Giving it a try
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: NEW LENOX,IL
Posts: 61
Giving it a try
Hello, just starting out after 30+ years of drinking. The last few years were daily unless I was hung over. I'm not very social ,so I will not go to AA. This is the first time I ever attempted to quit. I think I can fight this mentally, but the phisical addiction is what I'm worried about. Any comments would be great. (entering day 3)
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,780
If you're going into day three, the worst of your withdrawal should be mostly over. Now comes the mental withdrawal. Learning new healthy habits to replace the old drinking-thinking ways. Come here often to read and post. If you get urges to drink, post about it and we'll do our best to talk you out of it. Welcome to a great place for support!:ghug3
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Brighton UK
Posts: 328
I'm on day 8 now, and it seems that all the physical withdrawals have gone. Yesterday I cruised a knife's edge in terms of mental craving but thankfully fought it off. I didn't see a doctor, but this seems to be standard advice as your brain chemistry is all fizzed up from the drinking and this can result in some serious complications. So be safe and get the required meds which will help you doze safely through the physical withdrawals. Best of luck with this.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,510
Welcome!
I'm glad you have decided to live a sober life.
You could talk to your dr if you're having physical concerns. I hope you feel better and that you keep reading and posting.
I'm glad you have decided to live a sober life.
You could talk to your dr if you're having physical concerns. I hope you feel better and that you keep reading and posting.
Drunkaholic
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Channelview, TX (Houston)
Posts: 514
I agree with least. I am waking up now to Day 15. I have visited here everyday. I read and I post where I need to and where I think I have something to contribute.
You say you are not social. I understand that, when I do get out people think I am charming and I get invites for more outings, but the truth is I like being alone. I wouldn't say alone all the time but most of the time.
So, in a way to get around the social part just post here. They start out one-sided conversations, but before you know it one of us will chime in and make it a conversation.
Stay strong ... I was a 30-year drinker too.
We can beat this and make a better life. Just remember after the NEW of quitting wears off it it up to us to make life exciting again without the booze. Start thinking of all the things you never did but wanted to and make a list. One day you will feel like getting that list out.
You say you are not social. I understand that, when I do get out people think I am charming and I get invites for more outings, but the truth is I like being alone. I wouldn't say alone all the time but most of the time.
So, in a way to get around the social part just post here. They start out one-sided conversations, but before you know it one of us will chime in and make it a conversation.
Stay strong ... I was a 30-year drinker too.
We can beat this and make a better life. Just remember after the NEW of quitting wears off it it up to us to make life exciting again without the booze. Start thinking of all the things you never did but wanted to and make a list. One day you will feel like getting that list out.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: NEW LENOX,IL
Posts: 61
thanks least and december15. I still have beer in the fridge,should I can it ,or is it stronger to fight knowing its in there. Also my wife drinks on the weekends. I don't think I should expect her to quit because of me. Is this dangerous?
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,510
I would get rid of the alcohol in the house.
I still don't ever have alcohol in the house, and that works for me.
You can talk with your wife about your drinking and she may be understanding, though it's hard for others to really get how difficult this is for us. If she drinks on the weekends, maybe you could be doing something else, in another room of the house, or go out for a long walk to help take your mind off things.
I still don't ever have alcohol in the house, and that works for me.
You can talk with your wife about your drinking and she may be understanding, though it's hard for others to really get how difficult this is for us. If she drinks on the weekends, maybe you could be doing something else, in another room of the house, or go out for a long walk to help take your mind off things.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: New York
Posts: 164
hi dojohn...and welcome! yes! get rid of all the alcohol in the house...when i was newly sober i had to stay away from everything and everyone associated with alcohol...too big of a temptation for this alkie! i would sit down and have a real serious conversation with your wife and tell here what your intentions are and how she can help you to achieve your sobriety...she might just surprise you and refrain from the drinking on weekends for a while just to see you sober...i know for my husband that was the case, he liked to drink but wasn't an alkie but stopped to support me...not everyone is the same but it can't hurt to be honest and see what happens! i wish you the best of luck in your journey and keep coming back there are so many wonderful people here with years of experience on the topic!! sobriety is amazing!! and oh yeah almost forgot...congrats on making it to day 3...keep up the good work!! Big Hugs! Lisa 
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Florida
Posts: 3
Good for you on wanting and/or trying to stop drinking. I too drank for years and years and years - it had become a problem long before I knew it. I was always shy and due to my drinking and drinking habits, had become very "not social". However, thru a series of events - I ended up at an AA meeting. Not where I had dreamed of being, but I was there. Because of AA and all I have learned & seen - I haven't had a drink since June of 2001. I know it isn't for everyone, but isn't anything worth a good try? All my ideas didn't get me anywhere - least of all sober. What do you have to lose by trying?
For me, the mental & spiritual recovery were more difficult than the physical. And there are so many things that really do help. If you are a praying person - pray, pray a lot. Write - write a lot. Do a gratitude list daily. Remind yourself that you ARE worth it. Chat with people here and ask questions. None of us can do this alone - not if we want to be happy about life.
I could go on & on, but you are in my thoughts and prayers. Focus on today and if you go to bed tonight without a drink...do it again tomorrow. I'm pulling for you.
For me, the mental & spiritual recovery were more difficult than the physical. And there are so many things that really do help. If you are a praying person - pray, pray a lot. Write - write a lot. Do a gratitude list daily. Remind yourself that you ARE worth it. Chat with people here and ask questions. None of us can do this alone - not if we want to be happy about life.
I could go on & on, but you are in my thoughts and prayers. Focus on today and if you go to bed tonight without a drink...do it again tomorrow. I'm pulling for you.
Thriving sober since 12/18/08
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Orlando, FL
Posts: 3,115
I agree with all that's been said. Get rid of it.. this is not a test, and it's not something to prove. Why do that? Pure torture..
I'm not very social either (when I'm sober), and I found AA wasn't for me, however.. I did attend a few meetings, you don't have to interact.. I just went, listened, drew strength from people who KNOW how to live a sober life, and went home feeling stronger.
It's a much better place to be than sitting at home thinking about the beer in the fridge, that's for sure.
Dump that stuff!
My husband never keeps alcohol here. He does still drink, I think it is dangerous (to answer your question) depending on your wife's drinking behavior. Would she keep liquor in the house? Changes have to be made, it's a whole new life! When my husband does drink, 99% of the time it's away from the house, with friends that I have no interest in hanging out with. If he drinks at home, which is rare, he only buys what he knows he'll drink that night (2 bottles of beer, a tiny shooter of whiskey.. etc), and it's GONE.
I even poured out my cooking wine and mouthwash.. never gone there, and never want to.
I'm not very social either (when I'm sober), and I found AA wasn't for me, however.. I did attend a few meetings, you don't have to interact.. I just went, listened, drew strength from people who KNOW how to live a sober life, and went home feeling stronger.
It's a much better place to be than sitting at home thinking about the beer in the fridge, that's for sure.
Dump that stuff!
My husband never keeps alcohol here. He does still drink, I think it is dangerous (to answer your question) depending on your wife's drinking behavior. Would she keep liquor in the house? Changes have to be made, it's a whole new life! When my husband does drink, 99% of the time it's away from the house, with friends that I have no interest in hanging out with. If he drinks at home, which is rare, he only buys what he knows he'll drink that night (2 bottles of beer, a tiny shooter of whiskey.. etc), and it's GONE.
I even poured out my cooking wine and mouthwash.. never gone there, and never want to.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Toronto, On
Posts: 11
Hi welcome! Glad you decided to join. I am new too. My DH doesn't drink very much but ocasionally likes to drink so he keeps some alcohol in the house but locks it up so I can't access it. This works well for me as it is hidden and out of the way.
I find going to a gym or just doing some form of exercise whether it be walking is a great replacement for drinking.
I find not carrying any money on me helps too so I am less tempted to stop at the beer store in the way home from work or somewhere. I will sign up for gift cards for myself so if I want to get a coffee I can get it on my gift card but I can't buy beer with it.
I try to go to bed early and get up early since my drinking was mainly in the evenings.
I guess just trying to replace old habits with new ones.
I find going to a gym or just doing some form of exercise whether it be walking is a great replacement for drinking.
I find not carrying any money on me helps too so I am less tempted to stop at the beer store in the way home from work or somewhere. I will sign up for gift cards for myself so if I want to get a coffee I can get it on my gift card but I can't buy beer with it.
I try to go to bed early and get up early since my drinking was mainly in the evenings.
I guess just trying to replace old habits with new ones.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 6,947
Hi - I was a drinker since I was 12 years old. Thats 39 years... Sober since September 14, 2008.
Glad you posted.
My wife still has one nightly white wine spritzer (tall one, but whose counting...) I have come to terms with it. Wasn't easy, I hoped she'd not drink in the house, at least for a while, but that wasn't to be. I can't drink, I am in a monitoring program for work, but I did have some resentment and other issues with it. I am mostly past it. Think of her as your best friend. If he wanted to have a drink, would you insist he not? Hey, that was one of my biggest rough spots - I felt like the bad little kid who couldn't do what the grown ups did... but now I just realize I was a drunk, not her. If I have to, I'll go to bed (that sucks, but you gotta do what you gotta do) or go to another room and log on here! But now I can sit with her and sip on some herbal tea... talk, watch TV. My sponsor says I should pour her one if the opportunity arises... well, not ready for that yet!
Get rid of the beer if that's what you drank. We had a party recently (planned last year!). The only thing about having alcohol out in the house that really made me feel weird was that case of beer I walked past in the garage. I used to NEVER walk past with out downing at least one... So, now, there is no freakin' beer in my house.
Good Luck ! Welcome. Maybe you'll get comfortable enough with recovery to get to a meeting, I think you'll find them non-threatening and very helpful.
Mark
Glad you posted.
My wife still has one nightly white wine spritzer (tall one, but whose counting
...) I have come to terms with it. Wasn't easy, I hoped she'd not drink in the house, at least for a while, but that wasn't to be. I can't drink, I am in a monitoring program for work, but I did have some resentment and other issues with it. I am mostly past it. Think of her as your best friend. If he wanted to have a drink, would you insist he not? Hey, that was one of my biggest rough spots - I felt like the bad little kid who couldn't do what the grown ups did... but now I just realize I was a drunk, not her. If I have to, I'll go to bed (that sucks, but you gotta do what you gotta do) or go to another room and log on here! But now I can sit with her and sip on some herbal tea... talk, watch TV. My sponsor says I should pour her one if the opportunity arises... well, not ready for that yet!Get rid of the beer if that's what you drank. We had a party recently (planned last year!). The only thing about having alcohol out in the house that really made me feel weird was that case of beer I walked past in the garage. I used to NEVER walk past with out downing at least one... So, now, there is no freakin' beer in my house.
Good Luck ! Welcome. Maybe you'll get comfortable enough with recovery to get to a meeting, I think you'll find them non-threatening and very helpful.
Mark
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Florida
Posts: 3
Good for you on wanting and/or trying to stop drinking. I too drank for years and years and years - it had become a problem long before I knew it. I was always shy and due to my drinking and drinking habits, had become very "not social". However, thru a series of events - I ended up at an AA meeting. Not where I had dreamed of being, but I was there. Because of AA and all I have learned & seen - I haven't had a drink since June of 2001. I know it isn't for everyone, but isn't anything worth a good try? All my ideas didn't get me anywhere - least of all sober. What do you have to lose by trying?
For me, the mental & spiritual recovery were more difficult than the physical. And there are so many things that really do help. If you are a praying person - pray, pray a lot. Write - write a lot. Do a gratitude list daily. Remind yourself that you ARE worth it. Chat with people here and ask questions. None of us can do this alone - not if we want to be happy about life.
I could go on & on, but you are in my thoughts and prayers. Focus on today and if you go to bed tonight without a drink...do it again tomorrow. I'm pulling for you.
For me, the mental & spiritual recovery were more difficult than the physical. And there are so many things that really do help. If you are a praying person - pray, pray a lot. Write - write a lot. Do a gratitude list daily. Remind yourself that you ARE worth it. Chat with people here and ask questions. None of us can do this alone - not if we want to be happy about life.
I could go on & on, but you are in my thoughts and prayers. Focus on today and if you go to bed tonight without a drink...do it again tomorrow. I'm pulling for you.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: NEW LENOX,IL
Posts: 61
Thank you all for posting, it REALLY means a lot! I,m going to toss the beer now,
( this is painful!) and start without temptation. My wife drinks wine, and I'm o.k. with that now, not a big fan. If it becomes a problem I will surly let her know.
( this is painful!) and start without temptation. My wife drinks wine, and I'm o.k. with that now, not a big fan. If it becomes a problem I will surly let her know.
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