jdcsawd

Having a tough time this evening thinking about my wife leaving me instead of working on my recovery. I've been to 5 meetings in just as many days and have been actually working it this time. Finally thought I was ready to move on to step 4. Now I know I need to go back to step 3 and determine the whole will, life and God thing. I just can't stop the thoughts going through my head on how I've caused her and her kids (we both have kids from previous marriages, her-3, me-2 all in the same house) so much turmoil with my drinking and thinking problems associated with being an alcoholic. I've said after each relaspe that I'll start working harder, now she's gone and unsure if she's coming back. I was fine until just after supper this evenign with my daughters now I'm just full of the self pity and remorse which I know I need to get rid of to be successful this time. I am actually enjoying and getting a lot out of working it this time and reading the big book. Maybe I'll just shower and go to bed and see if I can just try and sleep it off. I am keeping myself busy actually completing (action) things around here that I have put off for so long. Any simular stories to share or relate to will be greatly appreciated,

bostonluv

I know it's easier for me to be recovering from this alone. I mean without the person I love hanging around worried about me. It's helped me focus. Maybe it's a blessing. But I am sorry you're feeling badly. 5 days is great.

ghal

Just get sober for you and your kids and if it was meant to be the two of you will reunite. Until you are really sober trying to get her back probably will be hard and maybe a mistake. Obviously, I don't know the details but you explained it well enough. Gods Speed be with you!

tommyk

I went back to step 3 TWICE while I was attempting step 4.

Once I finally affirmed my commitment to step 3 everything began to smooth out.