aasharon90

Hi Im Sharon an Im an Alcoholic.

By the Grace of my HP an people
like you here in SR, I havent found
it necessary to pick up a drink of
alcohol since 8-11-90.

For that and you I am truely grateful.

How awesome it is that many of
the younger generation are noticing
they have problems with alcohol
or drugs and are reaching out for
help these days.

Shoots, when i was 18, haven just
moved out on my own, i partied, worked
and lived it up doing all the crazy things
young people do, however, never really
understanding the consequences that
followed my actions.

I figured I drank just like my grandfather
and could hold my liquor quite well.

Hmmmmm....years passed and after a horrible
accident in Feb 90 in which i ran off the road
at 2am hitting a concrete culvert sitting on top
the ground, it landing me in the hospital for
10 days with many broken ribs, contusions,
and a punctured spleen which was removed
so i would bleed to death.

A few months passed with no alcohol and
I healed almost perfectly........Come Aug. 10th
I stepped out once again to local club, right
back to the place i was before, to begin drinking
moderately then only a few hours later i was
home late trying to take my life.....

The progression of my disease was so rapid
that it still blows me away just thinking about it.

Family intervention took place and the police
came to take me away like a harden criminal
to rehab...... Aug. 11th was my very first day in
without alcohol and i continue to call it my
Sobriety birthday.

It was a 28 day stay there where i recieved
the tools and knowledge of my disease. The 12 steps
of recovery are my guidelines to live by one
day at a time without alcohol.

Today I can honestly say I have experienced
the joy of recieving the gifts of recovery mentioned
in our Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous.

Some have come quickly and some very slowly.....
nevertheless i have recieved most of them.....

It wasnt until I became COMPLETELY HONEST...
the last of the 3.....openmindedness, willingness
and honesty that i experienced the NEW FREEDOM
that is mentioned in the book or what we so often
in meetings.

Today is no different for me like it was when i
first entered AA. Today is another sober day of many
one days at a time collected to get me where i am
today.

Happy Joyous and Free.

It's not as complicated as it seems to be...I
just take it one step at a time day by day sharing
ur own experiences, strengths and hopes with
another person in recovery like myself.

And that's the way it works if you work it.

Thanks for letting me share

aasharon90

Hi SR.....

Sharing my ESH (EXPERIENCE,
STRENGTH & HOPE) with you guys here
in SR as well outside has helped me
stay sober a few ODAAT. (ONE DAY
AT A TIME)

Sharing my story of what it was like
drinking, what happened to me, and
what it is like now allows me to get
out of my self-centeredness or what
ever is bothering me...whether it be
people, places or things......

I know this formular has help me like
so many before me stay sober and clean.

You'd be surprised when u share ur
story with others how much it will help
u....

Try sharing part of ur story and see what
happens......For one thing you will notice
that u r not alone. Many have the same
similar story or experience as u.

NewDayNow

Thank You for sharing

Ed

least

I relapsed so often I thought I'd never be able to stay sober. But now that I want to stay sober more than anything it's a lot easier. I don't think I really hit a physical or financial or legal 'bottom', but it was more like a mental bottom. I was so suicidal and so often and felt like I wouldn't survive. I was SICK AND TIRED of always being sick and tired.

Can't describe it really, just something told me 'this time' was different than all the other day ones. Just something I felt in my heart. Still having rough times and situations but don't drink over any of it cause it will only make my numb for a short while, but would feel ten times worse afterward. I know the end of my tape all too well, having gotten there so many times.

As much as it might be a pain right now, I still like my sober life a hell of a lot better than my drinking life. What's the saying? My worst day sober is better than my best day drunk.

ONe of the benefits of a clean and sober journey is my traveling companions!

:ghug

aasharon90

Thanks for sharing LEAST. Well said....as we talk the talk
and finally walk the walk day by day in recovery.

There have been many times over the years that I had
situations that disturbed the heck out of me and
still do yet nothing is too terrible TODAY to allow
my feathers to get so ruffled i need to drink over.

There's always healthier solutions to problems today
besides harming or hurting ourselves or making the
situation worse.

I know for myself I NEVER have to go through
anything alone again....I never have to figure
out anything by myself....

If i don't know how to do something or need
answers then i find someone to help me instead
of racking my brain. Today that is sooooo
comforting to know im not alone to figure
things out.

That makes life in recovery so much more
simplier.

Thanks for letting me share.

Rusty Zipper

my story, not much different from many others...

i drank, i druged, i liked it...

i ruined my life, i wreaked havoc on others lifes...

i forged through life like a Bulldozer...

in the end, there was nothing left...

i surrendered to my addictions, put the 12 steps in my life, and the promises...

the steps dont make life any better, they have shown me how to make my reaction to life better, and my life better...

for myself, and all those i come in contact with today...

good wishes

rz

aasharon90

Positive share Rusty....and so true like many
of us.....plowing threw life, seeing the path of
destruction we made all along the way.....not
knowing it then, but surely realizing it now.....

When under the enfluence we didnt care
or what we hurt because we were either to
numb to feel it or too angry to care.

I lied and munipulated my way thru many aspects
of my life and i could care less who got hurt....esp.
friends, family, people in authority......

Today with the knowledge learned about our
disease I dont have to go on beating myself
up over the past or feeling sorry.....or playing
the victim.

Today I have more respect for myself and for
life around me. Im more tolerant of others....
learning forgiveness along the way and remaining
humble thru it all.....

Sure it sounds like a tall order to fill.....but hey
i didnt get where i am over night.....i stumbled
all along the way taking note of those before me
in recover.....those so called "WINNERS" "OLD-TIMERS"

They stayed clean and sober a many ODAAT and thus
passed the knowledge of how to do so with me.....

Today its not the bulldozer like Rusty said, but for me
it riding on the back of a bike feeling the wind and
sun on my face.....the feeling of FREEDOM like an
Eagle soaring across the sky.

Happy Joyous and Free.

adore79

I dont think ive shared my story here before so I will give a brief rundown.

As a teen I drank and drugged but it was never a problem, exept that I liked alcohol so much I knew I would turn into a regular drinker as soon as I turned 21.

I started drinking quite a bit, usually by myself, after I turned 21 and by 23 I was drinking whenever I wasnt at work, everyday and on weekends. I passed up a lot of opportunities to meet people and to go to school, or get better jobs or saving money all because that was secondary to my drinking. The few relationships I had with guys never went well, and rarely lasted more than a month, they always eventually left because I would treat them badly and neglect them, again, they were secondary to my addiction.

At 27 I was hospitalized with an enlarged liver and pancrease from drinking and the doctor told me never to drink again. This scared me into quitting for about 6 months, although it might have been more like 9 months, I can't remember. It was not a good nine months though, I had an "episode" and spent a while in the phych ward where I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder type bipolar. Once I got out, I became very depressed and started drinking again. I was lucky enough to get my old job back but I soon quit it in order to be able to drink all day. My plan was to drink the money I had saved and then to hell with everything, maybe I would just jump off a bridge or something.

My attitude started turning around once I came back to SR, reading the stories here renewed my hope for a better life. Also, I finally was prescribed an antidepressant that actually worked. Today I have a lot of hope for the future, even though my life is still messed up. Thanks for letting me share.

aasharon90

Thanks for sharing ur story felly.....When u
mention phych ward, it flashed me back to the
first night i spent in rehab.....the bottom floor
was the phych ward for patients that had
mental problems.....i guess since i hit bottom
the night before and tried to end my life over a
dare, i guess i was in a dangerous mental state.

That night i was there i stayed in a room with
fence barracaded windows....outlets that were
cemented and hall ways filled with the sound
of feet shuffling across the floor.....

How sad and scarry it was as i thought to mysef,
im surely not bad off as these people......

Sure enough the next day i passed all the test
thrown at me and upon review it was suggested
that i had a alcohol problem......

And yes that was it as i spent the next 28
days in rehab.....

Im still an alcoholic today and shall always
be one till death do i part.....but today im a
happy alcoholic with lots to be grateful for.

Im especially grateful and thankful for given
another sober day just by following 12 steps to
the best of my ability and giving away what
was so freely passed on to me by so many
before me in recovery.

A really simple program when done on a daily
bases......really how can u go wrong.....

Thanks for letting me share.

Honu

What a great thread. I need to read this all again. Sharon, you have obviously gleaned a ton of wisdom from the "old-timers"!

Thanks for having this topic, and I am definitely going to read and re-read it, and hopefully, there will be more and more people adding to it.

Honu