I'm so depressed I don't even go to family parties anymore
 

no urge, I just hate myself. God will get me through this. I've had an on going battle for 10 depressing years.

I find much peace in living sober
by using God and AA.

Welcome again....:)

Blessings

Depression is a disease that can be treated.

Your depression will tell you differetly though. It will tell you to suffer endlessly.

i can relate to your depression. it is very very difficult for you now. sounds like you are fearing to fall back into depression. I have a little bit of those feelings right now myself.

hang in there and i'll do the same

gotta get out and do somethiing....can't stay in the house.....right now i have to because my daughter is sleeping....but eventually she will get up and we will get out of here. in the interim I came here.

a lot of dependent people (alcoholics and addicts) confuse their extremely destructive 'self-centeredness' with 'depression'. I know I have. if I can't get the immediate gratification of what I want, I get 'depressed'. it's really nothing more than a pity party in the hopes that someone will feel sorry for me. then, I can take that person hostage and use them to make me 'feel better'. it's very sick, and also very common. it is one of the underlying conditions of almost every dependent person, which is why programs that actually work stress the importance of:
1. facing and admitting our deep, dark motives and inclinations
2. resisting the impulse to seek immediate gratification
3. surrendering to a set of ideals, or principles, that are NOT inherently selfish
4. continue on this course as a way of life

if you try doing these things for a full year and find you are still depressed, you might have a problem besides your dependency; in which case you might do what a healthy person would do: seek a professional diagnosis.

This is NOT medical advice, just my situation. I have suffered from General Anxiety/depression for 21 years. I am now 39. I have tried all of the benzos and SSRIs like Prozac and finally found my way to Lexapro. When I DON'T drink on Lexapro, the results that drug has are awesome. I haven't had a bout with depression for 4-5 years and my anxiety is very mangeable, especially now that I have stopped drinking. I suggest you ask your Dr about medical treatment. God Bless!

Mikey1980,
I felt like you do all my life. Then lab work revealed a low thyroid and some other assorted conditions. I was placed on thyroid medication and three antidepressants which did nothing (I washed them down with wine everyday) so I quit taking them. Then I quit drinking. Then, after a week or so of sobriety I started taking the thyroid med and one antidepressant again and they started working almost immediately. I felt so much better and those upsetting thoughts lessened significantly. It took about two weeks of taking the medications without alcohol but I felt the effects and knew I was on the right track.

Hang in there. If you can afford it, have some blood work done. You only have one life and one body to live it in so do your best to fix the damage you have caused and keep from inflicting more. Good luck. Keep posting.

Mikey..

I do not think you are looking for someone to feel sorry for you. Depression

is an illness, period. I know of which I speak.

Wish I Was said this..

"
Hang in there. If you can afford it, have some blood work done. You only have one life and one body to live it in so do your best to fix the damage you have caused and keep from inflicting more. Good luck. Keep posting."

I just had 4 vials drawn last week..two last month...have to keep my

chemical imbalance (including thyroid) balanced...feel free to search my

recent posts. I have more than two years of successful recovery...but it

hasn't been easy...

Never is with a dual diagnosis. Don't give up...


Blessings

Regarding SSRI Anti-depressants. Remember that they DO NOT work if you drink on them and they can actually make it worse. That's why I mentioned how well they worked without alcohol. Considering Alcohol is a depressant it makes sense.

So you're saying he should be depressed for a year, to wait to find out if he's actually depressed? :confused: Sounds like you're saying it's a good idea for his possible depression to untreated for a whole year in the off-chance he's just being 'self-centered' and having a 'pity party' as you put it. Not a good idea. :rolleyes:

Mikey, glad you came here to let us know how you're feeling. I've kinda been there too, it's not very nice I know.

Try to get down to a docs as soon as you can to explain how you're feeling. Depression is a very common, and very treatable illness these days - your doctor will know what is best. Plus, we're here on the forum if you need to talk about stuff or just vent. Wishing you all the best.

Is this what they mean by insanity is doing the same things over and over John?

Depression is nothing to do with self gratification or selfishness or whatever the hell else was mentioned here - it's not some brattish response - it's a recognised illness, Mikey.

When I'm sick I see a doctor, when I'm depressed I see a therapist.
Noone needs to suffer :)

As someone who has suffered chronic clinical depression, this advice would have harmed me. Don't wait a year.

D

Depression and sobriety
 

I'm now about 2 1/2 months sober. Right after quitting, I was very depressed, but seemed to be coming out of it. However, in the last few days, I have gone back down, and deeper, to where I'm suddenly having some thoughts that scare me. I'm seeing a therapist, but have been resisting medication, as I'm worried it's just something else to get addicted to! I'd appreciate anyone sharing experiences with depression after quitting and how long it lasted. Part of me can look at it and see how the illness prevents me from taking the steps I need to, but even leaving the house at this point has become almost overwhelming.

I think one of the dangers of getting sober is we sometimes fear legitimately prescribed medication....with little justification usually outside of the fact they're a drug.

I don't know you or your case history but I think it's always advisable to see your doctor - explain your fears and listen to what he suggests.

Again, I'm not diagnosing you LOL but I really think sometimes it's ok to admit we can't make ourselves better - we're ill, and we need a doctor.

For myself, if you've been totally honest with your doctor about your situation and your past addictive history and you're advised to take meds, I'd do so :dunno:

If they disturb you in any way, go back to your doctor and talk it through - or seek a new one.

D