What Do You Do Differently?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 102
What Do You Do Differently?
I've seen a few folks who are coming back from a relapse. So what are you doing differently this time to help promote success? What about your last attempt failed you? I ask b/c I'd like to learn. I never admitted it out loud before and sought help (hence why I'm here and doing things differently then my last attempt).
Looking For Myself...Sober
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Where the heart is
Posts: 10,209
For me..most of it is effort.
I really never put effort into recovery.
I am going to IOP. HAve to start meetings this weekend.
And just stay commited and watch for the red flags.
For me it is all about being serious about it.
I found myself in a very very scary place a few weeks ago.
I dont think I have ever scared myself before.
I was scared.
To death.
And so tired of it.
I am letting my thinking go. Which is why I always fail.
And listening to others.
I cant do it alone.
I really never put effort into recovery.
I am going to IOP. HAve to start meetings this weekend.
And just stay commited and watch for the red flags.
For me it is all about being serious about it.
I found myself in a very very scary place a few weeks ago.
I dont think I have ever scared myself before.
I was scared.
To death.
And so tired of it.
I am letting my thinking go. Which is why I always fail.
And listening to others.
I cant do it alone.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,504
When I finally stopped relapsing every few days or every few weeks, I think the difference was my mindset. Drinking was no longer an option. So...I had to begin to search for other ways to deal with life. I had turned to drinking to deal with every emotion for several years and I had actually forgotten that there were other ways to handle stuff in life.
Awaiting Email Confirmation
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 2,942
I realize that I'm always going to get dumb ideas and 'voices' in my head suggesting it is okay to drink/use, suggesting that I am a bad person, or basically suggesting something negative that really truly does NOT reflect the way I feel or the way I am.
I just recognize these ideas and voices as 'my disease' now, sometimes I laugh at them, but I know they have no bearing on what I think or what I do.
(I hope that makes sense.
)
I just recognize these ideas and voices as 'my disease' now, sometimes I laugh at them, but I know they have no bearing on what I think or what I do.
(I hope that makes sense.
)
Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Riverton, Utah
Posts: 48
I know this may sound silly..I have been sober for 133 days after trying to get sober for years. I gave myself permission to drink again IF I complete the list first. To date this list of activities, phone calls, service work, and meetings is at 75. WAY to many things to do to make it worth it..letting go of the need to control my drinking and letting my HP guide me has been the difference for me this time around.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Co Springs, CO
Posts: 116
Originally Posted by 51anna 
When I finally stopped relapsing every few days or every few weeks, I think the difference was my mindset.
Sober since 9th May 2008
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 2,973
Last time I tried to stop drinking I'd never heard of SR.
Was just trying to stop on my own, coming on here almost every night keeps the focus going whereas speaking to normal non drinkers, well don't think anyone who hasn't had a drink problem realises that is hard to just stop.
Thank you for letting me share SR, fraid all you guys are stuck with me for a while yet.
Was just trying to stop on my own, coming on here almost every night keeps the focus going whereas speaking to normal non drinkers, well don't think anyone who hasn't had a drink problem realises that is hard to just stop.
Thank you for letting me share SR, fraid all you guys are stuck with me for a while yet.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: CA
Posts: 357
Originally Posted by austingemini
I've seen a few folks who are coming back from a relapse. So what are you doing differently this time to help promote success? What about your last attempt failed you? I ask b/c I'd like to learn. I never admitted it out loud before and sought help (hence why I'm here and doing things differently then my last attempt).
Also, I have this amazing feeling of peace and safety once I stop drinking, and that is something I am reaching back to remember. Like Tommy said, there are voices to contend with, but it is easier to laugh at them when sober. Better yet, I like to recruit them to my "troups" to manage me away from insane behavior.
The first time I got sober, I had a not-so-nice roommate who took to stocking my favorite beer in the fridge AFTER she found out I was going to AA. Every time I looked inside and saw my drink of choice sitting on the shelf I had to chant "you're just a head of lettuce!". Never craved that one and couldn't think of anything more benign or unappealing than iceberg lettuce at the time. Anyway, I think it is a combination of determination and mindset with sense of humor (even if it as dark and goofy as mine is!).
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 347
lol sct - had me worried at the first line Hope I don't see you tomorrow.
OK-now I've really "outed" myself. Promise you guys won't call the funny farm and tell them I am talking to my refridgerator!
Sober since 9th May 2008
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 2,973
MMMMM !!!!!!!!
In the 60 days and under thread SoosieQ said and I quote :
"My nutty isn't as fun as most of yours!"
Less than an hour later I catch her talking to her fridge !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Can't call the funny farm huns, we're both already in it.
In the 60 days and under thread SoosieQ said and I quote :
"My nutty isn't as fun as most of yours!"
Less than an hour later I catch her talking to her fridge !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Can't call the funny farm huns, we're both already in it.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 26,425
well....i had to look at what worked before....when i was sober before i was active in aa and the 12 steps and i practiced my religioius/spiritual beliefs. I need both...so it isn't what i did wrong that i focus on but wht i did right...sticking with it so far
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Location: NY
Posts: 6,608
When I tried the last time I was in my early 20s. I tried with the help of AA, but I wasn't in the right place within my heart and found every excuse in the book on why I was not an alcoholic. I even had a sponsor, who God bless her, remained very patient with me. I eventually bailed on my sponsor, AA and sobriety.
I am now 41 years old and a "little" wiser. I know what the in between years (20s to now) have been and what has made them what they were. I am ready to say to heck with alcohol because I feel like I have drank enough for you, me and the next 100 people and my body is not going to heal if I continue that path. I still don't have a lot in common with the stories I heard in AA when I was in my 20s, but I do have the most important thing in common with them - "I am definitely an alcoholic."
I am now 41 years old and a "little" wiser. I know what the in between years (20s to now) have been and what has made them what they were. I am ready to say to heck with alcohol because I feel like I have drank enough for you, me and the next 100 people and my body is not going to heal if I continue that path. I still don't have a lot in common with the stories I heard in AA when I was in my 20s, but I do have the most important thing in common with them - "I am definitely an alcoholic."
where the light is
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 2,763
I finally fully, completely, 100% accepted that I am an alcoholic. Only took 25 years .
I am really trying to do everything I can to truly live a sober, happy life.
What I still do from previous attempts:
- journalling
- exercise
- better nutrition
- recovery related reading
What I have started doing since December 17:
- AA - meetings, sponsor, steps, going out for coffee
- SR - reading, posting, asking for help, helping others
- prayer, a bit of meditation
- spiritual reading
- reaching out to family & friends for support
- drinking "friends" are no longer a part of my life (happened naturally)
- sober and non-problem drinker friends are a bigger part of my life
It may seem like I spend a lot of time on my recovery but I really enjoy it (most of the time). This is the longest that I have been sober since I was 15.
.I am really trying to do everything I can to truly live a sober, happy life.
What I still do from previous attempts:
- journalling
- exercise
- better nutrition
- recovery related reading
What I have started doing since December 17:
- AA - meetings, sponsor, steps, going out for coffee
- SR - reading, posting, asking for help, helping others
- prayer, a bit of meditation
- spiritual reading
- reaching out to family & friends for support
- drinking "friends" are no longer a part of my life (happened naturally)
- sober and non-problem drinker friends are a bigger part of my life
It may seem like I spend a lot of time on my recovery but I really enjoy it (most of the time). This is the longest that I have been sober since I was 15.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2003
Posts: 12,136
I've relapsed twice in my 7 years in the rooms of AA.
Recovery is my #1 priority today - and all that it entails - meetings, growing spiritually, helping the newcomer - basically, the willingness to do whatever it takes. For me, it means looking fear in the face and having the faith to walk through it.
Recovery is my #1 priority today - and all that it entails - meetings, growing spiritually, helping the newcomer - basically, the willingness to do whatever it takes. For me, it means looking fear in the face and having the faith to walk through it.
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