mle-sober

Least,

I'm so glad you're sober still. That's the most important thing.

My almost 16 year old son also has a very busy life with school, extracurricular committments and social activities. He is very often disorganized with his life, forgetting to tell me he plans, wanting rides at the last minute, etc. I just honestly feel like it is part of what teens experience.

I talk to him about it and I try to help him plan and make sure he's thinking things through, but stuff still comes up. He goes to his dad's house on the weekends and he will forget to bring his cell phone. Or an important school book. Or his guitar and he has band practice. And this is after I've said, "Do you have everything you need?" before we leave the house.

I just try to help as much as I can and other times, when something happens, I try to chalk it up to what it's like to be a teenager and to how much he's trying to balance.

In other words, I think I'm saying, try not to take it personally. She's not asking you for a ride after a football game in order to tick you off.

If you are going to have her live with you, this stuff is going to happen more often, for sure. And if it's getting on your nerves now, imagine if it happens every day?

You know from my earlier post how I feel. Due to my own similiar experience, I can't help identifying with your daughter. I feel for her. And my sense is that you're overly critical of her and that you have a hard time seeing who she is and giving her the benefit of the doubt.

I know that's not what you want to read.

I am deeply supportive of your efforts and success with your sobriety. I think that in many ways, this isn't even about your daughter or what she is or isn't doing to anger you and whether she should or shouldn't come home. I mean, maybe it's really more about how you have been able to maintain your sobriety even with things in your life that are painful and discouraging and difficult. That's amazing to me and you deserve a tremendous amount of credit.

Hang in there. I'm glad you're still posting. And just because I'm feeling for your daughter's struggle right now doesn't mean I'm not feeling for yours too. I am. I hope you can keep trying to do the next best thing. That's all any of us can do.

L, mle

Hope

(((Least)))
I'm sorry you're going through this.

least

mle, I"m glad you are being honest with me. It doesn't hurt me to know how you feel, on the contrary, I appreciate your 'window' into her world.

I felt good enough today to go to church - hadn't been for a few weeks from being so sick. It was communion Sunday, and I asked God for the strength and wisdom to do what's best for the kid. We are going to start weekend visits and see how it goes. I'm also going to go to at least one of her counseling sessions, which she is willing to do.

At any rate, I'm not so beaten down by this today. I know that whatever happens, I am always her mom and I think she knows I love her, even if we are like oil and water.

Thanks to everyone for your caring thoughts. It helps me a great deal.

:ghug

mle-sober

Weekend visits and counseling sessions sound like the perfect baby steps. That's wonderful.

Thank you for being so tolerant of me speaking my mind.

I've gotten my feelings hurt here before I really don't want to do that to you. I'm glad you are feeling well enough for church. And that you are moving forward and not feeling so "beaten down." I am sure your daughter knows you love her.

I am thinking of you a lot these days. I hope you have a good and peaceful day today.

IO Storm

Kleenex time....

:ghug3:

Nuff said.

Horselover

Aw Least. That is good news and I am so glad things are looking a bit up for you.