bostonluv

Ireland,

I sent you a message.

ambush0212

J-I understand wanting to keep it private in certain aspects, but honesty is vital to sucess in recovery-I know this because in attempting recovery over the last 8 years I was never fully honest either with myself or with others and I always wound up picking up again. Ask youself this question "Do you want to live?" Some people out there can drink and they are fine, others of us can't--we're called alcoholics. Alcoholics who do not recover face an one of three thingss, institutions or death.Think about it.

JIreland

bostonluv - Thank you! Just replied

Carol - I will take a look right after I post this

51anna - I cant actually get a doctor because I dont have an address I can use. I am living with someone in my family but no-one can live with her because of benefits but I have no where else to go.
To get a doc here you need an address and I have nowhere at all I can use for that, unfortunately.

ambush Im not sure which is worse - Drinking or people knowing I drink. I am in a very closed type of community - The type where rumors spread and people talk about others and I don't want to be one of the things talked about, especially when all my family is here.
Id rather drink than know that to be honest, which is why I want to do this myself and keep it private.

I'm sure a lot of people here wouldn't agree with that and wouldn't advise it, but its just something I have to do.

Sorry to anyone that would advise differently and be open about it, but at 21 especially, its not something I want others to know about at all.

ForeverDecember

Hi J-I! Glad you're here at SR - I am 25 and feel like I'm "too young" to be an alcoholic. When I was about 21 or 22 (I think? Years blur a bit) I went into an AA meeting and was very scared. A lot of people had been in AA for years and years and I thought "I'm only in ym early twenties! This is crazy! I'll just stop on my own". Well that was a few years and a few billion drinks ago. I wish I'd not freaked out that time and done somethign about it then, but everything happens for a reason. Now is my right time to quit.

I was reading your last post thinking "hrmm... I wonder if he lives in my home town! No, wait, we don't have a doctor so it can't be here" I totally understand what you mean about not wanting people to know. I live in a town of about 300 people and rumours and stories always come with small communities. Which is another good reason for me to stay sober - when you act up drunk everyone knows about it. I started drinking at the caravan park so I didn't have to see any locals except the bar tenders. AA isn't an option for me either (there is no AA for a good 179kms away) and I use SR. SR helped me get to my longest alcohol-free period, 11 days sober, in 7 years.

Anyway, about the doctor thing - can you just make up an address? Will they check it? Pick a street and just add an extra number (so you don't use someone else's house address). Can you list a shelter or something? Or say you're homeless? I am assuming you're an American, and I've heard some horror stories about the American Medical system, but surely they wouldn't turn away someone who needs help? This last time (my 11 days time) my withdrawals were pretty tame. I'm drinking a lot less than I used to (thanks to my new partner and job I think), but I remember another time when I did a home detox and that was scary. I was drinking about 10 beers a night on average and on the night I "quit" I was having halucinations and all sorts. I could see a man coming into my bedroom. Very weird, and scary. I thouht it was just "normal" detox stuff so I didn't go to the hospital, but in hindsight I probably should have. I have been taking loads of vitamins at the moment, I don't know if it's helping, but it's not hurting. Vitamin B is meant to be good because the body uses up B when we drink.

Good luck, I look forward to reading more from you.

mizztake33

Welcome !

I did AA and therapy and Al-Anon- one thing I heard in all 3 that has really helped:

Keep coming back it works if you work it.

Be kind to yourself - you found the right place.

Live

There IS an anonymous AA 12 step forum with a subforum to help with the steps right here in SR.
There are also other methods/programs in secular recovery.

Hope you will take advantage of the support here, and know that by sharing your story you will be helping someone else!

Please do check with the Salvation Army, maybe in another town.....or a hospital in another town to detox safely. Please don't risk losing your life when you are just beginning it.

ForeverDecember

You could also use the hotline number to get confidential support. It's nice to talk to someone.

lrvp99

I'm using AVRT to stay sober. So far, so good. On day 22 now. I tried AA a couple of times, but it just wasn't for me. My main problem is it seems that removing alcohol from my diet has made very tired in the afternoons. I think it's nutritional. BTW, I'm 50 and I've been drinking for about 34 years, and have been drunk for the past 10 years (vodka every day). I just hope the damage I've don't to my body is not permanent. Best of luck.

sailorjohn

WELCOME!!!

Read your later posts, seems you may have gotten the admittance part down but if you're ever to have anything that approaches sobriety you're going to have to get a hold of the acceptance part, your excuses for not attending AA seem to indicate that you're a good distance away from that goal. Myself, I have the exact opposite problem as you. With the exception of my father, I don't have any friends/drinking buddies from my past that have made it through those doors. Would love to see one of them walk through, but I'm not holding my breath.