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Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Saint Louis, MO
Posts: 1
New Here
Hi everyone. I don't know where to start, so here goes. I grew up with alcoholics in my family. I never was a drinker, didn't really like it. I met my current boyfriend 9 years ago and haven't left his side. This was when I took my first step into a bar. He has drank a 12 pack plus daily since I have known him. I only drank with him on weekends, and than it would get pretty violent, but no matter what, I stayed with him. I blamed his behavior on the alcohol.
I started drinking evernight with him I would say the last year or so. Anything from beer, wine to liquor. I told myself it was the only way I could handle dealing with him when he was drinking. In fact, as I was enabling him, I started to become a drunk myself.
I found myself having cravings for it.
We both have been sober since the 25th. We went to an AA meeting that night and I was proud of him! He went back again Tuesday and so far he plans on going back next week too. What concerns me is why he decided to quit cold turkey.
He is 37 years old. He has the beer belly of course, a fatty liver, yellow jaundice eyes and tingling in his feet. The doctor told him he never saw this in someone so young. They are sending him to a specialist for a liver biopsy so thats where we are at. I don't even know why I am writing all this, perhaps cause I can't really talk to anyone else about in fear that he will start drinking again and people will think I am nuts or dumb. He seems to have in his mind that he is dieing, so now what do I do???? I have protected him and helped (or so i thought i was) him, loved him for so long, but I don't think I can fix this one. Well thank you for the ear, this was a long one. :chatter
Gina
I started drinking evernight with him I would say the last year or so. Anything from beer, wine to liquor. I told myself it was the only way I could handle dealing with him when he was drinking. In fact, as I was enabling him, I started to become a drunk myself.
I found myself having cravings for it. We both have been sober since the 25th. We went to an AA meeting that night and I was proud of him! He went back again Tuesday and so far he plans on going back next week too. What concerns me is why he decided to quit cold turkey.
He is 37 years old. He has the beer belly of course, a fatty liver, yellow jaundice eyes and tingling in his feet. The doctor told him he never saw this in someone so young. They are sending him to a specialist for a liver biopsy so thats where we are at. I don't even know why I am writing all this, perhaps cause I can't really talk to anyone else about in fear that he will start drinking again and people will think I am nuts or dumb. He seems to have in his mind that he is dieing, so now what do I do???? I have protected him and helped (or so i thought i was) him, loved him for so long, but I don't think I can fix this one. Well thank you for the ear, this was a long one. :chatter
Gina
Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Eh? :)
Posts: 1,410
Well, rosebud, I think your bf has the right idea...if he doesn't stop he very well might die. It's a harsh reality, but this is a progressive and FATAL disease! It's great that you can see in yourself that there's been too much drinking...admitting it really is the hardest part. And fantastic that you're going to AA!!! Posting on this site is great, as you'll be able to talk to so many people that have been in, or still currently are in, the position that you are in right now. Great to meet ya. 
Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Northern CA
Posts: 1,733
Hi and Welcome. I agree with Heavy. It does sound like you're both on the right track. Going to AA and not drinking will help you both live a better life. They can also teach you not to live in constant fear. That's no way to live either. Take it one day at a time. One victory at a time. Don't look too far down the road. It's absolutely overwhelming. One foot in front of the other girl. Welcome. Welcome.
CindeRella is proof that a new pair of shoes can change your life!
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Spreading my wings
Posts: 7,163
Welcome Gina! 
you have come to a place filled with a lot of support!
Glad to hear that you are both are on the path of recovery...your BF sounds as if he
knows what is in store if he does not stop. And yes I agree that it is a "harsh reality, but this is a progressive diseease" with knowing that and making the first step to stop, IMHO you are both are your way to a better life!
Sending thoughts and prayers your way!
Please keep posting there is a wealth of information and support here. Please also check out the other forums and the stickies at the top of each.
you have come to a place filled with a lot of support! Glad to hear that you are both are on the path of recovery...your BF sounds as if he
knows what is in store if he does not stop. And yes I agree that it is a "harsh reality, but this is a progressive diseease" with knowing that and making the first step to stop, IMHO you are both are your way to a better life!
Sending thoughts and prayers your way!
Please keep posting there is a wealth of information and support here. Please also check out the other forums and the stickies at the top of each.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,759
Come here often to post and get useful info and advice. Please take good care of yourself in your new sober life. Take it one day at a time and you'll get where you want to be!
:ghug3
:ghug3
.....Welcome to our recovery community
Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Georgia
Posts: 471
Welcome Gina! I hope you keep coming back here. You're right, you can't fix him. So good that he went to a doctor and is going to AA. But what about you? I hope you don't put all your focus on him, he can and is getting help. It sounds like you need help, too. I don't mean to criticize at all, I just wanted to point that out as a way of being helpful to you.
Hugs and please let us hear from you!
Hugs and please let us hear from you!
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