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A sense of calm... I just had the most awesome feeling come over me that I wanted to share. I woke up this morning with a real sense of calm about me. I cannot remember the last time this has happended. I am happy and content feeling and loving it. Actually feeling at peace within myself. I want to hold on to this feeling and live with it the remainder of my life. If only that were possible... For this moment I will remember and try to recapture should things go down hill. :) |
You know, Suzette, I think that the feeling of calm is always there. But, the noise in my head will often attempt to drown it out. I have to go looking for it, but once you find it, you don't want to let go. |
(((Suzette))) I'm so glad you're having a feeling of calm. You have been through SO much, you certainly deserve it. Hold onto it for dear life:) Hugs and prayers! Amy |
Calm is a good place to be Suzette. I try to savor those moments for all they're worth. Sometimes they're short, other times they feel like they'll never end. I've heard it said that life in recovery is like a heart monitor. Flatline means we're dead, but those up and down lines mean life is happening. Life is a series of ups and downs, just like a rollercoaster. So today we can make the choice to ride it for all it's worth. :coaster |
Astro - I love riding rollercoasters!!! So why should my life be any different. I know I may seem negetive at times, but in my heart and soul I am a positive person, every since I left the alcohole behind. |
Thanks Suzette. What a sweet post from a sweet person to wake up to. :ghug3 |
Great post, Suzette! Hold on to this feeling! :) |
Originally Posted by Hope
(Post 1946645)
Great post, Suzette! Hold on to this feeling! :) |
Sunday, September 21, 2008 You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go Letting Go of Urgency One thing at a time. That's all we have to do. Not two things at once, but one thing done in peace. One task at a time. One feeling at a time. One day at a time. One problem at a time. One step at a time. One pleasure at a time. Relax. Let go of urgency. Begin calmly now. Take one thing at a time. See how everything works out? Today, I will peacefully approach one thing at a time. When in doubt, I will take first things first. From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation. |
I get that feeling too, more often now I'm sober than when I was drinking. I think my 'inner self' knows I'm in a better position and rewards me with that sense of 'calm'. :ghug3 Glad you are feeling calm, especially with all that's going on in your life right now.:ghug3 |
I'm glad you got a chance to experience a moment like that Suzette - you have certainly earned it! |
For what it's worth, I believe you're enjoying a "spiritual awakening" (or spiritual experience)...I've been fortunate to have felt what you are feeling a number of times over the years. We now understand that what Bill W. described in the AA Big Book is not the only way...it was just Bill's way. Lying there in conflict, I dropped into the blackest depression I had ever known. Momentarily my prideful depression was crushed. I cried out, "Now I am ready to do anything - anything to receive what my friend Ebby has." Though I certainly didn't expect anything, I did make this frantic appeal, "If there be a God, will He show Himself!" The result was instant, electric beyond description. The place seemed to light up, blinding white. I knew only ecstasy and seemed on a mountain. A great wind blew, enveloping and penetrating me. To me, it was not of air but of Spirit. Blazing, there came the tremendous thought, "You are a free man." Then the ecstasy subsided. Still on the bed, I now found myself in a new world of consciousness which was suffused by a Presence. One with the Universe, a great peace came over me. I thought, "So this is the God of the preachers, this is the great Reality." Quoted Source: Alcoholics Anonymous First Edition |
Jersey Nonny's post reminded me that at the meetings I attend we close with a reading of Ebby's Promise sometimes, it sends chills up my spine every time I hear it....... My friend promised when these things were done I would enter upon a new relationship with my Creator; that I would have the elements of a way of living which answered all my problems. Belief in the power of God, plus enough willingness, honesty and humility to establish and maintain the new order of things, were the essential requirements. Simple, but not easy; a price had to be paid. It meant destruction of self-centeredness. I must turn in all things to the Father of Light who presides over us all. These were revolutionary and drastic proposals, but the moment I fully accepted them, the effect was electric. There was a sense of victory, followed by such a peace and serenity as I had never know. There was utter confidence. I felt lifted up, as though the great clean wind of a mountain top blew through and through. God comes to most men gradually, but His impact on me was sudden and profound. Quoted Source: Alcoholics Anonymous First Edition |
Jersey Nonny's post reminded me that at the meetings I attend we close with a reading of Ebby's Promise sometimes, it sends chills up my spine every time I hear it....... |
For what it's worth, I believe you're enjoying a "spiritual awakening" (or spiritual experience)...I've been fortunate to have felt what you are feeling a number of times over the years. We now understand that what Bill W. described in the AA Big Book is not the only way...it was just Bill's way. I was hopitalized Feb. 1998 on suicide precautions and alcohol dependency, I stayed battleing the demon who wanted to end my life. The lord came to me in my lockdown room and awakened me in the wee morning hours and held me and comforted me. After 13 days I went home with my meds. and stayed sober for 7 calm years. I mean things were as hectic as they tend to be in my life - but I was calm. Church and teaching Sunday School every week... Life was good. I have not had that calm since Naomi left (Please read my Naomi thread). Only bits of calm here and there. I still pray daily although I haven't been back to church. I feel like a heathen saying this, but I am still angry with the lord. Today is a fairly calm day, and I'll take that. |
I feel like a heathen saying this, but I am still angry with the lord. If God seems far away...think...who has moved? I realized I had been distancing myself and needed to reconnect. Today is a fairly calm day, and I'll take that. "Be still, and know that I am God..." Even though I believe I can always feel the presence, it seems stronger when I just let it happen. Perhaps this "calmness" you're feeling... |
Thank you Jersey for those words of wisdom. I wish I could change my heart. I love the Lord, but regaining that trust is what's so hard for me. It seem as if it would take a miracle. He called upon me for years to adopt, only to have me fail. I tried as hard as I possibly could, why did it not work |
Hi toomuch. Thinking of you :hug:. |
Thanks for you post Toomuch. I felt that way yesterday for the first time in a very long time, actually I can't remember!!!! Here's to waking up that way tomorrow!!!:c014: |
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