone to leap to their defence. It didn't suit me at that time, but I've heard it said that there is nothing to stop me from going back and trying again. I still keep that card in my hand.
Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxnard (The Nard), CA, USA.
Posts: 13,900
I no longer attend AA meetings mostly because of the AA program. I like the people I have meet when I did attend the meetings...its just that the AA program is not going in the same direction I'm headed today as a Buddhist type. I'm working to free myself of attachments and I feel a belief in higher powers is just another attachment that I will work to be free from. I do believe the AA program can be extremely helpful to most all that welcome it into there lives.
For me the key to a well balanced life free from alcohol is through a holistic approach. IMO Addiction treatment is but one aspect of a total commitment to balanced wellness of the mind, body and spirit.
For me the key to a well balanced life free from alcohol is through a holistic approach. IMO Addiction treatment is but one aspect of a total commitment to balanced wellness of the mind, body and spirit.
not a greeter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: padmasana
Posts: 13,927
Originally Posted by dgillz
AA meetings are nothing like what you see on TV or the movies. I have never seen a podium at an AA meeting (they always have them on TV AA meetings), and you never have to say a word if you don't want to.
Here is a great link on what to expect in your first AA meeting, it is very accurate and should be a "must read" before attending IMHO:
Your First AA Meeting
Here is a great link on what to expect in your first AA meeting, it is very accurate and should be a "must read" before attending IMHO:
Your First AA Meeting
I didn't go to any meetings at all after that. I've been alcohol free over 2 years now and use SR.
I have made many changes to my life along the way though and it hasn't always been easy, but it's been worthwhile.
I would never discourage anyone from going to meetings if you need or want to fwiw.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Columbus, OH
Posts: 37
Like numerous other people on this forum I have tried to quit numerous times. This time I feel like I have a greater resolve than I have at any point in the past. I'm using both AA meetings and SR and they both seem to serve a different purpose for me personally. I've gone to at least one meeting a day since I quit this time and it seems to serve for my purposes as a physical reminder of what I can achieve if I maintain this course of sobriety, and what could happen if I continued drinking because I can feel the people and look into their eyes and see the hurt.
At the same time when I come on to these pages the info is so much more abundant not just in quanity, but also in quality. People here seem so much more willing to truly open up and share their feelings, than they would if they were in front of those they were speaking with. I think that is great because honesty is the only thing that will allow me to come out of this period in my life and continue to grow and live the life I want to live. I have been to dozens of AA meetings in the past and have never said a word, but when I come on here I feel that I can at least work up the courage to say a little bit about how I feel and that has always been a struggle for me.
So I guess what I'm trying to say is that I personally need both, but AA by itself has not worked for me in the past. As I said, I have never had this strong of a resolve before and I would be lying if I said that the added support I get from SR did not have a major role to play in that. This place truly is awesome! Thank you all.
At the same time when I come on to these pages the info is so much more abundant not just in quanity, but also in quality. People here seem so much more willing to truly open up and share their feelings, than they would if they were in front of those they were speaking with. I think that is great because honesty is the only thing that will allow me to come out of this period in my life and continue to grow and live the life I want to live. I have been to dozens of AA meetings in the past and have never said a word, but when I come on here I feel that I can at least work up the courage to say a little bit about how I feel and that has always been a struggle for me.
So I guess what I'm trying to say is that I personally need both, but AA by itself has not worked for me in the past. As I said, I have never had this strong of a resolve before and I would be lying if I said that the added support I get from SR did not have a major role to play in that. This place truly is awesome! Thank you all.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Los Angeles, California
Posts: 8,326
For me, keeping in touch with my sobriety every day is necessary. I have to acknowledge the disease and know I have the 24 hours in front of me. I read something related every day too.
SR has been important to me. I get to see so many bright, articulate people discuss what has worked for them in their sober lives. I can relate to the stories!
I am so grateful to have this place and know I am not alone!
Thanks to you all!
Love,
Lenina
SR has been important to me. I get to see so many bright, articulate people discuss what has worked for them in their sober lives. I can relate to the stories!
I am so grateful to have this place and know I am not alone!
Thanks to you all!
Love,
Lenina
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
I attended AA when I was abusing opiates. It was during that time that I chose NOT to listen to my sponsor, hooked up with a crack user, and developed my own crack addiction. A few years later, I was able to get clean from crack.
This time I am using SR as my recovery group. I still use many of the principles I learned in AA, and I definitely believe in a higher power, but I always have. I think recovery is an individual thing, and that people should do what works for them.
I will have 22 months in a few more days. If what I'm doing stops working, I won't hesitate to go back to meetings or find something else to maintain my clean time. However, for today, SR and a few f2f friends/family works great for me.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
This time I am using SR as my recovery group. I still use many of the principles I learned in AA, and I definitely believe in a higher power, but I always have. I think recovery is an individual thing, and that people should do what works for them.
I will have 22 months in a few more days. If what I'm doing stops working, I won't hesitate to go back to meetings or find something else to maintain my clean time. However, for today, SR and a few f2f friends/family works great for me.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 1,876
I attended aa for about 10 months and decided to leave for many reasons. I am now sober coming on 20 months. Fear has been replaced with hope. The truth is many more people achieve sobriety without aa. SR is a wonderful addition to my life and I come here daily but it is not what keeps me sober...much to my surprise it is the belief in myself that does that.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: UK
Posts: 18,299
Originally Posted by snowdog
I have never gone to an AA meeting. Standing in front of a group and announcing I am an alcoholic is more than I can imaging doing.
As for maintaining sobriety without meetings, I have a feeling there is a huge silent majority who quit without AA or online support or anything whatever.
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