ARABELLA

I'm drinking and i cant stop.was 90 days sober and it was hell.now i've been drinking every day for a week and i cannot stop because when i do all the problems hit me...family...husband problems...and believe me there is nothing i can do about this right now,nada.
I have a young son ..9..and a puppy dog who need me.
Last night my husband gave me a black eye cos of my drinking;first time he laid a hand on me and i'm in shock. We've been together 10 yrs. And my son saw it too.
I was/am in aa but it's not enough....right now i'm in despair and shock that he could hit me, and that aa is not working and i just can notstop drinking.
Can anyone help.
X

ericamay

Hi there my friend!! I am so sorry you are hurting and in despair. I understand, as I am too right now. I do not drink everyday, I binge drink. Last nite I drank again after 7 days sober. Turned out very badly. You reãlly need to reach out to a family member or friend who can help you, and pull you out of this. Maybe even go to rehab. It will be worth it. I am here for you friend!! And so is God !! He will help you if you ask.

Latte

There is never a reason for anyone to hit you.

AA may not be enough, it wasn't for me. I ended up in an intensive outpatient rehab and was finally able to get clean and sober.

I'm sure others will come along to talk about their ES&H.

Rusty Zipper

we can find are drinking can push our loved ones to say, or do despicable things...

is A.A. not working, or one not working A.A.

or any recovery program...

detox, and a good long term in house might be a way?

with plans on continuing recovery before one gets out...

there is a solution, its just up to us to find it...

good wishes to you arabella...

rz

Sugah

Is drinking somehow moving you closer to a resolution of your problems? I'm don't mean to sound sarcastic. I'm trying to understand. I do understand drinking to avoid dealing with problems, but in my experience, drinking only made them worse, never better.

I'm sorry your situation came to blows with your husband (violence is never okay, but as a violent, belligerent drunk, I can understand driving someone to lash out). If this is the first time in 10 years that he's struck you, then whatever the problems between you, it sounds like they're getting worse.

Attending AA meetings doesn't bring a miraculous recovery from alcoholism. It takes a lot of work. Three months isn't long enough for most to really do that work. Why not give it another try? There were times in my first year of sobriety when I thought it wasn't working, but I made a promise to myself to take all the steps with my sponsor and do my best to trust my conception of god before I decided that it didn't work. I'm glad I was stubborn. By the time I reached the 12th step, I not only didn't have to drink, I didn't want to drink.

Problems don't go away because we put down the bottle, but until we put down the bottle, we can't really do much to resolve them. You can change something about your situation. You can change you.

Prayers...

Peace & Love,
Sugah

least

I hope that you can find a new sober life and that you and your husband can work on solving your family problems. Alcohol will only make things worse.

Bangoob

Hi, dear!

I can relate to you almost perfectly, except for the fact that I've never been physically abused (although sometimes I must have deserved it as some form of punishment for the razorblade hurtful things I used to say when drunk), and for being a man: I have been married for 10 years too, I have a daughter of nine and a Westie terrier pet, and when I drink I can't stop. Now I have again: it's Day 3, always my worst (dunno why - prolly some subtle chemistry of the body), and on Friday I'm goin' to see a counsellor for the first time in almost 20 years of active alcoholism (at the tender age of only 34), since in my country AA are very poorly organized. Do like me: making future plans is an exit outta despair. When I was a child, there was a TV children's show, a Czech movie, called "Arabella" - she was a beautiful princess constantly fighting off the evil schemes of Wizard Rumburak, whose main goal was to steal her magic ring - a diamond ring, which, when turned around on the finger of its wearer fulfilled his/her every wish... Well, I think you can figure out the moral of this pretty childish allegory, but mostly think of the rather extraordinary name coincidence. It doesn't happen every day to be namesakes with a princess, but some day, why not today?, Rumburak=alcohol can be given a small, but decisive, first kick in his hairy butt. It's well worth givin' it a try: if it gets is exceedingly hard, physically speaking, get medical help, as severe withdrawal symptoms are usually what lands you on the bottle again. So, Arabella, what are u waiting for: turn the diamond ring on your finger!

Love,

Goob, a Day 3er, arrghh...

bumble2008123

bangoob i like your response. You can do this, Arabella. I am so sorry for what you are going through.

nickishine

Arabella,

So sorry, hon, for what you're going through! I can empathize with drinking because of the problems that I should be facing, and just can't.... Then drink more and the black hole gets bigger and bigger, probs still are there and have to drink more and more to get numb. The scariest thing is quitting because everything surfaces and becomes real, cuz it is real! You know that this isn't easy, my dear, and if it were we wouldn't be on our computers right now relating to one another. Please give yourself a chance a sobriety again and putting down the bottle because you know in your heart that's what you need to do, right?!!!j You may have had no pink cloud in your previous 90 days and the magic wand of sobriety didn't bring you all the fluff and flowers that some people talk of. The reality is getting sober is the scariest yet most courageous thing we can do for ourselves... and you don't have to go it alone. It is painful and we need to LEARN how to cope in our pain rather than drinking and ruining our lives and loved ones lives in the process.

I'm crushed that your husband hit you! There's no good excuse for that and don't have a lot in which I could comment on with not knowing the situation clearer. However, alcohol is a destroyer and will ravage it's assailant body, soul and mind. Please please please put it on the shelf and keep seeking help! God is there for you in the midst of your despair! Ask, knock & seek..... You will find!! Don't give up! Keep posting, reaching and reading!!!

My prayers are with you! Hugs xoxox
Nicki:praying