Hey Everyone, I Think I Might Be An Alcoholic
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 2
Hey Everyone, I Think I Might Be An Alcoholic
So I've been sneaking drinks since I was around 16 and I'm 23 now and still sneaking them. Back in the day I used to get drunk often but today am still functional the vast majority of the time. In a given day between the moment I wake and go to bed I can consume 14 drinks without much of an issue (though by the end of the night I'm feeling it a bit and in the morning I have to have a drink or two to steady myself).
I can go out for a night of drinks at the bar and control myself well enough that I only have a couple and be able to drive home without a hitch; I've even been pulled over by a cop after one of these nights and let go with a warning to drive slower.
I have no problem not having a drink at first, but when I have one at any point I find myself confronted with the fact that I can't keep myself from not having another, which leads to having another and another and another.
My friends are all drinkers who manage their drinking well. All of our nights together usually involve a drink or two. My family also drinks often and every family function involves drinks. I've been OK with that as well. It's when I get alone that I have problems.
I can go out for a night on the down and only have a few drinks, but upon getting home I find myself having a six pack and/or shots of whiskey. I don't know why I do it. I don't want to do it, but I can't go to bed unless I do.
I find that I drink faster than everyone else and I get uncomfortable because I would rather finish the next drink than hold a conversation.
I also don't drink cheap. I LOVE good beer and the effort that goes into making an intricate microbrew. I have even brewed hundreds of bottles worth of my own beer. This makes it all more expensive than it should be, I suppose, if I were sucking down Natural Light or Crystal Palace gin. The fact that I spend a lot of my time creating drinks makes things much more difficult for me, because I feel like I have a connection to alcohol that most alcoholics do not. Of course, I realize that this could also be me tricking myself.
This post has been a hell of a lot longer than I ever meant it to be. But there it is.
<3
I can go out for a night of drinks at the bar and control myself well enough that I only have a couple and be able to drive home without a hitch; I've even been pulled over by a cop after one of these nights and let go with a warning to drive slower.
I have no problem not having a drink at first, but when I have one at any point I find myself confronted with the fact that I can't keep myself from not having another, which leads to having another and another and another.
My friends are all drinkers who manage their drinking well. All of our nights together usually involve a drink or two. My family also drinks often and every family function involves drinks. I've been OK with that as well. It's when I get alone that I have problems.
I can go out for a night on the down and only have a few drinks, but upon getting home I find myself having a six pack and/or shots of whiskey. I don't know why I do it. I don't want to do it, but I can't go to bed unless I do.
I find that I drink faster than everyone else and I get uncomfortable because I would rather finish the next drink than hold a conversation.
I also don't drink cheap. I LOVE good beer and the effort that goes into making an intricate microbrew. I have even brewed hundreds of bottles worth of my own beer. This makes it all more expensive than it should be, I suppose, if I were sucking down Natural Light or Crystal Palace gin. The fact that I spend a lot of my time creating drinks makes things much more difficult for me, because I feel like I have a connection to alcohol that most alcoholics do not. Of course, I realize that this could also be me tricking myself.
This post has been a hell of a lot longer than I ever meant it to be. But there it is.
<3
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,469
Hi,
Welcome!
If you find that you can't stop drinking once you start, that is definitely a sign of alcoholism. I drank alone too, and convinced myself that doing that was 'normal'. Addiction doesn't discriminate as far as the cost or quality of the alcohol.
I'm glad you found us here at SR. If you decide to stop drinking, you'll find lots of support and information here.
Welcome!
If you find that you can't stop drinking once you start, that is definitely a sign of alcoholism. I drank alone too, and convinced myself that doing that was 'normal'. Addiction doesn't discriminate as far as the cost or quality of the alcohol.
I'm glad you found us here at SR. If you decide to stop drinking, you'll find lots of support and information here.
On the road of happy destiny
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: OHIO
Posts: 210
Originally Posted by Pharazon 
I don't want to stop drinking as much as I want to control it.
Is that impossible?
Is that impossible?
"If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking, you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic." That's from the Big Book and it is extremely true for me and many, many others here.
Anyway, welcome! Stick around and keep posting.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,469
That's a question that many of us have asked. If you are an addict, it is not possible to control your drinking. I spent a year, determined to manage my intake, and it never lasted. I would cut back, then drink more and in the end I was worse off, than when I began. And, I obsessed about alcohol all the time during that period - when would I drink, how much, etc. It was a relief to stop drinking.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 4,682
I have lots of normal drinking friends, the type that drink on special occasions and maybe every other friday...even one beer if there is one left over in the fridge from the bbq they may have hosted the previous weekend...you get the picture...and wanted to know if any of them would come to a help site, counseller, AA etc. Anyways to cut it short none of them would, none of them understand why they ever would and none of them have ever worried about their drinking save nursing a hangover every now and then from over indulgence.
IMO If you are even thinking you may have a problem with alcohol then you do, as for the definition of alcoholic it worth having a look around at SR for more info but it doesn't sound good to me (well actually it is very good for you as you have realised so young!). Hope you figure it out and keep coming back here:-)
IMO If you are even thinking you may have a problem with alcohol then you do, as for the definition of alcoholic it worth having a look around at SR for more info but it doesn't sound good to me (well actually it is very good for you as you have realised so young!). Hope you figure it out and keep coming back here:-)
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,757
Once I realized drinking was a big problem I tried to drink less. Couldn't do it. I always ended up drinking the whole bottle. I just couldn't control it. Giving it up altogether is the only way for me to go. And I don't miss the misery caused by my drinking.
Welcome to a good place for support and experience.:ghug3
Welcome to a good place for support and experience.:ghug3
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
From my files....
Conrolled drinking? Try to only have 2 drinks a day for 30 days.
A drink consists of a......
12 oz veer..5 oz. wine or 1 1/2 shot of liquor.
Then you can decide if controlled drinking is for you.
I hope you find a way to quit drinking.
It really is going to get worse if you don't....IMO
Welcome to SR...:
Here's how alcoholism typically progresses:
SOCIAL DRINKERS — Most Americans are characterized as social drinkers. Statistics indicate, however, that one of every 16 drinkers will become alcoholic.
WARNING SIGNS — The individual begins to drink more frequently and more than his associates. He drinks for confidence or to tolerate or escape problems. No party or other occasion is complete without a couple of drinks. Driving and drinking become routine.
EARLY ALCOHOLISM — With increasing frequency, the individual drinks too much. "Blackouts," or temporary amnesia, occur during or following drinking episodes. He drinks more rapidly than others, sneaks drinks and in other ways conceals the quantity that he drinks. He resents any reference to his drinking habits.
BASIC ALCOHOLISM — The individual begins to lose control as to the time, place and amount of his drinking. He gets drunk unintentionally. He hides and protects his liquor supply. He drinks to overcome the hangover from his prior drinking. He tries new patterns of drinking as to time and place of drinking. He attempts cures by moving to new locations or by changing his drinking companions.
CHRONIC ALCOHOLISM — The individual becomes a loner in his drinking. He develops alibis, excuses and rationalizations to cover up or explain his drinking. Personality and behavior changes occur that affect all relationships — family, employment, community. Extended binges, physical tremors, hallucinations and delirium, complete rejection of social reality, malnutrition with accompanying illness and disease and early death all occur as chronic alcoholism progresses.
Source: American Medical Association
SOCIAL DRINKERS — Most Americans are characterized as social drinkers. Statistics indicate, however, that one of every 16 drinkers will become alcoholic.
WARNING SIGNS — The individual begins to drink more frequently and more than his associates. He drinks for confidence or to tolerate or escape problems. No party or other occasion is complete without a couple of drinks. Driving and drinking become routine.
EARLY ALCOHOLISM — With increasing frequency, the individual drinks too much. "Blackouts," or temporary amnesia, occur during or following drinking episodes. He drinks more rapidly than others, sneaks drinks and in other ways conceals the quantity that he drinks. He resents any reference to his drinking habits.
BASIC ALCOHOLISM — The individual begins to lose control as to the time, place and amount of his drinking. He gets drunk unintentionally. He hides and protects his liquor supply. He drinks to overcome the hangover from his prior drinking. He tries new patterns of drinking as to time and place of drinking. He attempts cures by moving to new locations or by changing his drinking companions.
CHRONIC ALCOHOLISM — The individual becomes a loner in his drinking. He develops alibis, excuses and rationalizations to cover up or explain his drinking. Personality and behavior changes occur that affect all relationships — family, employment, community. Extended binges, physical tremors, hallucinations and delirium, complete rejection of social reality, malnutrition with accompanying illness and disease and early death all occur as chronic alcoholism progresses.
Source: American Medical Association
Conrolled drinking? Try to only have 2 drinks a day for 30 days.
A drink consists of a......
12 oz veer..5 oz. wine or 1 1/2 shot of liquor.
Then you can decide if controlled drinking is for you.
I hope you find a way to quit drinking.
It really is going to get worse if you don't....IMO
Welcome to SR...:
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