TryingSoHard

Keep it up sister!

Mark75

Way to go - day two!! We are pullin' for you.

Just go to one AA meeting, if you are not sure. You can always leave and not come back. If you didn't like your first meeting, try another group, maybe you'll like them better.

Don't worry about the higher power thing... the first step, the only one that mentions alcohol, and the most important one, doesn't mention God.

Mark

least

Glad you're back on Recovery Road!:ghug3

Eclipse

I'm not worried about the higher power. I just have this huge fear of walking into a meeting and everyone looking at me and knowing I am there for a reason. What if I know someone (stupid, I know). Maybe at that point I really have to admit that I am an alcoholic? I don't know. If you knew me you most likely would not know I even have a drinking problem. Only my close family and one friend even know I have a problem (and she still tells me I am fine even though I have come out and said "I think I have a drinking problem". I am supposed to be some super mom who helps out at school and runs committees for my kids athletic teams and has everything together (SO NOT). But I do notice I am getting more "out there" with drinking and drinking in situations or at events I would have never done before, and its really starting to scare me. Cuz like lots of us, once I get past a certain point there is no stopping me.

Mark75

I was a highly functioning active alcoholic. It wasn't until the end (I hope it was the end) of my drinking career that it was only my close friends who suspected.

You don't have to admit your an alcoholic... The only requirement for membership to AA or admission to a closed meeting is "the desire to quit drinking".

If you run into someone you know (I have, a couple of times, but I work with the public so I wasn't surprised...) they are there for the same reason you are.

Just don't drink today !!!

Mark

shanman422

Your on the right track Eclipse... Stay strong today!

Eclipse

THere is something about posting here that makes me feel so accountable. You are all my friends and I certainly don't want to let you down, and on the other hand, I know that if I do let you down, you will understand. I am just tired of the fight and if we all thought about it, and if we just let it go away and stop the insanity, how much better our lives would be. How much less stress, guilt, wondering, hating ourselves. I don't quite understand how we keep lettting it get us. I know I should be saying ME, but I know from lots of reading what you all are going through too.

The other day when I told my kids about my problem and my plan and then didn't follow through I had to hide the wine, cuz I told them something and couldn't go back on it...do you know how hard and how much effort I had to go through to open a bottle of wine and then hide it and then drink it without anyone knowing? How stupid and what stress I went through. And in the end when you drink 3 bottles of wine in one day...did I really think they didn't notice???? Surely done with it now. SICK AND TIRED!!!