lostbutterfly

[QUOTE=ananda;1924788]
you know when we start to see that sobriety is a possiblility and then we see someone suffering from this disease...it sorta goes beyone the personalities to just having been there and wanting to share what we have found with people suffering from this disease.
[QUOTE]

So true. When his mum was telling me on the phone last night, she was saying it was his fault, he had brought it on himself, all he ever had to do was give up drinking.

But I know the despair of wanting to stop and you just can't. It's not my place to help him anyway, as he is with someone else now.

RightAngled

Hey guys - I am 11 days through now - as of today this is the longest period of sobriety in over 5 years. Thing I am finding the hardest is the Friday/Saturday nights when I would be out getting bladdered - its filling that time I find hard. tempted to drink now but would only do it to kill time so I shall clean the kitchen or something - not rock and roll, but better than being drunk...

well done to everyone for remaining sober and retaining sobriety in what often seems to be some very difficult situations.

Take care

adore79

Day two and I know I wont drink today. Ive been feeling like such an incredible loser, a mooch, a bum, a nat. Perhaps I really should move out of my folks place and live in my car, at least there I would be free, and not a burden on anyone. It might motivate me to do better. Winter doesnt get too cold here, so I wouldnt freeze.

four812

angled you got me thiinking about the time.

i use to kill time mostly. time that I don't know what to do with. sometimes i'm bored so I use because i don't know what else to do. sojmetimes i regret wasting so much time in my life so I use.

then when i use i have lost time and i'm in the whole and i have to dig my way back out.

it's like that old story about walking down the road....i keep falling into the big hole and then digging myself out.'

well....at least i keep digging myself out. instead of just staying in the hole. but lately i've been sitting down there in that darn hole for way to many days in a row.

it's pretty sad...i make more money than i deserve...and i'm living week to week. literally living week to week. my credit cards are extended and i've nearly not had enough money for gas to get to work.

but tonight i have my daughter....maybe i can get one day again. today is day 1. i hope to keep it up.

go away addict mind....stop trying to get in and take over everytime i start over, and every time i start writing, and everytime i start to feel my heart again.

CarolD

New Day....
Congratulations!!

bostonluv

Felly I'm sure your parents don't mind helping you out right now. Living in your car is not the answer.

I'm a property manager and sometimes I evict people when they can't pay their rent and they have to move back in with their families. I don't know how many people I've told, it's not the end of the world. You will get back on your feet and be able to move out. Life hits hard sometimes. Do what you have to do. That's why God made family units. I have never moved back in with my folks but have been fortunate that I've always had my family to help me out in troubled times.

This thread is amazing. About a month ago it was full of people who couldn't make it past day 1 or 2. And now...look at all the sucess and even they people who have struggled and slipped keep trying. Ksplash - your posts always make me sad. Wish you'd consider rehab or NA or some type of recovery plan. Your addiction/drug is so strong. It reminds me of my meth addiction 10 years ago. I had a hell of a time. Certain drugs can be more difficult then others IMO.

adore79

Thanks Kathleen, but I really think they want me to leave, going so far as to say things like "we cant support you forever," "youre this close to living on the streets," and things like that. They are becoming more and more resentful to my being here.

Its strange because last year they practically begged me to move back in with them because I developed a mental illness. The illness has gotten better but I'm not back 100%. I can work, but the jobs I can work are limited.

I just dont know anymore. This isnt a good place for recovery, even if it is home. As much as I like my folks, they drive me crazy and I know that I drive them crazy and I need to find an out ASAP.

NewDayNow

Hi ksp

I know about falling in that hole.
Pullin for ya

Felly

You said it

Put those thoughts out of your mind. Give those thoughts a rest for a couple of days.

Some times ya just got to sleep on it. Works for me

Good Night all

Ed

TryingSoHard

Wrapping up day 10 here. I had a first tonight. I was really struggling and wanted a drink badly - more than I have in the past 9 days - and I told my husband about it. I wasn't sure how he'd react (thought I'd probably make him uncomfortable and he wouldn't know what to do or say), but he was very supportive and encouraging. It was nice.

lostbutterfly

TWO WEEKS!! It feels like a miracle!! I cannot put into words how grateful I am for finding all of you. Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!

CarolD

:ghug3
LostButterfly.....Congratulations!

TryingSoHard

Congrats, LB!!!! I hope to see you in the next thread in 4 days.

SelfSeeking

:ghug3

TSH!!!! You're doin it!

lostbutterfly

I'll keep popping back to make sure you're still on your way!!!

NewDayNow

Great to see everyone doing so well

I'm looking forward to my 16th sober day so much, I've decided to stay up and welcome it

CarolD

Thanks for everyone who shared so generously
on this thread....

Here is the link to the new fresh home

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post1926658

Please continue to keep in touch
Your participation is important to many members.