Horselover

So glad it worked out for you Chiy and glad you're feeling a bit better. Let's have a better day tomorrow okay? I mean both of us. We can do it. I'm thinking positively.

:ghug3

Edit: Read above after. Things like this can't always be turned into lighthearted moments. Sometimes we have to feel and go through our emotions. I learned that today if nothing else.

Rella927

Chiy

Horselover

By the way Chiy, I am sure Steam didn't mean any harm. He is very kind hearted. We are all trying to help in our own way. Will be thinking of you as the day progresses darlin and as I said, its got to get better!

Aysha

I know SV..And I didnt take it that way.. I am always usually the one saying the same exact thing.
But I was really hurt by this the past 3 days. It just reminds me so much of when I was little and a teen.
My grandparents were always drinking and my grmaps was the meanest most hateful person..The things he use to do mentally and verbally were unbelievable. Calling the cops on em for no reason..cutting tv and phone cords so I couldnt watch tv or use the phone...Cause a scene because he passed out on the couch and I made a little too much noise at 7pm gettign a drink...He made my childhood a living hell. He use lock me out of the house...Come in my room when friends were over and and yell at them and tell then to get the F out of his house for no reason. He would trash our christmas tree soem christmases. Not until we found out he was dieing did he and I stop hating each other.
My grams drank right along with him.
I hate alcohol..More than my own DOC. I dont know my own father because he was too busy getting drunk and locked up or running from the law when I was growing up.
I just have a real low tolerance for alcohol and usually anyone who drinks.
When I first came here...I wouldnt even read the alcohol related threads. I didnt want anythign to do with them.
But I have met alot of wonderful people here whose DOC is alcohol. And that has helped change my view of alcoholics.
I know I am a crack addict...But that was my own doiing unto myself.
I have found a better understanding for those suffering from alcohol.
But it still hurts me so much to see soemone who is my world drinkign like she is.
So I didnt take offense at all.
I just cant find anything funny..or even close to it rght now.
Not about thgis..Not with her.
It just pisses me off and hurts right now.
I am sorry you felt I took it the wrong way.
I know you are trying to help.

Captain Kirk

i hope you are able to have a Sober Merry Christmas and a Sober New Year.

Dee74

I'm sorry Trish - hugs.

I agree with amy - this is life stuff - we're just not used to dealing with it...

and yr grams is probably not thinking of how it impacts on anyone else any more than we did, you know?

take care, stay close to SR and breathe.

I'd fed ex you a cheeseburger if I could

D

four812

hi chinyta

great job not drinking.

nice to be a renter and not have to deal with paying for all that damage

you are a wonderful part of my recovery and i want you to know that your thoughts and stuff you shared with me about smoking crack has been so helpful. you were/are part of the gift of my sobriety....i'm around 70 days or so today, and i'm glad to be facing the stresses and whatever of the holiday season without drugs/drink

keep up the good work beautiful

Sugah

Is your gram a binge drinker, Trish? Or does she drink pretty consistently? I'm thinking if I were in your shoes, I'd be looking for another relative, friend, or even a shelter to get me out of that situation. I can tell you feel responsible for her, but so long as someone is willing to be responsible for her, she really doesn't have to change, does she?

It's harsh, but we can't help anyone else until we are able to take care of ourselves, and it sounds like the last couple of days have been pretty rough on you.

Peace & Love,
Sugah

Aysha

She binges maybe 2 or 3 times a year. And has maybe 1 or 2 beers or wines every few months.
She hardly ever drinks.
But she just goes on these binges like 2 or 3 times a year.
Today was good. She tried having a beer I guess and didnt even want it. I watched her dump it.
I was sick all day. I thought I was dieing. My stomach hurt so bad and I slept all day. So I missed Christmas.
I got really stressed out this morning when my boss called me and told me I didnt have to come in to work. I asked to work today becasue I need the hours and the holiday pay.
After that is when my stomach started feeling sick. I couldnt even touch it it hurt so bad.
My family thought I had an ulcer or somehting.
I think it is just some serious gas that wont go anywhere. I have never had a gas bubble like that before.
It still hurts..But I am not doubled over in pain wanting to cry liek I was all day.
I cant leave my grams...Its always been me and her.
I have screwed up way more times than she has. And I am quite ashamed of myself for not being more understanding. She has never turned her back on me ever in my addiction.
And because of that. Is why I still try and why I am still here.
I should have been more caring and compassionate with her.
Instead of flipping out and treating her like I did.
So it goes both ways this time.

Impurrfect

(((Trish)))

I'm sorry you didn't get to work, and hope you get to feeling better. Glad grams didn't drink today.

Take care of you, and let's shoot for a good day, tomorrow, okay?

Hugs and prayers!

Amy