its me again
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: dirty south, TX
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its me again
right now im doing some step-work that my sponsor assigned to me. im a little exhausted and getting myself worked up over something really small. but i guess it doesn't seem small to me, which must be why im typing about it on here. anyway, he told me to write about things i obsess over and things i havent let go of. of course i listed the usual (certain mentalities, ideas about people, stuff like that). i also wrote about something (or rather someone) that i still hold onto. after lookin it over, i decided that i had been "too honest" and tore the page out of my notebook, crumpled it up, and threw it away. then i decided that maybe it i should have left it in there because after all, it was something that i still havent let go of. then (like im so damn good at doing) i changed my mind again. i guess what i'm asking here is if there is such a thing as being "too honest". what i was talking about related to my sex life and i dont know if it belongs in the assignment. its honest, but does it belong in a paper like this or somewhere else?
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Texas
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If you are on your 4th step--it would be ok to leave it on there. My question--if you don't tell somebody this info (whatever it may be)..how likely are you to use again? Again, I don't know what exactly you are referring to--but you should be able to trust your sponsor...and that info shouldn't leave the room (what you two share/discuss). Just the fact that you even wrote it down to begin with says alot...it shows that you are starting to open up and trust others (even if only a little bit). Honesty is a good thing. I was dishonest for so long--in some ways I didn't even realize it--until my sponsor pointed it out to me. A good sponsor will also share some of their experiences too---so that you don't feel alone. Some things my sponsor told to me in complete confidence about herself made me feel more comfortable about sharing some of my stuff...overall it was about finding a new freedom/peace within myself..which came about by me being honest and willing to do the work. 
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Join Date: Sep 2008
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Originally Posted by ANGELINA243 
If you are on your 4th step--it would be ok to leave it on there. My question--if you don't tell somebody this info (whatever it may be)..how likely are you to use again? Again, I don't know what exactly you are referring to--but you should be able to trust your sponsor...and that info shouldn't leave the room (what you two share/discuss). Just the fact that you even wrote it down to begin with says alot...it shows that you are starting to open up and trust others (even if only a little bit). Honesty is a good thing. I was dishonest for so long--in some ways I didn't even realize it--until my sponsor pointed it out to me. A good sponsor will also share some of their experiences too---so that you don't feel alone. Some things my sponsor told to me in complete confidence about herself made me feel more comfortable about sharing some of my stuff...overall it was about finding a new freedom/peace within myself..which came about by me being honest and willing to do the work.
We Do Recover
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Texas
Posts: 2,619
In that case--I would be honest in a general way. You can go into further detail later on. That's just my take on it. You can make a list of what you obsess over and haven't yet let go of without going to "deep" into it. Use your best judgement--but don't let fear keep you from being open/honest with your sponsor. Plus, if this experience goes well, then later on doing a 4th step won't seem so hard. My point--see what this individual does with this info before revealing more about yourself to them. This is an anonymous program and things are supposed to be kept in confidence between sponsor/sponsee..but sometimes things happen and certain people don't always follow rules..we are all recovering alcoholics/addicts after all....and just because someone may have some clean time behind them...certainly doesn't exclude them from the "some are sicker than others" category. We are all human. More than likely he is just trying to see where you are coming from...sounds like it will be ok. Also, he may be seeing how willing you are to get clean..go to any lengths and follow directions.
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: dirty south, TX
Posts: 53
Originally Posted by ANGELINA243
In that case--I would be honest in a general way. You can go into further detail later on. That's just my take on it. You can make a list of what you obsess over and haven't yet let go of without going to "deep" into it. Use your best judgement--but don't let fear keep you from being open/honest with your sponsor. Plus, if this experience goes well, then later on doing a 4th step won't seem so hard. My point--see what this individual does with this info before revealing more about yourself to them. This is an anonymous program and things are supposed to be kept in confidence between sponsor/sponsee..but sometimes things happen and certain people don't always follow rules..we are all recovering alcoholics/addicts after all....and just because someone may have some clean time behind them...certainly doesn't exclude them from the "some are sicker than others" category. We are all human. More than likely he is just trying to see where you are coming from...sounds like it will be ok. Also, he may be seeing how willing you are to get clean..go to any lengths and follow directions.
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