Doll

I just turned 22 and I'm pretty sure that I'm an alcoholic. I drink almost every night. Like one day a week I'll not drink and pretend that that means I don't have a problem, cause I can abstain for one night. I think I'm in denial about having problems because I manage to keep my life together. My friends and family have no idea. One of my best friends mentioned to me that she'd never seen me drunk before. I didn't have the guts to tell her that I'd been smashed 3/4 of the time we've hung out.

I'm too good at hiding it.

I'm afraid to go to AA because I am kinda shy. My job is one that means I have to be super social all the time to make tips, but the rest of the time I'm really reclusive.

I'm scared that if I go to AA all of the people will stare at me and I'm afraid that when I tell my story everyone will judge me.

Dee74

Welcome to SR Dolly

Read a while and you'll see you're not alone
There's a lot of support and help and guidance here.

Lot of information on all kinds of programmes too AA and...well - not AA LOL
D

Dee74

wow I double posted - first one in 7503 posts

ok - waste not want not - here's a link to some recovery programmes
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-programs.html

D

least

I'd be willing to bet that if you went to a variety of AA meetings in your area you'd like at least one of them. You may run into people in those rooms who do judge you or are less than kind. AA is made up of people, and all people are flawed. But they are really good, as a group, at getting sober.

It's a good thing you've decided to fix the problem now instead of waiting til your life was in shambles.

Keep coming back here. Read the forums. Gather experience and learn about getting sober. But do give AA a shot.

:ghug3

IO Storm

Nah! AA'ers won't stare atcha...I am an AA'er. And what I hear is...we are

so grateful for each new person who walks into the room. So grateful...

we were all there before you. Some years ago, some just days. But

you have found a good place here at SR!!!

And that is a fact.

Welcome.

IO Storm

Oh...and fearing judgement about your story?

Our text says "we share in a (general) way what we used to be like...."

The nitty gritty of it is to be told to your sponsor....not the whole gang!

*Lol*

Doll

My life IS in shambles. I've destroyed myself in many ways, including with school, friends, career, etc. The people who love me don't know it because I lie.

As far as AA goes, I'm afraid to walk into a meeting alone.

Also my job is one that most people would find unsavory, and I don't want to have to censor myself too much. Now I'm just making excuses like usual though. God I feel so helpless...

Doll

I just want to add that AA sounds really good to me. I want to go really bad. I even look up meetings in my area almost every day. My shyness and fear of quitting drinking stops me though.

Jules62

Hi Doll,

I don't care what you do for a living or how you may have lied to people.I won't judge you at all.Welcome.

I'm sorry you feel so helpless but you are not alone.I was at the end of my rope when I came here too.I'd hidden my drinking from everyone and most people in my life thought I was fine.But I wasn't.I was dying inside.

Please keep posting.I didn't want to do A.A either-I was terrified.I eventually went to a meeting and found only acceptance-not the judgement I'd kinda expected.You might find the same.Give it a try.I don't do A.A now-but I go to the occassional meeting.It's important to have a plan though-and to have sober friends-and SR does this for me as a whole.

I undertand your fear and your lonliness-but just know you're among friends here.We get it.You're not alone.

Julesxox

Dee74

My life was in a shambles ...I destroyed myself many ways including school, friends, career too. And no-one knew.

Like I said you're not alone.

We understand You can do worse than by just reading things here and keeping on posting - just as a start - to do *something*

as for your job - if you don't want to talk about it - don't. If you decide you do want to, this place is pretty good judgment wise.

We've all been to hell.

I didn't think coming here would work - but for me - it did. I not only found a place to talk about my problems and my life, I found a place to help others with their issues - and SR made all the difference for me.

Stick around - we really are quite nice LOL
D

Aysha

txsar

Hi Doll and welcome to SR! You will find a lot of encouragement, inspiration and support on this site.

I know what you mean about being afraid of going to an AA meeting. I have actually driven by a couple of meetings and not gone in. Right now I would like to go, but I cannot take the risk of being found out right now (have to testify in court in a few weeks). But as soon as I'm able to, hopefully mid-September, I plan to try again.

Maybe you could call the contact person for the meeting you want to attend and ask them about having someone meet you outside and talk to before you go in?? Just a thought. As I said, I have not attended yet, but would like to also.

Again welcome!

txsar

Anna

Hi Doll,

Welcome!

Please know that you are not alone in being scared of stopping drinking. It's a frightening thought to think of managing your life without alcohol. But, you can do it.

parentrecovers

nice to meet you, doll. i have a 24 year old daughter who is an alcoholic. so i can relate in many ways to your story. please ask for the help you need to get sober - go to the adults that you trust. and know that the folks at aa, when you decide you're ready to go, will not judge you.

there's other young people here at sr, so read around at the threads..

hugs, k

Toomutch

Welcome Doll
Glad you found SR

Rella927

Welcome to SR Doll! sorry that you are going through this right but as others have said you are not alone. Being aware that you want to stop drinking is HUGE! And there is a lot of support here at SR!

Please consider going to an AA meeting as others that go have been in your shoes and will not judge you that is not what the meeting is about! Just walk right in with a smile on your face-and sit down. Listen the first few meetings and get a feel for it and if it is not what you want to do there are other ways to stop-that link Dee gave is a very supportive link as there are many others in this site!

Keep posting and know we are here for you

IO Storm

Hey Doll..

It's me again..

You got some good tips! You can meet a friend for support outside the

meeting and they can pick you up.

And..it is true..you can "pass" on sharing in meetings. Just listen.

It is not scary....once you get there...

And stay here..

SR is the greatest!!!!!!!!!

Bamboozle

Hello, Doll! Welcome to SR. Keep posting and reading. I lurked around here for months before I registered. I don't know much about AA, but I sure do like it here.