four812

day 14
I got some days stacked up now. And now feel the sense of "coasting", resting on my laurels. Part of me does NOT WANT to meditate and pray and excercise and write.

so if i don't do those things then what will I do instead?

It's 6AM and I'm home as I took the day off work and have plans for a meeting, Yoga, and an annual physical. so here I am kind've in a good place. but I'm tired. my mind is telling me that i am tired. and my mind says that i HAVE to rest. who or what is behind this "mind" that i am noticing now.

no matter...i simply just cant get going

but I have one goal...to stay clean
it's early and right now my resolve seems low
i need to be careful...i need help

stone

I am on day 14 too K and strangely enough feel like you do!

I have felt tired for weeks and am seeing the Doctor about it today but I have still gone to a meeting nearly every day...today is the first day I have a meeting planned but feel like skipping it though.

I like how you said 'what will I do instead?' I would sit around bored probably.

Me, I am forcing myself to go to the meeting and the Doctors...even though I really don't want to.

Rusty Zipper

k5 maybe not drink or drg, just might be miserable...

action k5!

get off that butt

the foundation one puts into early recovery, paves the way to our future in recovery...

good wishes

rz

kinpaul90

I am day 11 and feel exhausted too, I got up at 6.30 am this morning as I went to bed at 11 the night before, I had some breakfast and started watching a movie and was so tired I had to go for a nap by 9 am.
I am up now but still really tired, I think I might go for a walk in the fresh air to try and wake up.

Pelican

Good morning sleepy ones!

I remember 2 weeks of sobriety. I felt extreme fatigue. There wasn't enough coffee in the pot to get my day started. But I limited myself to my usual intake!

I agree with Rusty, get your big kid pants on and get moving. Your body is transitioning from abuse and nutritional neglect. It will take some time to feel more energetic. Exercise does help. Go for a walk, good idea kin! Get your blood flowing. I kept pushing myself those first few weeks to stay active. I slept wonderfully at night as a result. I'm on day 63.

You can do this. Keep us posted.

Anna

Hi Ksplash,

I agree with you totally that you have to do things to take care of yourself. I do understand you feeling tired. It takes consistent care to stay sober, but, I suspect that it's your disease speaking to you and it's speaking out of fear. It sees that you're getting the upper hand, and it doesn't want to give up. Stay focused. It sounds like you're doing great!

Ananda

Ekkkks.....I still have this problem at times...alot of times.

Yesterday I tried changing my morning routine up....am doing that again today, though in a less dramatic way.

I do have to keep on doing whats in front of me, but simple things like bright lights and fresh air help alot, as does going to bed on time.

I had not wanted a meeting Friday and Saturday...in fact spent a good portion of the day dwelling on how i didn't want to go...found an excuse not to friday, and when i draggggged myself there Saturday...it ended up i felt better afterwords...all that head stuff for nothng.

I've heard that making a decision can save you from a hundred small ones throughout the day...This morning if I can make the decision to do the few simple things I need to do...bills, party, work......then the rest of the decisions will be easy...just need to fall in line with the end goal.

stone

That is the worry isn't it? There might be times when you know you are just physically tired and the best thing you can do is rest but other times there will be a niggle, something at the back of your mind that is telling you to be careful, and that it is the 'disease speaking to you'.

Other times it is hard to know which is true and then I might compromise and drop some things on my to-do list but still force myself to do some of them eg. today I am forcing myself to the Docs and to a meeting as I feel that is all I can manage.

least

Congrats on 14 days clean!

:ghug3

SlvrMag

I've always been told the meeting I DO NOT feel like going to, is probably the one I SHOULD go to!!

Congrats on 14 days!

Eclipse

Great job on two weeks! There is alot of change going on in your body/brain right now...be kind to yourself!

littlefish

When I re-read my recovery diary, I experienced a lot of physical withdrawal symptoms the first two weeks: my stomach went on strike because it was not used to regular meals, my brain went into insomnia mode because the alcohol wasn't there to drug me to sleep. It was kind of rough going the first 3weeks.
By the end of the 3rd week though, I was sleeping well and regained my appetite. I did notice though that I was really sleepy and fatigued for almost 6 weeks and took a lot of naps.
You'll get better!

Aysha

Great job on 2 weeks. Yea..that evil voice will try everything to get you.
But I know you are stronger.
Just keep up what your doing.
No great words of wisdom here.
All I can do is fight like hell.

Ananda

hope things are perking up for you ksplash.

:ghug

mle-sober

ksplash,

I have a new quote that has been inspiring me lately. It's from an Austrian doctor who was held in the Nazi concentration camps. He was known for his work treating suicidal patients before the Nazis decided he was a threat. He said:

"Everything can be taken from a man or a woman but one thing: the last of human freedoms, to choose one's attitude in any given circumstances, to choose one's own way."

Although I don't have the exact quote, he said that true freedom exists in the moment after they (the Nazis, in his circumstances) do something to you and before you respond.

These days, when I am struggling with my thoughts, I remember that it is my choice how to respond to my thoughts. That's where my greatest strength is.

Congratulations on 2 weeks!

Pinkcuda

Technically, "Laurels" don't occur until the 9th step is complete.

stone

LOL

espresso

Easy Does It - But do it!!! especially early on in recovery. It's great that you are on Day 14. Just take things one day at a time or even one hour at a time, don't pick up that first drink and remember H A L T
Hungry
Angry
L nely
Tired
Keep posting here about your progress.

four812

I just came online here at 2 in the morning and have read through this thread. i really appreciate the responses. every one of them made me feel good.

oh and one special note. i had a nice laugh too when i read this one: I did good yesterday. I went to the 8am meeting after posting here. i came back home and rested as i wasn't feeling good. a migraine headache was developing. i figured it would go away with some peace and serenity. but it didn't

anyway I did go to yoga and my physical exam....and that was it for the day. i went home and went to bed....well i didn't sleep. couldn't sleep. i kept my fists buried in my eyes and my head buried in pillows and suffered. finally i gave up and went to the drug store and got a perscription filled that i had gotten at the doctors, for IMMItreX. it has been years since i've had a migraine.

i think i ate too much food and had too much coffee and cigarettes the day before.

i can tell i'm feeling better now, because i want to go out and get a pack of cigarettes.

right now, having "no pain" is enough for me to be grateful and content in my new found sobriety.

so i guess i am officially on my 15th day clean today.

take care everyone

stone

It seems like I am copying you K, but I have been getting migraines too!

I only managed to get to the Docs yesterday, no meeting. I spent the day in bed sleeping. I am getting blood tests done because this exhaustion is extreme.

Today I am going to counseling for my depression and a meeting though.

I am glad you are feeling better.