brazilian

I learned that hemp doesn't help. Quitting does

happycampers

Right on, Brazilian - I FULLY agree ! I have had cravings today, but just sitting with them . They're just old, repetitive thoughts that I know will visit me as they have 1,000's of times in the past, but I DON'T need to act on them. They're OK to float around in my head for awhile, til they pass. Now it's time to go do something like eat - I haven't eaten yet today.

CatWings

I notice my cravings are coming up when I feel overwhelmed or start second guessing other things in my life going on right now. I notice I get cravings when I start feeling bad about myself - even that I am not more functional right now due to withdrawal issues. So trying to keep the negative self-talk in check is a real help right now and making sure I am supportive of myself.

happycampers

wise- abusing yourself with criticism will only drive you to your DOC - much better to treat yourself with the tender loving care you deserve . Let the Light In !

brazilian

Friday night ahead.. keep steady everyone!!

happycampers

just took myself out for supper and now time to watch the "American Hustle" - that's my Friday night ! Have a great evening, everyone !

bigsombrero

I'm not so sure we do this for the "false reality". People who smoke every day for 20 years aren't just smoking because they like the way the sunset looks when they are stoned. I think it's a coping mechanism. The addiction comes on later, and then you've got more problems to cope with, which naturally leads you to more dope.

FreeOwl if you are smoking now again, maybe it's not for enhancement, but rather to escape your responsibilities. The funny thing is, your responsibilities probably aren't even that severe...you are just experiencing a little anxiety, and your first reaction is to drink. Not having drink on the menu these days, you'll move to weed. I started smoking weed after a very scary bout with alcoholism for those same reasons. I'm glad I quit doing that.

FreeOwl

hey bigsombrero...

Yeah, I didn't really mean the shifted reality in the sense of "wow look at how vivid those colors are"...

I really meant more in the whole, fundamental "I don't like my current reality so I'm going to shift it to something that some part of me percieves as 'better'" sense.

Addict or non-addict, I'm finding it increasingly puzzling that so many humans turn to substances of various kinds on a regular basis. Seeking something. Whether or not one has a 'problem' with the substance, it's still a shifting of reality on some level.

I allowed myself to join my friend in smoking.... that was the door-opener. And I suppose I did that because while I've accepted and acknowledged a choice of sobriety where alcohol is concerned - I had (have?) not yet come to that acceptance with marijuana, leaving room for 'a little bit here and there'.

That said - I had not ever wanted or craved or really even thought much about it since back in November.... until that simple sunny afternoon when it was offered and I accepted it.... and then felt kinda lousy about it.

And by opening that door even a little bit, it made room for my decision to have a bit more, on 4 occasions now. Looking at that pattern - while it is far less severe and impairing than the impact Alchohol has for me - it is the same behavior. It is the same "seeking" of that altered state. I don't like that. And I think it moves me further in the direction of opening myself to vulnerabilities with drinking again too.

Life is pretty magnificent all on its own. That's the bottom line.

CatWings

I love that movie. I hope you enjoyed it. Your Friday nights sound a lot like mine these days. Last night I want to an NA meeting and that was good to get out. I isolate too much.

Dee74

I have to be honest - I don't find it puzzling at all - I see the attraction it had for me very clearly.

Getting wasted is an easy fix - it works on the symptoms without disturbing the real problems too much.

Being me was not fun for me. A vacation from being me was very appealing. Unfortunately I took so many vacations I lost sight of the real me for decades.

I'm glad I found myself again, and glad I found the courage to work on my real problems.

This is the peace serenity and happiness I was looking for in a bong or a bottle all those years

D

FreeOwl

Well I mean for the many "normal" people. People whose lives don't need an 'easy fix'. For people who don't have addiction issues or anxieties or whatever else underpins the patterns of those of us who face problems with substances.

Why, then, do even the 'normals' seem to turn to it? It's everywhere!!

I donno. Just rambling and not expressing the curiosity well.

I definitely see how for me it became "easy fix" territory and then habit and then a part of who I even was. It just strikes me that everywhere I turn people use substances as a matter of course in their lives.

Yet so much of the goodness of life is to be had without that alteration...